Session 696

Kindness and Helpfulness


“Kindness and Helpfulness”
“Unexpressed Aspects of Self”
“If You Build It, They Will Come”

Sunday, September 24, 2000-1
© 2001  (Private/Phone)
Participants:  Mary (Michael) and Rodney (Zacharie).
Elias arrives at 8:15 a.m. (Arrival time is 18 seconds)

ELIAS:  Good morning!

RODNEY:  Good morning, sir! (Elias chuckles)  Forgive me for calling you sir. (Elias chuckles)  Ha!  It’s so automatic — I have say, how are you this morning?

ELIAS:  Ah!  And I may respond automatically also and express, as always! (Grinning)

RODNEY:  As always! (Laughing)

ELIAS:  Ha ha!

RODNEY:  I have some questions.

ELIAS:  Very well.

RODNEY:  We kind of said something about talking about kindness and helpfulness the last time we talked.

ELIAS:  Correct.

RODNEY:  In mulling this over, I remembered a dream, and it’s one of the most dramatic dreams I’ve ever had.  It occurred in relationship to going into New York City and involving myself in a program to help the homeless.  I had felt a very strong pull to do this.  At the same time, there was a very strong idea or concept in me — or judgment — which said, these people should be able to take care of themselves.

So, I debated in my mind, trying to determine how I truly felt about this.  Did I really want to go in and donate my time and effort, or did I want to choose not to, out of a sense that it really was not a helpful thing for me to do, to go in there?

So, consequently I went to bed one night, refusing to kind of make a decision on this because I really didn’t know how I felt, and in the middle of the night, I woke up with this dream.  I won’t give you all of the details, but in the dream, I must have urinated at least half a dozen times.

I found myself on the top of the tallest building in the universe.  It was so tall, you couldn’t see the bottom.  An associate of mine — and I don’t know who he was, myself also, perhaps - had attempted to climb down the side of this building, holding onto the bricks, and as he was doing so, the bricks turned into curtains, which was curtains for him because he fell! (Elias grins, and Vic cracks up!)

At the end of the dream, I am urinating for the last time in the bathroom, and the bathroom turns into an elevator which is falling, and then the elevator disappears, and it is only myself falling.  I don’t know if I’ve ever had a dream in which I experienced falling, but this experience was so dramatic that I sat bolt upright in bed, and realized that I was awake and falling at the same time.  I had a sense that way below me was a huge lotus blossom that I was falling into.  I’m not certain of that, but I believe that was the case.

I’ve always felt that this dream had something to do with how I relate to helping other people, and how I relate to helping other people who might be able to help themselves, and are not.

The result of all this is that even though I could not become clear as to how I truly felt about going in and helping them, I did anyway.  I chose to go in and do it anyway, and when I say I went in to do it, this was a program that lasted almost a year, and I was going in like on a weekly basis, and it turned into an incredible amount of fun for me.  I wound up sleeping on park benches with my homeless people, and going out and getting a little drunk with them.  All in all, it was an incredible experience, and as that seems to be my intent in life, it seems to be so natural.

So, kind of with that dream in the background, could you talk to me about helpfulness and kindness, and whether or not that dream truly relates, as I feel it does?

ELIAS:  I shall express to you first of all, you are correct that this dream imagery is associated with this subject matter, and allowing yourself to view your responses to certain situations which are influenced by your beliefs.

Now; all of these expressions that you have offered this morning are all interrelated, in actuality, and all may be viewed in association with our discussion of helpfulness and kindness, and the beliefs associated with these identifications of actions.

In this, you present to yourself two significant actions in symbology within your dream imagery.  The two significant actions within your dream imagery are the action of falling and the action of the urination.  One is your symbology to yourself of a feeling of a lack of control; the other is your symbology to yourself concerning waste.

Now; you view these two expressions in relation to yourself and to other individuals simultaneously.

You may view situations and assess that the individual that is creating a particular design of experience is creating a lack of control and an expression of wastefulness in energy and in purpose.

You also simultaneously attribute those associations to self, for you view that your actions in association with another individual may be wasted and shall not be an exhibition of control, for you do not control other individuals and their choices.

Now; be remembering, we are speaking within the context of the beliefs that are influencing of you.  For in actuality, as I have stated previously, there is no actual exhibition of control within energy.  This is an illusion and a configuration of behavior which is quite influenced by your beliefs.

As to the subject matter of waste in energy, although I may express that worry and guilt may be close to an expression of wastefulness in energy, in actuality, there is no wastefulness in any expression of energy.

RODNEY:  So I do believe — if I hear you — I have a belief that I can control things.

ELIAS:  Yes, and you also hold beliefs that influence you in the association of wastefulness — wastefulness of energy, wastefulness of talents, wastefulness of purpose, wastefulness of direction.

RODNEY:  Yes, yes, yes.

ELIAS:  In this, there are very strong beliefs which are held en masse that you associate with concerning helpfulness and kindness.

Now; you define these terms as actions, and these actions are defined as expressions that are offered outwardly to other individuals or to other expressions of consciousness, or that these expressions may be at times intentionally objectively offered to self, but it is defined within your terms as an intentional action.

You do not associate these terms of kindness or helpfulness as being, but as doing.  There is a vast difference.  For in being, you allow a natural flow of energy, and you do not narrow your movement by the incorporation of thought.

RODNEY:  You just do it.

ELIAS:  Correct.

RODNEY:  It just happens.

ELIAS:  Or, you merely ARE.

RODNEY:  Okay.

ELIAS:  Thought many times limits your movement within your choices — not always, but many times — for as you incorporate thought, in a manner of speaking, you streamline your attention, and in this, you focus your attention quite singularly in the communication of this one aspect of yourself — the expression of thought.

Now; thoughts also are extremely influenced by your beliefs.  This is an avenue in which your beliefs create a type of stronghold in the influence of your perception.

Now; as you look to the creations of other individuals — and we may incorporate your example of individuals that you identify as homeless — there are many associations that you create, and many judgments which are influenced by your beliefs.  You view these individuals to be less fortunate than yourself.

RODNEY:  Right.

ELIAS:  You view these individuals to be exhibiting some expressions of helplessness.

RODNEY:  Yes, right.

ELIAS:  You view these individuals to be victims.  Be it of circumstance or themselves or of other individuals — it matters not — there is an association with victim-ness.


ELIAS:  You view these individuals also in an expression of frustration.


ELIAS:  For in nobility, you wish these individuals to be bettering themselves.

RODNEY:  Ha ha!  Yes.

ELIAS:  And YOU wish to be instrumental in that expression of bettering!

RODNEY:  Yes, yes, yes!

ELIAS:  And in this, you create two opposing actions influenced by two opposing aspects of beliefs simultaneously within yourself, for one aspect of expression moves in the direction of a perception that you are in a position ...

RODNEY:  Excuse me, Elias. (Short pause)  Okay, I’m sorry.  Please continue.

ELIAS:  Very well.

... of better than the other individuals.  But simultaneously, you hold an opposing aspect of belief in relation to control, which expresses to you that you are NOT creating control, and therefore you are NOT better than these individuals.

Be remembering also what we have discussed previously in relation to sameness and difference.  As you view an individual that chooses to be creating their reality quite differently from yourself, this is perceived by you as threatening.  Sameness is associated with validation.  Difference is associated with threat.  This expression creates other automatic expressions.

In a manner of speaking, as you encounter these types of situations, although your intention objectively within your thoughts is to be expressing helpfulness and kindness and compassion, in the encounter within self, you create a type of domino action, for you set into motion an interplay of many aspects of beliefs which are all associated to self, and they are being exhibited by the imagery that you draw to yourself in the display of other individuals.

Are you following thus far?

RODNEY:  Well, I’m having a little difficulty, but I will have the transcript.

ELIAS:  In this, the associations of kindness and helpfulness, in your definitions, hold great strength in your beliefs, and therefore in your perception.  For these are expressions that you view to be good, to be positive, to be noble.

RODNEY:  Right.  I understand that.

ELIAS:  But there is also a very strong recognition within you — although it may not be defined within your thoughts — that you do not create other individuals’ realities.  This directly is influencing of your association with your own beliefs concerning self, in triggering beliefs concerning self.  For you also underlyingly hold aspects of beliefs that you do not control self either, and that you do not create your reality in its entirety either.

Therefore, not only may you not be creating of another individual’s reality, but you hold uncertainty inwardly as to the actual creation of your OWN reality.

RODNEY:  So what I hear ... so it appears that when someone else appears to me to need help, this raises all of these uncertainties.

ELIAS:  Yes.

RODNEY:  And therefore frustrations, not just about helping them, but about my own perceptions of myself.

ELIAS:  Yes, and in this....

RODNEY:  And this is upsetting.

ELIAS:  Yes.  You are strongly motivated at times to be projecting energy outwardly in the attempt to be expressing what you identify as helpfulness or kindness to other individuals, that you may be expressing a type of false validation to yourself — that you do express control, that you are a good individual, that you are acceptable, that you are worthy of your own expression of trust within self, and that you hold the ability to be better and therefore noble.

RODNEY:  Wow.  All of that in there! (Laughing)

ELIAS:  Ha ha!

Now; there are expressions of genuine kindness and genuine helpfulness.  But I may express to you that the expressions of genuineness, in these terms, is quite different from what you define as kindness and as helpfulness.

RODNEY:  Would you give me an example?

ELIAS:  In this, we return to the expression of acceptance and trust of self.  For in actuality, in the movement of creating the expression of trust and acceptance of self, you reconfigure the energy of self, and as I have stated previously, this creates an automatic byproduct of acceptance of other individuals.

This is expressed quite literally, Zacharie, for be remembering, without skipping shells, we have touched upon the subject matter that you are not merely creating every element within your reality, even other individuals, but that you ARE every expression within your reality.  Therefore....

RODNEY:  Yeah, that puts a whole other layer on this.

ELIAS:  Quite, for in this, as you become accepting of self....

RODNEY:  You become accepting of the other person, who is expressing something that’s frustrating you.

ELIAS:  Every other individual that you present to yourself is a creation that you have expressed as a latent and unexpressed aspect of you in the design of your individual attention. (Emphatically)

Therefore, you view yourself to be one separate individual entity, one physical body, one physical identification of a particular personality.  You view yourself quite separate from every other aspect of your reality within this physical dimension.  As you encounter another individual, you view that individual to be another separate entity.

Now; what I am expressing to you is the identification of the automatic byproduct of the acceptance of other individuals in the acceptance of self, and the reason that this action occurs so automatically is that in accepting self, there is also an underlying recognition and knowing — underline knowing — that the other individual is not separate, but is an expression of you, which is a latently or unexpressed aspect of this particular attention.

I am understanding that this is, within your assessment, objectively quite abstract, but it also quite genuinely is reality.

In this, the expression of kindness is offered in the projection of energy of acceptance, and in that one expression, there is also an offering of helpfulness in genuine manner.

Now; let us, you and I, momentarily engage in a recognition of a type of individual that you individually associate as exhibiting this quality of acceptance.  Now; turn your attention momentarily and allow yourself the visualization and the thought of an eastern monk.

RODNEY:  Okay.

ELIAS:  In this, allow yourself momentarily to visualize yourself in the presence, so to speak, physically, of an individual of this type.

RODNEY:  Okay.

ELIAS:  You shall express to me that the sensation you experience in relation to this individual may be an expression of kindness, of gentleness, and even of helpfulness, but that individual may not in actuality be DOING anything, in your physical terms.

RODNEY:  Right.

ELIAS:  You shall allow yourself the recognition of these expressions all simultaneously, merely in the acceptance of the energy which is projected by this individual, for the individual is expressing an acceptance and calmness of self.  There is a trust and an acceptance which is exhibited, and that expression projects outward, so to speak, and stimulates a response in like kind within you.

RODNEY:  Okay, I understand that.

ELIAS:  As it stimulates the response in like kind within you, there is an automatic validation that you offer to yourself, creating a momentary expression of acceptance within you.

Now; let us return to your example of these individuals that you have identified as homeless, and your interaction with them.  Initially, your experience was of hesitation and some confusion.

RODNEY:  Correct.

ELIAS:  But you also allowed yourself to be participating with these individuals, to the point of participating physically in some expressions of lifestyle, so to speak.

RODNEY:  Yes, I did.

ELIAS:  In this, what have you offered to yourself, and therefore subsequently also offered to these individuals, in the very subject matter of kindness and helpfulness?

RODNEY:  I perceived that sleeping on a park bench in the middle of the night with total strangers was far more acceptable than I had previously thought.

ELIAS:  You have offered an expression of acceptance to self, and in that movement, you have also automatically created an expression of acceptance of the other individuals.

And in this, there is a reception of that energy, and an association by the other individuals of your genuine expression of kindness and helpfulness — WITHOUT the attempt to be altering the situation, the circumstances, or the choices of the other individuals, WITHOUT the attempt of directing the other individuals into betterment, but merely in acceptance, that the choice which is being created is merely a choice.

RODNEY:  You know, I’m beginning to remember some of my feelings back then, and I look back and see that I made friends with a great many of these people, and I actually miss them, and I actually miss some of the craziness that we experienced together.

ELIAS:  (Chuckling)  What a marvelous experience you have offered to yourself in objective terms, in your entrepreneurism! (Chuckling)

RODNEY:  (Laughing)  Yes.  Yes indeed! (Elias chuckles)  Thank you, Elias, so much for talking about this.

ELIAS:  You are quite welcome, my friend.

Be reminding of yourself that the definitions that you hold within physical focus of these noble terms — of kindness, of compassion, of gentleness, of helpfulness — are illusions, and the genuine expression of these terms is exceedingly powerful, as it may be displayed in the all-encompassing term of acceptance.

RODNEY:  I must tell you of an experience that I created only a few days ago.  I believe it was created to highlight my interest in this topic and my impending discussion with you.

I walked into a supermarket, into the fresh produce section, to pick up some fruit and things, and as I was standing in an open bin about three feet high, selecting some pears and putting them into a bag, a man approached the far side of the open bin.  He was accompanied by a large woman — I only say large because she was big enough to at least attempt to restrain him.

This man appeared to me to be perhaps 25 or 30 years old, and he began grabbing the pears in bunches and pulling them onto the floor.  He did it once, he did it twice, he did it three times, and then she was attempting to restrain him and asked him not to do that, and then he moved around to the end.  There was a bookcase kind of affair, and it was laden with packages of dried fruits and things, and he began grabbing them and throwing them on the floor.  I felt an overwhelming urge to go around and restrain him, and at the same time, I sensed the inappropriateness of my action.  I did not know this man, I had never seen him before, and I did not know his relationship to this woman.  Something in me said, just allow this to be; just allow it.

I noticed that everyone else in the store had disappeared, so I did call for a manager because I seemed to be the only one there who had the presence of mind to do that.  But she eventually managed to convince him to leave the store, and the only thing she said during this entire process was, “This is an experience,” and I believe she said, if memory serves me correctly, “He’s an obsessive compulsive.”

It was kind of like a surrealistic event for me, because I stood there watching this, and I had a sense that I was creating this in some way, that there was a purpose in my creating this, and the only thing that was of value for me to do was to stand there and observe it and allow it.

ELIAS:  Quite, and....

RODNEY:  And if I may interject this, in a sense, I was accepting what was happening, and even though I had this tremendous urge to correct the situation, I also had ... a larger aspect of my energy was simply to allow it to be.

ELIAS:  This is your offering to yourself in an allowance, in what you term to be practical objective terms, in practicing your expression of acceptance of self.

Now; in this, you have allowed yourself movement into noticing, and in that noticing, you are also creating the beginnings of a genuineness in the expression of acceptance.  You have not moved into that expression in its entirety, but you are creating a movement into the beginnings of this type of expression.

For in allowing yourself to continue to participate in observation and in noticing, you also allowed yourself to turn your attention to self, recognizing some aspect, in objective terms, [of] what I have been expressing to you — that the other individual is an unexpressed aspect of you.


ELIAS:  And therefore, you are correct that you are creating this action.

Now; let me also express to you, you may view with interest and curiosity objectively these types of situations within your physical reality, and the response, as you have noted, of other individuals, which quickly remove themselves from the physical location and therefore from the participation objectively in the disturbance, so to speak, for there is a general experience of uncomfortableness.

RODNEY:  Right.

ELIAS:  This uncomfortableness is directly associated with mass beliefs that you each incorporate within you, as to the association of acceptable and not acceptable behaviors, and is also directly associated with your assessments of acceptability and worth of self.


ELIAS:  Therefore, as those aspects of self are challenged in objective imagery, there is an immediate retreat and a movement of withdrawal, that individuals shall turn their attention and not allow themselves to view those aspects of themselves that they do not accept.

RODNEY:  I understand.

ELIAS:  Now; in the acceptance of self, and the recognition that the expression of the other individual is also an expression of you and the acceptance of that, you may fascinate yourselves rather than frustrate yourselves in these types of situations, for as the acceptance is expressed, the behavior discontinues, for it is unnecessary to be continuing the behavior to acquire the attention.

RODNEY:  You know, at one point, when he was emptying this bookcase, I realized he was gonna empty the whole thing, and then the thought occurred to me, when he’s finished with that, he’s gonna go over to the apples, and he’s gonna have this entire produce section on the floor.  It occurred to me at that point, okay!  So?  Let it happen!

ELIAS:  Quite.

RODNEY:  I truly did accept the possibility that he was gonna create shambles of the whole place, and it was at that point that she very quickly convinced him, and I don’t know how this happened, but before I knew it, she and he were out the door!

ELIAS:  I express to you, my friend, this is, genuinely, movement into the beginnings of actual expressions of acceptance.  For in actuality, what shall it matter?  If all of the apples are spilled upon your floor, shall this deteriorate all of the wondrousness of your reality that you have created?

RODNEY:  (Laughing)  Right!

ELIAS:  Ha ha ha ha!  It is merely an experience, and why shall you deem this to be right or wrong or acceptable or not acceptable?  The reason that you create these associations is that you are triggering those beliefs within self.

You are not expressing that the behavior of this individual is bad or wrong.  This is the camouflage that you present to yourself — the projection of energy and attention to another individual, and the creation of a judgment upon the other individual.  This is the facade.  In actuality, your judgment is quite definitely turned to self, and the response is directly associated to your assessment of self.

RODNEY:  Okay.  Thank you, Elias.

ELIAS:  You are quite welcome, my friend.

RODNEY:  This is great — I just gotta say that!  It’s great having these talks with you.

ELIAS:  Ha ha ha ha ha!

RODNEY:  I would like to move on, in the few minutes that we have left, to another couple of questions.

ELIAS:  Very well.

RODNEY:  I asked for the name, family, and alignment of some people in my circle last time, and I forgot one person, and I would like to have that information for her as well.  Could you give that to me?

ELIAS:  Very well.

RODNEY:  Her name is Astrid; A-S-T-R-I-D. (Pause)

ELIAS:  Essence name, Bebe; B-E-B-E. (beh’bee)

RODNEY:  That’s B as in boy?

ELIAS:  Correct.

RODNEY:  Bebe.

ELIAS:  Correct.

RODNEY:  Wow, okay.

ELIAS:  Essence family, Tumold; alignment, Borledim.

RODNEY:  Borledim.

ELIAS:  Orientation, common.

RODNEY:  Okay, thank you.

ELIAS:  You are quite welcome.

RODNEY:  One other quick question.  Someone has been ... you know, I find that an awful lot of information comes to me from other people’s expressions, and I’m talking about expressions that ... I don’t know whether it’s their intention or not to give me the data, but it seems to be in their words somehow.

And along that vein, a person suggested to me that they felt I had another focus who was a famous scientist, and I believe the name was Roger Bacon.  I know I studied a scientist by the name of Bacon many years ago in my youth, and I’ve pretty much forgotten what he did or stood for.  But I was wondering if there was any validity to her expression.

ELIAS:  I may express to you that there is a misinterpretation in the assessment of the identification of another focus of yours in this particular identification, although I may also express to you that if you are so choosing, you may allow yourself to be accessing physical information concerning this particular individual, and in that action, you may be offering yourself impressions as to the actual identification of the focus which you have created, which is in association with this individual.

RODNEY:  I see.  I thank you for that.

ELIAS:  You are quite welcome.

RODNEY:  I will enjoy that!

ELIAS:  Ha ha ha ha!

RODNEY:  Along the same lines, when I was a child ... I was born in 1933, so my experience of the second world war was as a child.  When I got into high school, I became fascinated with the man they called Hitler.  I read two or three books on him for my English assignments, to the point where my English teacher told me she would not allow me to read more books on him.  She wanted me to have a greater variety.  We’ve spoken in the past about my association with a rather fearsome individual, perhaps associated with coliseums and ancient history.

ELIAS:  Correct.

RODNEY:  And I was wondering, what associations do I have with this man called Hitler? (Pause)

ELIAS:  The reason you have incorporated a fascination with this individual is not that you have incorporated an involvement in physical terms with this individual, for you have not.

Now; I may express to you that you do hold other focuses that experience similar types of expressions as this particular individual.  Therefore, there is an objective association and fascination in that regard.

I may also express to you that within that time framework, other aspects of your essence are focused in participation with this movement of what you term to be this great war, but not directly associated with that particular individual.

Now; in relation to your focus presently and your intent in this focus, your fascination with other expressions that you are not creating yourself presently is an aspect of the expression of your intent.

RODNEY:  Really!

ELIAS:  This be the reason that you may create certain fascinations with certain events or individuals historically, or even within your present time framework, that are expressing what appears to you to be extremes in some manner, of experiences or actions or choices that you do not create yourself individually within this time framework.

This allows you some aspect of association, in drawing upon that energy, to be contributing the association of those experiences in this focus, in adding to, so to speak, the experiences that you individually are creating in this expression of your intent.

You also allow yourself at times an intensity of drawing energy to yourself through counterpart action, for this is an expression of your intent — allowing yourself to be experiencing as many and as full of experiences, in physical terms, as you may within the time framework that you have created as your movement in this particular focus.

RODNEY:  Does this have anything to do with a couple of dreams I had only a few days ago?  One, I’m on a very small island, and there are creatures in the very deep water that are coming up very near to the land, and I am fearful that they are capable of coming onto the land and destroying me.

Then there is another dream in which I participated in the act of allowing another man to be executed in order to save myself, even though I knew he was innocent.  Now, the feelings surrounding that particular vision were very strong.  These are feelings that in an objective, conscious way, I probably would not allow myself to feel.

ELIAS:  Quite, and this also is an exercise in your movement in acceptance.

RODNEY:  Okay.  Because I get a sense that those experiences are experiences that I am drawing to myself, either through counterpart action or through the experience of other focuses.

ELIAS:  Correct.

RODNEY:  Okay.

ELIAS:  Let me express to you, Zacharie, acceptance is not so narrow as to merely be encompassing of this one focus of attention.  This is....

RODNEY:  I’m aware of that! (Laughing)  No, acceptance is ultimately broadened to include all of my other focuses.

ELIAS:  Yes, and all of your experiences.

RODNEY:  Okay. (Elias chuckles)  One really quick question.

ELIAS:  Very well.

RODNEY:  We hopefully are going to create a forum for you here next month, in a few weeks, here in New Jersey.  My associate in this has asked me to ask you, what are any suggestions on your part as to how we might be more productive in our efforts here?

ELIAS:  Ha ha ha ha!  I may express to you that I am already offering energy to your expressions.  Now; you may be helpful to yourselves in allowing yourselves more of an expression of trust.

RODNEY:  Okay. (Elias chuckles)  Okay, I thought you might say that!

ELIAS:  And shall we be expressing the acknowledgment of Lawrence and of Michael, in their physical recognition and association — quite cliché-ish, in a manner of speaking, but also quite accurate.  I shall express to you, in like manner to them, “If you create this, the individuals shall come.”

RODNEY:  Thank you! (Laughing, and Elias chuckles)  Thank you!

ELIAS:  You are welcome.

RODNEY:  Okay, it’s time for us to say goodbye again.

ELIAS:  Very well.  I continue to express energy and encouragement to you, and I shall also continue to be offering my energy in your objective creation of our meeting.  In this, I extend to you, my friend, a great blanket of affection, and anticipate our next encounter objectively.  To you this day, quite lovingly, au revoir.

RODNEY:  Goodbye.

Elias departs at 9:25 a.m.


(1)  Vic’s note:  I have changed the following phrase: “Now; what I am expressing to you is the identification of the automatic byproduct of the acceptance of other individuals in the acceptance of self...”  It was originally stated, “Now; what I am expressing to you is the identification of the automatic byproduct of acceptance of self in the acceptance of other individuals...”

© 2001  Vicki Pendley/Mary Ennis

Copyright 2000 Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved.