Saturday, July 3, 2004 (Private/Phone)

Participants: Mary (Michael) and Laura (Belagia)

(Elias’ arrival time is 15 seconds.)

ELIAS: Good morning!

LAURA: Good morning!

ELIAS: And what shall we discuss?

LAURA: Let’s see; I’ve got a list here. This is the sixth appointment in a row I’ve scheduled but the first of the six that I’ve actually spoken with you. (Elias laughs) I have an idea of what’s happening on my end, but I was also wondering if you could give me some insight into that.

ELIAS: And what is your assessment?

LAURA: I do like to figure things out for myself, and I think that it was reinforcing to me that if I have a question, an issue that comes up, I can really see it for myself. It was getting very comical, over and over... I don’t mean comical, because things were going wrong for Mary. I don’t mean it like that. But on my end, my own creation, if I just focus on myself creating this, every time I had an appointment, something would happen to prevent that appointment from taking place. Then I would be thrown back onto myself — whatever questions were in my mind that day, whatever issues I thought I would be discussing with you and Mary, I then went into myself at that point.

ELIAS: And offered yourself the opportunity to be practicing, practicing paying attention to yourself and what you are doing, what you are expressing to yourself, and paying attention to your own communications.

LAURA: That’s been interesting, because if I had had that first session with you a couple of months ago, of course the things I would be interested in at that time are different than what I want to talk to you about today, because I’ve had new experiences.

ELIAS: Correct.

LAURA: I was talking to Mary today, and she was talking about this in her life and I recognized this very much; I think most humans do this. We set an event in motion, we create event and then we think we have to play out that entire event. For example, my getting a migraine, that once I trigger it — I have the belief I can trigger it or not trigger it — but once I trigger it, then I have to live it out. That’s the belief.

ELIAS: Yes.

LAURA: Mary was using the example of her pet getting sick, that once Polly got sick, there was the belief that that train is going and you just have to live out the illness until she gets better, rather than seeing that that illness is a reflection that I’m creating in each moment, or that headache is a creation in each moment.

ELIAS: Correct.

LAURA: And in my everyday life, I’ve been seeing those beliefs, that this isn’t necessarily a train in that’s set in motion that has to make it to its next stop. I can stop it here in its tracks right now.

ELIAS: Correct.

LAURA: I believe I’ve been doing that more and more. For example, I got a new kitten, and the kitten was sick. I took it to the vet, and the vet was worried that the kitten had leukemia and had infected my older cat. I started to feel sad and guilty, depressed, right there in the vet’s office, all the weight of this emotion. But right then, I just said no, I’m not going to continue along this line of thinking. I’m not going to go there. I went inside myself, I stayed in the moment, I focused on my breath and said to myself I’m going to know and trust my abilities and I’m not going to have two cats with leukemia. Then they did the test and neither cat had leukemia.

So it was interesting, because I could really feel myself going along that road, that I’m creating this sickness and these cats are going to be sick, and I could really feel myself stopping that.

ELIAS: Which is quite empowering, is it not, and very reinforcing of your own trust. I am acknowledging of you, and I may express to you, I am understanding of the challenge in paying attention in the moment. What you are presenting to yourself is the experiences of your truths.

This truth of events occurring sequentially, moving in their own course and your inability to change that before it reaches its outcome is a strongly expressed truth with many, many, many individuals. But what is empowering is to recognize that that may be one of your truths but it is not true, and that you do incorporate choices regardless and you may incorporate different influences of that truth to create different outcomes. It is not that you eliminate it, it is not that it disappears, so to speak, but that you are offering yourself your own freedom to choose and not continue in automatic responses. You are widening your awareness enough to recognize those automatic responses and choose not to be expressing them.

LAURA: That is what I’ve been noticing more and more, noticing the automatic response and then choosing another response.

ELIAS: Yes, which changes your energy. It changes the energy that you are projecting. Therefore, it also changes what you create and that alters your perception also. For as you engage different choices and you engage different actions, you alter your perception, which creates a different reality.

LAURA: We’ve noticed that lately, my husband and I. We’ve had some stuck energy for a long time in a certain project that we are working on. We’ve been stuck for years, actually, and then we decided to go backwards. We’re supposed to get a permit in order to do some construction on one of our houses. The permit, we still haven’t gotten it; we applied for it in early January. We decided to do it a different way. Instead of waiting for the permit and then doing the construction, we went ahead with the construction and then the permit will come — even though that’s illegal in a certain way. (Elias chuckles) It feels good to us to just be going along with it, and it feels like it’s really unsticking this energy because we’re trusting ourselves to not necessarily have to go along with the rules.

ELIAS: I am quite understanding. This is a significant example that you are offering to yourself in this experience, of actually choosing to incorporate doing different actions, which changes the energy and that changes the direction. Many times individuals continue to be moving in the same direction and engaging the same choices, doing the same actions, and are confused as to why they do not create what they want. But in not changing what they are doing — for they are not paying attention to what they are doing — they continue to create the same outcomes.

LAURA: I think that’s what we were doing, and now we’re changing that energy and it feels good. We both are feeling optimistic now about this project.

ELIAS: I am acknowledging of you.

LAURA: We’ve felt kind of discouraged a lot, so this is good for us to work as a team with it, too. There’s some nice energy that’s going on there.

I wanted to ask you about... I don’t even know what my question is, I’m still formulating it, but it’s something about judgment. Over 20 years ago I first started observing this phenomenon in our minds called judgment, and at that time my aim was to eliminate judgment. That proved to be very difficult.

ELIAS: (Chuckles) And perhaps even futile!

LAURA: Exactly, because here I am, 22 years later, having observed it countless times in myself, and it’s still here. It’s not as strong as it used to be, not at all, but it’s still around. I just wanted to talk about judgment. I read, I’m not sure where and I may be wrong, that an individual who has shifted is no longer judgmental. Is that accurate?

ELIAS: Somewhat; not entirely.

Now; let me express to you, I have expressed many times previously that in shifting you shall not be expressing the judgments in the manner in which you have previously. But as I have also expressed many times, you are not eliminating ANY beliefs or any belief systems. Duplicity is a belief system also. Therefore, you are not eliminating duplicity; therefore, you are not eliminating judgment. You are changing it.

Now; this is not changing a belief, and it is not changing the belief system. It is changing your perception through widening your awareness. As I have expressed from the onset of these sessions, even in being entirely shifted, so to speak, you shall continue to incorporate your preferences and your opinions.

Now; previously many individuals viewed that statement to be a contradiction in association with judgment, for opinions express judgments, and preferences also express judgments, good or bad. But what you are doing in widening your awareness and in becoming intimately familiar with yourself and generating an acceptance of self and of your beliefs, recognizing your truths and the influences of them, is that you are moving into an understanding of your own individual guidelines, which are your opinions and your preferences. These are the guidelines that you incorporate in association with your choices, with your individual behavior, what you choose to engage and what you choose not to engage.

But in the acceptance, there is a recognition that whatever your truths are, whatever your preferences are, whatever your opinions are, they are relative to you. They are not absolutes, they are not necessarily true, and therefore, they are not necessarily applicable to other individuals.

In this, as you begin to generate a genuine understanding and awareness of this within yourself, you begin to express an acceptance of difference — which is not an expression of ignoring difference or being indifferent to difference, but genuinely being accepting of difference in genuinely knowing that another individual may choose differently, may incorporate different preferences, may move in different directions and display different behaviors from yourself, and they may be of a type that you do not prefer and therefore you dislike, but you accept them. It is not necessary to be expressing agreement to express acceptance.

LAURA: I think I understand what you’re saying. I believe I’ve experienced that myself.

ELIAS: Therefore, what you shall notice in what is changing is not that you shall not incorporate any judgment of any expression at all, is not that you shall be entirely neutral, but that in association with difference you shall express some neutrality while continuing to incorporate your own preferences and your own guidelines.

The neutrality is merely expressed in the knowing that no expression, no choice, no behavior is actually right or wrong — it may be right or wrong to you, but in itself is not actually right or wrong; your assessment of right and wrong is your guideline for yourself, guiding your own behaviors and your own choices in a manner that you more prefer — and recognizing that although you would not prefer some experiences, some choices, that is not to say that they may not be beneficial to another individual, regardless of how bad you may view the choice or the experience to be.

LAURA: Would you agree with my statement that I have had experience with this?

ELIAS: Yes.

LAURA: I’m trying to gauge — what I’m feeling or thinking about that, is it accurate?

ELIAS: Yes.

LAURA: I’m not deluding myself? (Laughs)

ELIAS: No, and this is an evidence to yourself of your own process of widening your awareness also, that you recognize that you do continue to incorporate some judgments but those judgments are more associated with your preferences or your lack of preferences and are not as strongly expressed as they have been previously in association with other individuals.

LAURA: I can see that. Is there any information that would be helpful to me at this time in that area that would be beneficial for me to hear?

ELIAS: I may express to you, what is somewhat more challenging than acceptance of differences with other individuals may be the expression of acceptance within yourself in association with judgments. For...

LAURA: I’m harder on myself than I am on others.

ELIAS: Yes, and that is significant. In this, in this time framework, it is significant that you allow yourself to pay attention to what you are doing continuously, for that is your indicator as to what type of energy you are projecting, and that is quite significant. For remember, in this wave, your truths are being presented experientially, not intellectually. This is the reason that it is important to pay attention to what you are actually doing.

LAURA: Then in my process right now of accepting myself, having that sincere intent to do that, is that being manifested in my life by that ability I’m having now to stop in the middle of a train of thought and say I’m going to know and trust rather than continuing with a victim mentality or a worry train of thought? To notice, to stop, stay in the moment, is that...? What am I asking?

ELIAS: Yes. (Chuckles)

LAURA: Okay, thank you! (Laughs) I usually don’t have a problem expressing myself. I think I’m hitting some of my core issues, and it gets hard to talk about it somehow.

ELIAS: But you are accomplishing, and you are offering yourself more of an awareness of your abilities and more of a trust in your choices, recognizing that although you may be experiencing some of your truths, they are not actually true. Therefore, you are not locked into an automatic response of being a victim, for you do incorporate mobility and allow yourself to choose different directions, different expressions and different actions, which is being evidenced in your construction also.

LAURA: I think that in the past when I’ve been going down a certain road, and it’s a very difficult road and it’s intense, stressful, I’ve been able to know in sort of big dramatic situations that I’ve created to stop and see that I’ve created this and I have choices. Now the difference is I’m seeing it in common everyday occurrences. Not that I didn’t see it before, but now I see it more and more, and really consciously stopping and saying I have a choice here, I have many choices here...

ELIAS: Correct, and this is the point.

LAURA: ...even in these little common everyday occurrences.

ELIAS: Yes, and this is the point. Which is quite significant, for this is the area in which you offer yourself your genuine freedom, and you genuinely experience your own power and your own significance, and how you yourself can and do manipulate energy to be generating the types of productions that you want rather than expressing automatic responses and generating what you do not want.

LAURA: I would say, looking at my life, I have an easy, enjoyable, peaceful life. I’m aware that I’ve created a life that is much different than many people create, and I’m really satisfied with that.

At the same time — maybe I’m too particular — my daughter and I have had a little bit of tension. I think we have a great relationship; we laugh together, and we snuggle together and have a lot of fun together. But one of the things I see with us — and as we are talking, I’m aware of my wanting to project it out onto her what I am creating, and maybe I need to admit this to myself — I’m creating that we butt heads. We get in these very emotional exchanges. Well, I’m kind of exaggerating. If I look at my past, it’s not really that emotional, so maybe I’m not generating as much emotion in extreme being reflected in our relationship as I used to. But I’m still noticing; there’s something going on there. It is so hard for me to express myself today, Elias! Now I’ve babbled on about that, do you have any...?

ELIAS: And in these scenarios, what are you doing?

LAURA: When she starts going at me in a blaming fashion, that I haven’t done something right or there’s emotional drama, I notice I tense up, I want it to stop right now, I’m not accepting it at all, I don’t like it, I want to push it away. That’s my inner response. What I actually do is sometimes I can get it together and sort of do like reflective listening and conflict resolution kind of thing. Other times I just feel angry and say, “Stop treating me this way, just stop it now!” That’s what I do.

ELIAS: I am understanding, but what are you projecting that is creating this type of reflection? That is the point. For what you...

LAURA: Right, I know I’m not seeing it because I’m still reflecting it on almost a daily basis.

ELIAS: What you are projecting is defensiveness. If you are projecting defensiveness, if you are defending of yourself even without verbal communication, if you are projecting a defensive energy you shall be reflecting that to yourself in conflict and in blame.

LAURA: Defensive, that has been one of my issues that I have been observing. So there is something inside me that feels it needs to be defended, some aspect of self. Is that it?

ELIAS: Yes, that you are not quite good enough yet. This would also be associated with what you began this conversation with in relation to your headaches and this truth that once a process is begun it must run its course and produce its outcome.

In this, you are within a process, and you do not view yourself or believe that you have reached your outcome yet. Therefore, you are incomplete in your process and you have not achieved the goal, which is acceptance. Therefore, you are not quite adequate enough yet, but you will be when you complete your process.

Now; this is that same truth, which is not true. Your outcomes are occurring in every moment — your process is an outcome. There is no finished product. Therefore, it is a matter of acceptance in each moment.

Acceptance is not the brass ring that you achieve at the end of your journey and then continue within the rest of your focus in this enlightened state of acceptance. That negates choice. Acceptance is an action that you generate in each moment. It is its own outcome in each moment within your process. Therefore, the process itself is a continuous outcome.

LAURA: There was a person on the Elias List who posted that he had been informed that he had fully shifted.

ELIAS: No, this is incorrect.

LAURA: That got confusing to me, and I think I reflected it as a way to reinforce this whole belief...

ELIAS: Yes.

LAURA: ...that there’s a point where one becomes fully shifted, and that that is another form of enlightenment, this sort of ideal of nirvana. When I was practicing Zen, it did hit me at one point that enlightenment is not a finished product, that you can only be enlightened in moments.

ELIAS: Correct.

LAURA: So I decided that's not for me anymore. But that’s my belief and that’s my tendency, and then I take the Elias information and I’m not going to worry about being enlightened but I’ll worry about being shifted now.

ELIAS: (Laughs) Therefore, you changed the term but the meaning remains the same.

LAURA: Right, that’s me, my aim is to perfect myself. That’s part of my whole belief.

ELIAS: Ah, and that is another truth and...

LAURA: I know and I’ve seen it. I know intellectually that there’s nothing to perfect, and sometimes I know it deep, deep inside. In other moments I choose to be perfectionistic about myself...

ELIAS: I am understanding.

LAURA: ...and I continue it in each moment.

ELIAS: Yes, and that is the point, is what you do in the moment, what you generate in the moment and what you are projecting in the moment.

I may express to you that I am aware of the individual that you are referring to. I have interacted with that individual and have explained that the individual incorporated a shifting experience but has not entirely shifted. That was a strong misunderstanding.

I may express to you also that in recognizing these truths, do not ensnare yourself in discounting yourself or judging yourself that you should not incorporate these truths or that they are bad, for they also incorporate other influences that are motivating and that inspire you. It is merely a matter of which influences you choose, whether you choose to be defensive at not being completed or whether you choose to be expressing confidence and inspiration that you are not completed, and therefore you are continuing to explore and discover and generate the adventure, and that there is no completion. For if there is completion, what more shall you explore and what would be the point? But as you are continuously expanding, you are continuously discovering, which is exciting and needs no defense.

In each moment, you already are the perfect mother.

LAURA: (Laughs) You’re so good at hitting the nail on the head, Elias!

ELIAS: Therefore, offer yourself permission to not defend yourself, for you already are the perfect mother.

LAURA: (Laughing) Except in that moment over there I wasn’t the perfect mother! Oh my god, there’s that moment over there — that wasn’t perfect!

ELIAS: Ah, but in that moment, it was. (Chuckles) It may not have been your preference, but it was perfectly you in that moment.

LAURA: Everything is perfect as it is and as it is not.

ELIAS: Correct. (Laura sighs) Let me express to you, this moves in the area of value.

Now; within yourself, removing any other individual, within yourself in a creation in a moment that is uncomfortable, do you not value that experience? Did you not value the experience that you created with your feline?

LAURA: I did value that experience.

ELIAS: It was not comfortable, but did you not offer yourself an empowerment? Therefore, it was valuable. Therefore, it was perfect in that moment. Therefore, YOU were perfect in that moment in your discovery.

Now; if you may value that uncomfortable experience and value yourself in what you allowed yourself in trust and empowerment of yourself, why shall you be defensive of yourself as a mother?

LAURA: That’s the area I’m hard on myself, that one.

ELIAS: I am aware.

LAURA: I even said that the other day, because she was just nagging at me. I turned and I said, “I am a good mommy!” But I’m trying to convince myself, of course.

ELIAS: Correct.

LAURA: She’s just reflecting my own defensiveness. It’s becoming more clear.

ELIAS: Now as you practice not being defensive and as you practice acknowledging yourself and appreciating yourself in this role that you have chosen, you shall reflect that rather than the conflict.

LAURA: Mary said something this morning that I think speaks to this, too. She just went through a difficult experience with her dog, Polly, being sick and having to really see her reflection there, but she also noticed that most of the time Polly is a happy-go-lucky dog, and that’s also her reflection.

ELIAS: Correct.

LAURA: So I need to see that most of the time my kids are really happy, and we enjoy each other very much.

ELIAS: And that is a reflection of your energy.

LAURA: I get perfectionistic, thinking if I was really a good mother, I would be reflecting that all the time.

ELIAS: (Chuckles) Ah, and thusly you would be creating your utopia and nirvana!

LAURA: Nirvana and a fully enlightened, glowing being!

ELIAS: Let me express to you, in what you would term to be a fully shifted individual, if they are continuing to participate within this physical reality, this is not to say that they shall never incorporate conflict. The difference is that they shall know and understand what they are creating while they are creating it, and know that their intention is to be creating it to experience it or to be exploring some other expression and generating another new discovery.

All of your reality shall not be bliss in shifting, for you continue to create within the blueprint of this physical reality. You choose experiences to expand your exploration. Not all of the experiences that you create are comfortable, but they are valuable for they enhance your exploration. They expand it, what you view to be the good and the bad. Also at times, just as you incorporate more of an extreme at times of excitement or joy, for this generates flavor and spice in your reality, you also generate some extremes of conflict or frustration or sorrow or irritation, for those also at times generate more flavor and spice within your experiences.

LAURA: I think I’m recognizing this. Sometimes I think I do intend to create conflict. I know what I’m creating, I know why I’m creating it, and I’m accepting of it.

ELIAS: Yes, which is another evidence of widening your awareness and shifting.

LAURA: I don’t know if I’d put my finger on it before this. Just when you were talking, I thought oh, I’ve had that experience.

ELIAS: Yes, which is the point.

LAURA: And that occurs at the time. Later on, I may reflect on it and be hard on myself, discount my creation. I’ve had that experience of feeling very vibrant in the moment of conflict...

ELIAS: Yes.

LAURA: ...and fulfilled in the moment of it, but later, upon reflection, I discount my creation.

ELIAS: Correct. That is associated with your beliefs of appropriate and inappropriate behavior, which is also associated with this same truth of attaining to the final goal. View in that type of scenario, once again, how perfectly you create in that moment. You are aware of what you are doing, you are aware of your intention, you allow your expression, and you are accepting of what you are doing.

LAURA: At the time, yes.

ELIAS: Correct.

LAURA: I’m very much in the moment at the time.

ELIAS: Correct, which is the point.

LAURA: When I am in the moment of it, maybe I’ll notice it, and later when I start discounting, maybe I’ll be more aware and stop myself from discounting.

ELIAS: For in that moment as you are projecting pastly and generating a judgment of that past event, allow yourself to recall what you actually were generating in that past event, that you were in the moment, you were aware in the now, and therefore change that judgment of discounting to an acknowledgment. This is the point of acceptance and the reason that acceptance is not an action that you achieve and thusly it continues from whence on. For as I have stated, that negates choice.

Now; your preferences change. In one moment, you may incorporate a preference that may influence you to generate that type of expression of intentionally creating a conflict and being accepting of that expression in that moment. But as your preferences change in different moments, in another moment your preference may not be to express in that manner. This is an enlightened example. (Laughs) For in the next moment, in which you are beginning to generate the judgment of the previous event, recognize first of all the acknowledgment of the previous event, your awareness in the moment, your objective choice and intention to be creating that, your expression of acceptance in that moment, and also recognize that in this now moment, your preference may be different. But in this moment, you are not creating that.

LAURA: You don’t have to stay on that train once you’ve set it in motion.

ELIAS: Therefore, you are acknowledging of both moments, for you are acknowledging of your acceptance in the previous moment and you are acknowledging that you are moving in accordance with your preference in this moment also, for in this moment you are not generating the conflict and it is not your preference.

LAURA: Not stopping conflict because it’s bad...

ELIAS: Correct.

LAURA: ...but stopping it when you’re ready to stop it, having knowledge and acknowledgment about it, and accepting all of it.

ELIAS: And recognizing that perhaps when you are recalling a previous conflict, as we have been discussing, in that moment you may not be generating any conflict. Therefore, you may be acknowledging that in the present moment you are also in alignment with your present preference of not wanting to be generating conflict, and you are not.

LAURA: This is key, right here. (Elias chuckles) We have about three minutes left, I think. I’m just very grateful for this day today, Elias. I feel like we’ve hit on those little harder-to-see things for me, those little moments that occur on a day-to-day basis. That’s where my interest really is.

ELIAS: Which I am understanding, and that is significant. I have expressed many times to many individuals, what you do in each day, the beliefs that influence the actions and the choices that you incorporate in each day are the same that influence what you term to be the large events within your experiences. This is the reason that it is significant to be paying attention to what you are actually doing in what you would term to be a mundane day, for those choices and actions and projections are the same as what occurs in large events that create conflict. You merely express them in more intensity in certain moments and generate more of a drama or more of an intensity of conflict or confusion, but they are the same beliefs that you reinforce each day.

LAURA: I have one last question about this fully-shifted idea. The fully-shifted idea, I’m getting it would be beneficial to me to put that idea away and just focus on this moment now, this moment now, this moment now, and put that whole idea away.

ELIAS: Yes, for that is the manner in which you fully shift, is to be generating that knowing and awareness now. In one moment, you may be fully shifted, and in another moment, you may not. The point is to generate the awareness that allows you to be intentionally creating what you want in each moment, and in that, move into that being of fully shifted — but that occurs in the moment. It is not a goal that you attain to. It is a process. Remember, the outcomes are in every moment; the process itself is an outcome.

LAURA: I thank you very much, Elias, from the bottom of my heart.

ELIAS: You are very welcome, my friend. I shall be anticipating our next meeting.

LAURA: Hopefully I’ll be able to create what I want more efficiently. (Elias laughs) No, wait — I will KNOW what I’m creating.

ELIAS: And appreciate! (Chuckles) I express tremendous affection to you, my friend, as always, and great encouragement. I am acknowledging of your progress in your process. Ha ha ha! To you in great lovingness, au revoir.

LAURA: Au revoir.

Elias departs after 1 hour, 4 minutes.

©2007 Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved

---

Copyright 2004 Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved.