“Exploring Self Worth”
“The Pony IS You”
Friday, July 28, 2000
(Private/Phone) © 2001
Participants: Mary (Michael) and Jim (Yarr).
Elias arrives at 9:42 AM. (Arrival time is 24 seconds)
ELIAS: Good morning, Yarr!
JIM: Good morning, Elias! How’s it goin’ in Cosmic Land?
ELIAS: Ha ha ha! As always!
JIM: As always, as it is here on our Planet Earth!
ELIAS: And how be you in your Adventures into Convolution? Ha ha!
JIM: (Laughing) Oh, twisting, untwisting, twisting in different directions. It goes on, always exploring, always investigating.
ELIAS: Exploring the different manifestations and expressions of the convoluted little sapling!
JIM: Yes, I like that!
ELIAS: HA HA HA!
JIM: It even has purpose to it! (Laughing, and Elias chuckles)
I’d like to start off today where we ended our last session, with my pony and the color exercise that you offered to me, and where I am with that briefly. I went to two areas, one on her hock, and first I had an impression that it was one color, but then another color, red, came in very, very strongly, and then on her elbow, the color green and the tone of “ti” came in very strongly. Since then, I have been working with that exercise to not judge these areas, but I still seem to hold onto it. It has helped tremendously, I think, in my judgment and my assessment of something being wrong, because you are correct — it is difficult to put that expression on the color. Am I kind of hitting in the right direction with this?
I had the impression from a friend of mine that is also with me on this, and she expressed yesterday that she feels the pony is getting tired of all this, and I guess I am too! (Laughing, and Elias grins) I was wondering if you could offer me some additional insight into this situation, and where I might be going with it. (Elias chuckles)
ELIAS: I shall express to you that you are allowing yourself in increments to be moving into the expression that we discussed in our last engagement together, although you are continuing to view the color as a separated entity from you.
As you recall, I have expressed to you to choose the imagery of a color for the quality of its neutrality, but also to BECOME that expression, or allow yourself to BE the expression.
Therefore, it matters not which color you choose, and it is not necessarily an expression of significance in the color. Your identification with significance in the color is a continuation of viewing the color as an entity in itself, separated from you.
This exercise was presented to you as a step in movement into the recognition that the creature — the pony — IS you, but recognizing that this may be difficult and more challenging for you to move into a genuine expression of, in the identification that you ARE the pony.
I have offered the exercise of introducing the color in association with the manifestation of a malady, which you may view as a portion of the pony, and in assuming that portion temporarily as an exercise, you may allow yourself to BECOME that expression, or recognize that that expression IS you, not a separate entity.
As to your assessment and your interaction with the other individual, expressing that you are tiring of this exercise and that the creature is tiring of this also ... you are correct! Ha ha ha ha ha! (Elias is cracking himself up here!)
Now; in this, you may allow yourself that recognition, and respond to yourself in the recognition of the information that you are offering to yourself. You both are tiring of this action. Therefore, you are offering yourself information to be discontinuing this interaction, and you may allow yourself to create an action in compliance with the information that you are offering to you, and distract your attention in another area or direction.
My suggestion to you is that you distract your attention away from this particular pony altogether, so to speak, temporarily, for you have created a concentration of energy between yourself and this creature. In another layer of expression, you have created an intensity of concentration between YOU and YOU.
And in this, as you allow yourself to distract your attention and reduce the incorporation of tension within your energy, you may also allow yourself a refreshment, so to speak, within your expression of energy, and you may re-approach this interaction in a different angle futurely.
Many times, as you or other individuals concentrate your attention so intensely in one particular direction, you DO create this action that you identify as spinning upon your hamster wheel, for you block out all of your periphery, and you focus your attention in such a narrow field that you do not allow other information or other experiences to penetrate that field of experience, and you do not allow yourself to access other choices and other information.
JIM: Yeah, I recall a number of years ago with my dog, and the licking of his feet and getting sores, and I was so intent on doing something, and it seemed that after we spoke and I distracted myself, he also stopped licking himself, and the areas healed, and so this is along the same lines.
ELIAS: Quite. YOU are creating the action, and as it continues to bother you or irritate you or confuse you or create conflict within you, you continue to concentrate upon the action that is being created, and as you continue to concentrate, you continue to hold your attention in that direction and perpetuate the creation.
JIM: Okay, okay. That was wonderful. Thank you. (Elias chuckles) I have some work to do there, and I don’t have some work to do there!
ELIAS: HA HA!
JIM: I have some investigating to do, and not some investigating to do! Okay, that makes a lot of sense.
When we had spoken in the past about the vibrational qualities of our colors and our energy centers, we had spoken of vibrational speed, so to speak. In moving through my energy centers and looking at red and then looking at magenta, as our energies move up through our bodies, it seems that the energy moves faster, so to speak.
However, magenta is at the very top, and to me is somewhat the same hue as red. Magenta isn’t necessarily a faster color than white or black. Is it more in alignment with red in its vibrational speed? Do you follow me?
ELIAS: I am understanding. (Pause, and then speaking carefully)
As being a dominant hue, so to speak, it does incorporate a vibrational quality in similarity to the vibrational expressions of the other colors, so to speak.
What I am expressing to you in this is, each of the other colors — save white and black — hold a vibrational quality which is identifiable to the dominant hue of that particular color, in a manner of speaking.
You are correct in your physical assessment — that as you move through these colors in energy centers from the red upward, so to speak, the speed, so to speak, or the vibrational quality of the particular colors increases or becomes more rapid. Therefore, this color of magenta also increases in its vibrational quality.
Now; white and black hold a vibrational quality which is similar enough to almost be the same, and both of these vibrational qualities are expressed in such an excessive rapidness, so to speak, that they may appear to be motionless.
JIM: Yes, I’ve experienced that.
ELIAS: In this, the quality of magenta, in vibrational tone, is a combination of the end expressions of spectrum — of red and purple — in combination with white. Therefore, in the recognition of the formula, so to speak, of this particular vibrational quality, you may identify that its speed or rapidness is greater in expression than purple. Are you understanding?
JIM: Yes, I’m following you. That’s fascinating. Okay, that makes sense. I’m gonna investigate more. That’s fun!
ELIAS: Ha ha!
JIM: Quite a while back, we had discussed my working with animals versus working with people, and you had directed me in saying that I should move into my own species more. (Laughing, and Elias chuckles) Things have kind of been coming up, and individuals have been coming up, and I would like to get some insight, I guess, as to my intent and desire in this area, and perhaps define more of a direction that I may be moving into with this.
ELIAS: Very well. Define your direction. HA HA HA! (Elias is cracking himself up again!)
JIM: And just move! (Laughing, and Elias chuckles)
ELIAS: I am expressing to you, are you choosing to be engaging discussion of this subject matter? If so, offer an identification of which expression you wish clarification in relation to.
JIM: In working with people, what area, I guess, is my subjective desire moving into? I don’t feel anymore that it’s within a healer expression, but perhaps a teaching expression, offering information to people as to how they may access their inner healing abilities or gain knowledge of their healing abilities. I guess that’s somewhat my desire, but I don’t want to push or be intrusive or any of those things.
ELIAS: I am aware, and I shall express to you, Yarr, you also hold an awareness of this expression of intrusiveness or pushing in relation to other individuals. You offer yourself many examples that you may be practicing with in NOT exhibiting those types of expressions, and as you continue to hold an objective awareness, you also are not moving yourself in those types of expressions of being intrusive in relation to other individuals.
I may express to you that you are interpreting your own impressions, and you are allowing yourself to pay attention to your movement.
You also shall continue to be practicing and exploring your movement and your abilities in relation to your creatures, for this is beneficial to you and quite familiar, and offers you an ease in your engagement of practicing.
But you also may be engaging interaction with individuals, and in this, my encouragement extends to you to be continuing to listen to your impressions, for you are offering yourself a direction.
JIM: Okay, I follow that, which leads into the cessation of my use of cannabis, which for many years was a very big hamster wheel, and recently, my cessation of it — as you expressed many years ago — did not come out of will, but just out of desire, it seems at this point. I will never go there again, but the pattern I had put myself into is a place I don’t want to go back to at this time. It feels like this is a place I don’t want to go back to again. I’m very much enjoying the clarity that I have now, and I feel that this is a very strong impression and direction of essence.
ELIAS: I am understanding of what you are expressing.
Let me express to you, Yarr, this is a beneficial action that you are incorporating in this now, for it is offering you an alteration of perception, and in that turning of perception, you allow yourself to be incorporating different actions and creating different choices, and also allowing yourself, in this identification of clarity, the ability to examine your individual beliefs — which influence your perception and therefore also influence the creation of your reality — in relation to this particular subject matter.
Now; in allowing yourself to be examining those beliefs, you may also allow yourself to move into a recognition, in genuineness and in acceptance, that the actual engagement of this particular substance creates a particular influence upon your reality as you design it to, not that it in itself is affecting of you or of your reality in any particular manner outside of your design. Are you understanding?
JIM: Yes, I believe I follow.
ELIAS: Therefore, you are offering yourself an opportunity to view that YOU are what is creating the design of the effect, and in this, you also hold the ability to create other effects, or no effects.
Of course, why shall you engage this activity if you are choosing to create no effects? HA HA! (Elias is cracking himself up again!)
But this also offers you the opportunity to engage your periphery, and recognize that YOU are manipulating your reality, and creating specific effects in relation to your beliefs that YOU hold.
JIM: Okay, I follow you there. Okay.
ELIAS: Therefore, allow yourself the recognition ... not to be discounting your choice in this present now, for this is beneficial, and acknowledging of yourself in your choice in this now of this particular direction, but also offering yourself a recognition that you may futurely choose to be altering this choice once again, and you may choose to be engaging that activity once again, and you may also choose the design of the effect that you shall incorporate, for you do hold this power.
JIM: Okay, that makes sense. (Elias chuckles) Okay, that’s good. Thank you.
ELIAS: You are quite welcome.
JIM: Michael and I, or Joshuatree, as he’s formally known as....
ELIAS: HA HA HA HA!
JIM: I prefer to call myself Baobab! (Laughing)
ELIAS: HA HA! More expressions of our affectionately viewed convoluted explorations! Ha ha ha ha!
JIM: Yes! My new essence name is Hardyharyarr! (Laughing, and Elias chuckles)
But the assessment of self-worth, and we discussed this in our last session ... as we’ve discussed, I think, in every session in which we’ve ever spoken! (They both laugh)
But your self-worth is not dependent upon your deeds, and it’s not dependent upon your actions. There’s many things it’s not dependent upon, and you expressed in the last session that we look to outside validation and apply it to self as an assessment of self-worth, and that this is a false assessment of worth, trust, and abilities, and to trust in self.
Michael and I talked about like versus dislike versus preference and so forth. There seems to be, I guess, some sort of ... I would like to look for some sort of replacement for this action that we feel we need from outside. I know it’s trust from inside, but I would like to see if I couldn’t investigate in some way or find a link of sorts, so that I can begin to see not so much from looking outside, and move more strongly into inside and become more confident, I guess, in that area from within.
ELIAS: Very well. I shall express to you in response to your engagement of conversation presently.
You are inquiring, what is the worth of self? What is the recognition of the worth of self if it is not identifiable through all that you have offered in examples — of which we have spoken previously — and how may you access the recognition of that, correct?
JIM: Correct, and very beautifully put.
ELIAS: Very well.
In this, the worth of self is expressed in the knowing.
The knowing of self is, as we have discussed previously, not necessarily your identification of interpretation through thoughts or emotions or outside validation, for all of these expressions may be influenced by your beliefs and affected by your perception.
The knowing of self, the knowing of YOU and what you ARE and WHO you are, is innately you. And in this, this expression or this innate knowledge is NOT influenced or dependent upon your beliefs or your perception, for it extends beyond merely this physical dimension.
You may access this knowing of your worth through an action of releasing tension within your energy, incorporating a relaxation of your energy, and allowing yourself to become familiar with YOU.
I am aware that I have expressed this many times to all of you thus far. I am also aware that thus far, these are incorporated for the most part as words, and that you are not quite incorporating even the beginning point, to be allowing yourselves to become familiar with you and therefore offer yourselves an objective recognition of your worth, as it IS innately you.
The beginning point is to be noticing and recognizing the tension that you each hold in energy, and allowing yourselves to dispel that tension and incorporate a relaxation of your energy, for as you incorporate tension, you also automatically create barriers, and these barriers create separations.
Therefore, you create a separation in your objective awareness between that objective awareness of self and the familiarity, the familiarization and the recognition of self in its entirety.
To this point in this time framework within this forum, individuals are continuing to view themselves as a singular entity manifestation within a physical dimension, separated from their identification of another entity which is defined as essence, and that essence is separated from another entity which is defined as consciousness, and consciousness occupies a physical — and nonphysical, although the identification of nonphysical incorporates a physical aspect — space within some other unknown entity, which shall be defined as the cosmos!
And in this, as you move your attention to you within this physical manifestation and your identification of yourself, you view yourself to be this one singular entity of physical matter which is separated from all other physical expressions and all nonphysical expressions, even yourself!
What I am expressing to you is, your attention in that corporeal perception incorporates tension, and that tension perpetuates separation, for it directs your attention singularly.
This may be viewed in ANY expression. You may offer yourself examples in quite physical expressions, and it may be applied in ALL expressions of your energy. As you incorporate tension, you also create a singularity of attention and a separation in your creation of reality through perception.
Therefore, your beginning point in your method of discovery of your innate being of worth is to allow yourself to notice and recognize the tension that you incorporate within your energy, and allow yourself the incorporation of RELAXATION of your energy, for this allows opening.
JIM: Yeah, like when I read Shynla’s session with you — breathe! That hit home very deeply the other day.
ELIAS: You express this to each other as a recognition of actual expressions within your physical bodies!
It is quite difficult for you to physically continue in an expression of tension if you are focusing your attention upon your breath and the movement of your breath. As you breathe deeply in physical action, it is difficult to also incorporate tension within your actual physical muscles. It may be accomplished, but it does incorporate difficulty, for the action of opening is contrary to tension.
Opening in your expression of breath is creating not merely the action of filling of your air within your physical body, but expanding of your physical lungs and circulatory system, which is an opening, and that opening is affecting of all of your nervous system and all your organs and all of your tissue — all of your physical expression. This may be applied to any expression of your energy.
As you relax your energy, you also open, and as you open, you engage your periphery. You allow yourself to be viewing more of self, and you allow more of an ease in familiarizing yourself with whatever you direct your attention to, and if that be to self, you shall allow yourself the beginnings of recognition of YOU, in what you are and who you are and your innate expression of worth.
JIM: Okay, I can relate. Okay. (Elias chuckles) I’ve been moving in that direction, knowingly and unknowingly, just with things that I’ve noticed. Like I said, I’ve noticed in the last couple of weeks, or even longer, that I’ve been taking these big deep breaths and feeling this wave of loosening, and these breaths are not so much in a constructive way as in meditation, as in “now I will sit down and breathe.” It seems to be more sporadic, in areas and situations and actions and things that I bring to me. It’s almost an automatic. I don’t even think about it, but all of a sudden, I’ll notice or find myself taking these big deep breaths and relaxing, so I can relate to all that, and thank you.
ELIAS: Quite, and as you practice, you need not be incorporating a thought process. It becomes automatic.
You need not be incorporating this action of what you identify as deep breaths as you continue to be practicing, for you become more familiar with the experience of relaxation, and therefore allow yourself to be incorporating this relaxing without the physical motions or intentional actions of directing your energy purposefully into the expression of relaxation. As you practice, you allow yourself to become relaxed more and more automatically.
JIM: Very good! Once again, just a few tiny little things to work on there!
ELIAS: Ha ha ha ha ha!
JIM: Oh my! (Laughing) Well, I think we’ve spent our time together. I’ve been noticing and appreciating the blue feathers that I’ve been finding, and acknowledging your interaction. As always, it’s greatly appreciated and it’s great encouragement, and I thank you.
ELIAS: And you are very welcome, my friend, and you may continue your collection of your feathers! Ha ha ha!
JIM: Yes! Thank you very much.
ELIAS: And I shall continue to be offering of these manifestations! Ha ha!
JIM: Wonderful! I have three of them in my truck already — little bits of reminder of self.
ELIAS: Yes, my friend. Pay attention! (Chuckling) And I shall be anticipating of our next meeting, and in what you term to be the interim time framework, I shall be offering energy of encouragement to you.
JIM: Thank you. You’re a great friend. Good day.
ELIAS: To you, my friend Yarr, in affection, au revoir.
JIM: Au revoir.
Elias departs at 10:36 AM.
© 2001 Mary Ennis/Vicki Pendley, All Rights Reserved
Copyright 2000 Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved.