Uncomfortable Familiarity
Topics:
“Uncomfortable Familiarity”
“The Orientation of Soft”
Thursday, June 29, 2000
© 2001 (Private/Phone)
Participants: Mary (Michael) and Daryl (Ashrah).
Elias arrives at 3:33 PM. (Arrival time is 22 seconds)
ELIAS: Good afternoon!
DARYL: Hi there! (Elias chuckles)
Okay, I guess I want to start out briefly talking about the throat and
breathing constriction, but I don’t want to spend a lot of time on it.
In the last session, I felt a change actually during the session, where
I started, I guess, understanding acceptance a little more and moving more
in that direction. I’ve also read your transcript about patience,
tolerance, and acceptance, which was really helpful to me, especially the
part about tolerance.
Anyway, my breathing problems decreased, and I ended up having like
a residual constriction and stuff in my throat, which has been very mild,
and I’ve taken that to understand that when it occurs, it’s an expression
of fear, and I thought I was understanding that pretty well, and then last
night I had a short period again of my breathing actually becoming constricted,
and I wondered, was that also an expression of fear, or is there something
else I’m trying to draw to my attention?
ELIAS: Your assessment is correct. This presentment of fear,
as you are aware, continues to express itself within different moments
and present itself as an expression in different manners, as you continue
to address to all of the elements of this fear and move through this issue
in its entirety.
DARYL: Okay. The part last night, did that have anything
to do with having a session today?
ELIAS: Partially.
DARYL: Okay, alright. One other thing I’ve noticed in conjunction
with that is that I feel the relationship between my throat and the energy
entity, and there’s been a change in that. I don’t know how to describe
it exactly, but it’s like the energy seems to be thicker or something,
and it seems sour, or something like that, compared to before, and I was
wondering what that has to do with.
ELIAS: This is your creation of association with this fear, and
moving yourself into an identification of it that is less comfortable and
less acceptable, which shall increase your motivation in your continuation
of addressing to it.
DARYL: Okay, ‘cause there’s also ... I’ve kind of become conditioned
to the other, so I’m not noticing it, and this has kind of gotten my attention
again.
ELIAS: Quite, and this is the reason that you are creating this
type of expression and identification, for in what you term to be an ongoing
process, there is a leaning within individuals to become unmotivated and
bored, and at times complacent with their interaction with the same subject
matter, so to speak.
Therefore, in your desire to be continuing in your addressing to this
particular issue to the point that you have moved through it in its entirety,
you create new expressions and different expressions to continue your motivation
and to continue holding your attention.
DARYL: Okay. That’s real helpful. Thank you.
The main thing I wanted to talk about today is something that you touched
on last time, when you talked about my lack of acceptance of self within
my orientation because it doesn’t fit. You mentioned at that time
that it influenced my fear, duplicity, lack of trust, lack of acceptance,
and my acknowledgment of my abilities and choices, but you also said that
you didn’t want to overwhelm me with information at that time, and I feel
that I could take in a lot of information on that particular subject right
now, so I would like you to expound on that for a while.
ELIAS: (Chuckling) The expression may be, “I am ready now,
Elias!”
DARYL: Yeah, I am. I feel like I’m ready now, and I’ve even
felt like we’ve had interaction regarding this for the past couple days,
in preparation.
ELIAS: You are correct.
DARYL: Okay. (Elias chuckles) So, lay it on me!
ELIAS: Ha ha ha! Very well.
Let me express to you first of all, individuals within your physical
focus, yourself also, create expressions and directions that may, in part,
seem uncomfortable but become comfortable, in a manner of speaking, for
even in the expression of uncomfortableness, there is a familiarity which
creates an element of comfort.
As you have moved within your focus and have attempted to be fitting
yourself into expressions and directions that are not necessarily objectively
compatible, so to speak, with your natural flow of energy in relation to
your orientation, you create — and have created previously — an action
of withdrawal.
Now; let me clarify. I am expressing to you presently of actions
that were created initially much time framework ago, so to speak, within
what you identify as past, and we shall discuss this situation in relation
to your identifications of past and present and future, for this may be
temporarily, in this situation, an efficient manner in which we may be
engaging this subject.
In this, many, many, many years, so to speak, past, you moved in a direction
of attempting to be channeling your energy expression in certain directions
to be conforming and fitting, so to speak, into the design of objective
reality that you perceived to be acceptable, and created a movement in
attempting to alter some of your natural expressions, recognizing that
they naturally were not the same as other individuals.
But this type of action was not continued within you for what we may
express as the majority of time framework, for at a point within your focus,
you turned and created a choice — that you allowed yourself to be recognizing
the extreme difficulty in attempting to be fitting, but not allowing yourself
the recognition that your natural expression was acceptable.
Therefore, you chose to be withdrawing, and in this withdrawal, the
underlying element of fear that had already been created, in a type of
expression of the sleeping monster, became awakened. For as you withdrew,
this monster became bigger and bigger, for this also is a movement contrary
to your natural flow of energy.
But you have become so familiar with the expression that you have chosen
that the movement into the allowance of your natural expression creates
a reinforcement of the fear that you already express, for the movement
in your natural flow of energy is so unfamiliar within your objective perception
that it is more acceptable, within your reality, to be continuing in the
uncomfortable creations and movement of energy than to be moving out of
that safety into the unfamiliar expression, which is YOU.
Now; in this, the movement of energy within time frameworks crosses
over itself, in a manner of speaking, creating what may be viewed as a
confusing grid of energy with what appears to be no boundaries, but merely
continuing in the extension of the lines, in a manner of speaking.
For in actuality, you are creating all of this movement now. You
are creating all of the past movement and all of the future movement now.
This be the reason that I direct your attention so often to viewing and
noticing what you are creating within the now, for this is in actuality
creating the other time frameworks also, simultaneously.
As you continue to view, in clarity and in sharpness, aspects of the
expression of fear that have been expressed pastly, you may also allow
yourself the recognition that the reason you identify within a sharpness
is that you are continuing to be creating that expression now. Therefore,
there continues to be a clarity in relation to that experience in association
with the past.
As you alter your expression within the present, and you dissipate the
element of fear within the present, and you allow a natural flow of your
energy in association with your orientation in the present, the expressions
of the past that once held a clearness and a sharpness begin to blur, in
a manner of speaking. They lose their sharpness, for the present
is altering of the past.
It is not that you are losing, so to speak, your memory of certain actions
or feelings or events within the past, but that the present is in actuality
changing the actions and the experiences of the past.
This also moves in relation to future. A very similar action is
at play, so to speak, in your creation of future.
Now; as you look to your past and you view a clarity and a sharpness
in your identification of certain experiences, as I have stated, you may
also allow yourself to be identifying that you are continuing to be creating
that type of movement presently.
In relation to orientation and what I have expressed to you with regard
to becoming comfortable within the uncomfortable — for it provides you
with familiarity, and this becomes an assessment of safety — you may look
to experiences that you have created for an extended time framework pastly,
and the comfort, being stronger in recognition than the discomfort, holds
your attention in the continuation of the non-acknowledgment of your natural
movement.
Let me offer to you an example.
Within your focus, you have chosen to be creating a certain expression
of lack of interaction with other individuals, correct?
DARYL: Yes.
ELIAS: Very well.
This has been a choice that you have engaged, and you have engaged this
choice, offering yourself the explanation of that choice: that you experience
fear in relation to other individuals, and this creates a tremendous feeling
of a lack of safety within yourself, and although you may wish to be interactive
with some individuals or you may be wishing to create certain types of
relationships with some individuals, you view the uncomfortableness of
a lack of interaction to be less threatening and less fearful than the
natural flow of your energy.
Now; returning to the identification of past experiences and choices,
this situation and direction of attention that you have created has been
influenced by your recognition much time framework ago, in a manner of
speaking, that your natural expression may not be what you identify as
the same as other individuals.
This creates a questioning within self, a doubt within self concerning
your abilities, concerning your acceptability in relation to other individuals,
and also in relation to your own assessment of self.
And in that identification of a lack of acceptability of self — in the
identification of your natural flow of energy and the recognition of difference
— you have chosen to be withdrawing yourself from your natural flow of
expression, for you have not offered yourself the recognition objectively
of how you may be expressing yourself in your natural flow of energy and
expressions, and also fitting into the identification of the sameness with
other individuals.
Now; let me express to you, individuals within your physical dimension
seek out sameness. YOU seek out sameness. The reason that you
seek out sameness is that this expression provides you, within your perception,
a validation of self. It is the manner in which you offer to yourself
your validation, which offers you your assessment of acceptability of self.
And as you look outside of self for your validation, you create comparisons
between yourself and other individuals, between your behaviors and other
individuals’ behaviors, between your choices and other individuals’ choices,
and if you are assessing within your perception that they be similar or
the same, you offer a validation to yourself, for you have forgotten how
to be turning your attention to self and offering yourself your validations
within self.
Therefore, you automatically turn your attention outside of self and
seek out your validation through this method. As you view any expression
outside of yourself that holds difference to yourself, you assess that
you must be malfunctioning or that your behavior, your choices, your expressions
are unacceptable.
In situations many times with individuals that are creating a manifestation
holding the orientation of soft, the individual views many expressions
that appear obviously different in their natural expression from their
comparison to other individuals.
You base your assessment of yourself upon your experiences within this
physical manifestation. Therefore, if your experiences are consistently
moving in a direction of recognition that your expression is different
from other individuals’ expressions, you are repeatedly discounting of
self, and through the movement of a time framework, individuals may move
in the expression of retreat. They may move in the expression of
anger. They may move in the expression of fear, complacency.
They may create an expression of disengaging their allowance for emotional
expression. They may express emotional qualities in extreme.
There are many different types of responses, so to speak, that individuals
engage, but the underlying reason, so to speak — if you need be offering
yourself a reason — is that the individual is not comfortable or offering
themselves a feeling of safety, and is not expressing an acceptability
within self if they are expressing their natural flow of energy.
In this, as I have stated, in many areas within yourself, you have become
comfortable in the uncomfortableness of not expressing your natural flow
of energy. You allow yourself moments of expression in a natural
flow in isolation, so to speak. You allow yourself the safety of
your expression in aloneness, but in that aloneness, you are also not allowing
yourself to be expressing other aspects of your natural flow of energy.
DARYL: So that’s one reason that I do like being alone, ‘cause
I do feel, at times, it frees me up to be me.
ELIAS: Quite, and I am understanding of your choice in this expression,
but it also creates a reinforcement of the fear, for you hold yourself
in this constraint of your energy, and you only allow a free flow of that
energy within certain time frameworks in which you create what you perceive
to be an atmosphere of safety, and this atmosphere of safety, within your
perception, does not include interaction with other individuals.
DARYL: No, it doesn’t. (Laughing, and Elias chuckles)
ELIAS: But as you are aware and may view within yourself, although
you may be creating this environment of safety in this aloneness, you also
obviously view how that choice creates a reinforcement of the fear, and
creates more and more of a separation between yourself and other individuals.
But you continue to hold the desire to be interactive with other individuals.
I am not expressing that you hold a desire to be interactive with crowds,
but you block yourself from interaction with ANY individuals, and this
moves contrary to your natural flow of energy, and you are recognizing
of that, for it creates an uncomfortableness within you and within your
experience, one that you wish to be altering.
But the fear has been reinforced to a tremendous extent, and in that,
as you stand before the entity, so to speak, its girth becomes so very
wide that you hold difficulty in viewing around it and what may lie beyond
it.
DARYL: I know that I feel pretty inept at trying to be around
other people, and I have a tendency to just say, “This is boring and I
want to get away.” But I know a lot of it has to do with just feeling,
I think, my difference between them and me, and not knowing how to deal
with it.
ELIAS: And this be the reason that I continue to be discussing
with you, and expressing to you to turn your attention to self. For
as you continue to allow yourself to become more and more familiar with
yourself, and you allow yourself to move into the expression of acceptance
with self, what you accomplish in this action is the thrust of energy which
strikes down the entity of fear to the degree that it becomes very small,
and as it becomes very small, you allow yourself the opportunity to clear
your vision and view beyond it.
But first, there is importance in the action of offering yourself the
expression of acceptability. For if you are not, in a manner of speaking,
armed with your knowing of acceptance and acceptability of self, as you
encounter difference outside of yourself, you shall automatically move
in the familiar expressions of experiencing threateningness and retreating
once again into the expression of fear, for this is the manifestation of
your lack of acceptance within self.
Therefore, the method, so to speak, to be moving beyond the fear and
into the allowance of your natural expression in its fullness is to be
first turning your attention to self, and offering that acceptance to self
first. (Pause)
DARYL: Okay. Well, I guess I understand, and I am slowly
moving in that direction.
ELIAS: Yes, you are, and I shall express to you, as you are also
aware, you are not so very slowly creating this movement. You are
in actuality creating great strides within your individual movement. (Pause)
DARYL: Okay. (Sighing, and Elias chuckles) I know I am.
It’s just quite a long way to go, from where I’ve been to where I want
to get to.
ELIAS: Or you may allow yourself, in those types of terms, the
recognition of the long way you have come from where you have been!
DARYL: Um-hmm. Now, recently I find myself in a situation
where I’ve actually met some people, and then they want to do things, and
I have this inclination in many cases to not want to do something.
I’d rather be alone, and as I said before, I feel ... I don’t know, like
being alone can be a lot more satisfying, and I don’t feel bored and uncomfortable
and those other things.
Now, in my no-conflict situation, is that to remain being alone until
turning my attention to self actually results in a change, rather than
trying to kind of force myself to be with people?
ELIAS: Yes. I shall express to you that it is, in a manner
of speaking, defeating of your direction to be attempting to be forcing
yourself and forcing your energy into expressions that you are uncomfortable
with and that merely reinforce the expression of fear.
You are addressing to the expression of fear. You are addressing
to this monster. Why shall you offer this monster more sustenance,
that it may grow even larger?
DARYL: I guess because mass beliefs say you’re supposed to face
your fears and go out and deal with them.
ELIAS: Ha ha ha! And I shall express to you that within
your movement, this IS what you are accomplishing, and in not reinforcing
the expression of this fear, you ARE accomplishing addressing to it.
DARYL: Okay. ‘Cause I go in these little circles, and then
I start judging myself for not being with people, and that I’m bad that
I’m not going out there and doing that. (Sighing) It doesn’t help!
ELIAS: I am understanding, and in this, you create these movements
upon your hamster wheel, so to speak, and reinforce this action of duplicity
within yourself. I am expressing to you that it is, in your physical
terms, unproductive, in relation to your objective, to be forcing your
energy in this present time framework.
In actuality, within any time framework, force within energy is not
the expression that shall create your desired effect, so to speak.
DARYL: Okay. So maybe I can let go of that a little bit
then. (Laughing, and Elias chuckles)
Okay. (Sighing) One thing that I wanted to ask you about briefly
is that I had an impression — or maybe it’s a thought, I don’t know — that
while I do this, that I’m going to end up switching my primary aspect and
end up with a different one, and about three weeks ago I felt like something
like that has occurred, and I wondered what that is, if I’m identifying
that or if I’m distorting something else.
ELIAS: You are allowing yourself to be recognizing actions that
are occurring within you, as you are becoming more and more aware of self
and noticing your movements and familiarizing yourself with you and more
of your individual expressions.
I may express to you that you are exchanging positions of primary aspects
in several motions, in actuality. This is not isolated to one movement
or one event, so to speak. You have merely allowed yourself a recognition,
within a particular moment, of this action occurring.
But I shall express to you also that you are experimenting momentarily,
within different time frameworks, with different aspects of self in this
primary position, and allowing yourself to be moving into the expression
which is the most efficient within your focus, in the movement that you
create in addressing to this element of fear. Therefore, your impression
is correct.
DARYL: Okay. I also wanted to check with you on information
for a couple people, if I could have their essence name, family, alignment,
and orientation. The first one is Joan. (Pause)
ELIAS: Essence name, Joel; J-O-E-L. Essence family, Milumet.
DARYL: Really!
ELIAS: Alignment, Sumafi; orientation, soft.
DARYL: Really! That surprises me! I’ve actually met
a soft person! (Elias chuckles) And I guess with her, I’ll also ask,
have you been in contact with her?
ELIAS: Yes.
DARYL: Okay, I thought so. Soft, huh? Okay, the second
one is Kimbra. (Pause)
ELIAS: Essence name, Laurell; L-A-U-R-E-L-L.
DARYL: Two L’s at the end?
ELIAS: Correct.
DARYL: Okay.
ELIAS: Essence family, Tumold; alignment, Sumari.
DARYL: Sumari, okay.
ELIAS: Now; offer to me impression as to orientation.
DARYL: Soft.
ELIAS: You are correct.
DARYL: Wow. (Elias chuckles) Okay, well that’s ... because
I’ve also had the impression that I have not had a lot of relationships
with people holding the orientation of soft, especially lately.
ELIAS: You are correct, and I shall also express to you that many
individuals that hold this orientation of soft draw themselves to individuals
that are not of this orientation.
DARYL: Why is that? An attempt to fit in, or...?
ELIAS: Partially. I shall offer information concerning this
action within another engagement, for this may be a subject, so to speak,
within itself, for there is much to be offered concerning this particular
action that is created within individuals that hold this orientation of
soft.
But let me express to you briefly that individuals that hold the orientation
of soft objectively are attracted, in a manner of speaking, to other individuals
that are soft. They also experience what you may term to be a type
of recognition of kinship objectively with other individuals holding this
orientation.
But there is also an innate knowing within individuals of this orientation
that in intimacy with each other, there is a tremendous expression of mirroring
that is created in an intensity that many times may be creating of an objective
uncomfortableness, and many individuals that hold this orientation of soft,
in a manner of speaking, shy away from this type of interaction, for it
is presenting them with intense challenges.
DARYL: Hmm. ‘Cause I’ve kind of been drawn to that, but
I also know that it scares me.
ELIAS: Quite.
DARYL: But I do feel a draw towards them.
ELIAS: Yes, and this is an aspect of your knowing in relation
to your orientation. But as I have stated, I shall be offering more
information concerning this subject matter subsequently.
DARYL: Okay. Well, our time for today is up, and I feel
like I’ve got a lot to assimilate here.
ELIAS: As always!
DARYL: And I believe I can expect more assistance from you subjectively
in doing that also.
ELIAS: And you may.
DARYL: That’s good.
ELIAS: For I am always with you. To you, in tremendous affection
and great encouragement in your movement, au revoir.
DARYL: Au revoir.
Elias departs at 4:34 PM.
© 2001 Vicki Pendley/Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved
Copyright 2000 Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved.