Monday, November 18, 2002 (Private/Phone)

Participants: Mary (Michael) and Seale (Seale)

Elias arrives at 2:29 PM. (Arrival time is 17 seconds.)

ELIAS: Good morning!

SEALE: Good morning.

ELIAS: And how shall we proceed?

SEALE: I have a couple of questions that I want clarification or confirmation from you, and then I’ll talk to you about some things, since when I looked at my E-notes there weren’t any questions. (Elias laughs) I guess I’m playing today.

Bridgy had a question; let me see if I can read this. It’s about her and her son and the focus of Che Guevara. She wanted to know if that is a focus of Karsten or her, or what her connection is with that focus. Karsten is her son, right?

ELIAS: The connection is a friend.

SEALE: This Che Guevara is a friend of hers?

ELIAS: Yes.

SEALE: And no connection to her son?

ELIAS: Also a friend.

SEALE: Thank you very much!

ELIAS: You are welcome.

SEALE: Then the Romanov family — we have been dealing with trying to figure out who’s who in that. Bridgy thinks that she’s Anastasia and that Ken is the Tsar Nicholas II, I’m Olga, and I forget if Alexei or however you pronounce that might be Sandy, and Tatiana is Anjuli. So can you confirm any of those or whatever?

ELIAS: Correct.

SEALE: All of them are correct?

ELIAS: Yes.

SEALE: Oh cool! Something came up the other day. A German guy came and was talking to me about using Golden Seal, and all of a sudden it struck me. I didn’t even get it at first and then it’s like pay attention, pay attention. But I don’t know what I’m supposed to pay attention to about that. I had been asking about the hit-and-run car, the color of it, and I came up with yellow. I wondered if the Golden Seal part had to do with that, or why that came up, or why I was connecting with that or noticing that.

ELIAS: Yes, your impression is correct.

SEALE: That it’s a yellow vehicle?

ELIAS: Yes.

SEALE: Well, then I don’t understand, because the parts of the car that they have are not from a big huge car. It’s a sport vehicle. My first impression when I heard that was that the car they’re talking about hit the person after he was already hurt or dead or gone, because that’s the only thing that makes sense because they have pieces of that make of car.

ELIAS: And your question?

SEALE: That car isn’t this yellow car, I mean vehicle, because that car isn’t as big as the one that I heard, a big one with backup things, the beep, beep, beep. This is a really big vehicle, the yellow thing, and their vehicle is a sport vehicle. So am I correct about that?

ELIAS: In the involvement of two vehicles, yes.

SEALE: So the other car hit him or the parts were left after he was already dead? Are they wrong about the parts?

ELIAS: Not necessarily disengaged yet.

SEALE: So he was hit twice?

ELIAS: Yes.

SEALE: Oh no! (Pause) But the first one was the yellow vehicle, yeah?

ELIAS: Yes.

SEALE: I got the impression that the yellow vehicle was so big that they didn’t even know that they hit him.

ELIAS: Correct.

SEALE: Did the other ones know?

ELIAS: Yes.

SEALE: Because that’s why they left their parts, so they do know. Oh no, so he was still alive... Oh gee.

What else can I do to help? Because I don’t know if that’s enough. I met the father. At first I was saying maybe I should just leave it alone, but then I met the father at breakfast and it’s like no, no, no. He was asking about that, the not knowing. So this must be a creation for me to follow up on or I’m creating this so that I will follow up on it.

ELIAS: And to trust yourself and your impressions.

SEALE: Yeah, that’s true. Because if nobody believed me I don’t even know if I want to go through with this.

I was trying to think of what kind of yellow vehicle. Are we talking dump truck?

ELIAS: This is not the point. You are continuing to move in the direction of attempting to fix and this is not the point. The point of the movement that you are generating is to allow yourself to trust your impressions regardless of whether they objectively incorporate what you term to be sense to yourself or not, for it is objective imagery and it is abstract. In this, the imagery itself is not the point and is not important.

What is important is that you allow yourself to listen to your impressions and to trust your expression, to not doubt your expression and to not incorporate discounting of yourself or fear in association with the responses of other individuals.

Seale, what you are generating in this time framework with this experience is an opportunity for you to be addressing to a fear that you generate in association with other individuals and what you perceive as how they perceive you, and in this to allow yourself to address to your beliefs and your influences which generate that fear. And this shall allow you greater freedom.

You are moving in a specific direction, of which you are aware, in engaging your inner senses, your communications, your impressions with yourself, and allowing yourself to be more freely expressive of yourself. This has been your obstacle in what you term to be the past, concerning yourself with the perceptions of other individuals and attempting to change or alter the perceptions of other individuals, and this is not the point. This is the reason that you are presenting to yourself this type of experience now, to allow yourself to be expressive in a different manner in which you are not concerning yourself with other individuals.

SEALE: And that’s why I chose to do the thing with the Seahawks too, right?

ELIAS: Yes.

SEALE: Because they’re already losing and I know that. I wanted to play with the energy to see if I really could do it. I mean, that was me trusting myself, testing myself I guess, in a way to see if I really can do it.

ELIAS: Correct.

SEALE: I recognized that’s what the fear was. That is my way of facing it, to put myself out there, because that really does feel fearful, what people will say or do if they don’t win or whatever. That’s the weird part too. I knew that the Angels were going to win. I knew that was like a sure thing, but in this thing with the Seahawks, it’s not like that. It’s more like it can go either way and I’m really seeing if I can create it. Before with the Angels, I already knew they were going to win without a doubt. But this thing with the Seahawks, it’s not that way. It’s not like it is a sure thing.

ELIAS: And this is what is significant for you to be observing within yourself, the difference between an expression of incorporating no doubt, allowing yourself to relax within your expressions and your trust of yourself, and time frameworks in which you do not express that.

SEALE: Okay, but to me it felt like different parts of me. It’s like I already saw that the Angels were going to win, like that was a knowing thing, like being in the future or something, whereas with this I’m in a different space. It feels like a different time-space. I’m at the part at the beginning of the creation rather than seeing it from an already completed creation. Does that make sense?

ELIAS: Yes, and therefore offering yourself the opportunity to view the process and the snares within the process.

SEALE: Okay, this’ll be fun. Do you remember when we talked a long time ago about what my intent was, and it was translating? I don’t know the exact words, but it was kind of like translating the energy. Was that correct?

ELIAS: And your question?

SEALE: I just wanted to make sure that that’s what it was, that that’s what I came here to do.

ELIAS: In your method of exploration, yes. (Pause)

SEALE: And that’s it?

ELIAS: Express to myself in this present now, Seale, which direction do you choose to be incorporating in our conversation? For I incorporate an awareness of a scatteredness within your energy and several directions occurring simultaneously, which is generating some confusion.

SEALE: (Laughing) Yeah, you got that loud and clear! And that’s what I think I’ve been feeling, too, for the last month. Gosh, on the one hand I want to have a relationship with Ed. I mean, I want to create that and I see that I am doing that. There’s been a lot of struggle, but part of that has to be with me not even recognizing that I am getting there because I think the process feels so hard or my expectation of the process, whichever. Then on the other hand, I feel like by doing that I’m losing or I’m restricting myself in ways I don’t know that I want to go.

I mean, there’s like two parts to me, the part that really wants to have the relationship with Ed in working together, being best friends and being intimate and all that, but then there is the other part that I want to be doing what I need to be doing about translating the energy, or like my beliefs, or doing things with the animals or the dolphins, and I haven’t been able to do both. It’s like either/or stuff.

ELIAS: And what do you perceive generates that? What influences that separation in which you restrict yourself and you view that you cannot accomplish both actions?

SEALE: Probably that fear, because he doesn’t see that. It’s so threatening to him that I kind of just put that aside, I guess. Or I’m trying to create some kind of safety in the relationship or comfortableness or something and then be willing to do the other part. I mean, I’m doing a little more now. It’s like waiting, not wanting to feel like I have to have one or the other or that I’m going to lose one in order to have the other.

ELIAS: Therefore what are you denying within yourself and your choices and your freedom now?

SEALE: What am I denying within myself?

ELIAS: Yes.

SEALE: Well, not trusting me, obviously.

ELIAS: And what is the greatest influence that you perceive in relation to not trusting yourself? Where is your attention?

SEALE: Oh, I know — outside of myself! (Elias laughs) I mean, I know that. I recognize that. It’s like I feel like a dang yoyo. I bounce in, bounce out, bounce in, bounce out. I’m getting down to some pretty deep fear about being myself. (Elias nods in agreement) I can see that. I can see from how Ed responds how deep that fear is in me.

ELIAS: And what direction shall you incorporate to be addressing to this fear?

SEALE: A direction? I thought I was doing that by doing the Seahawks thing, in trying to look and see what I’m choosing in the moment and why I’m choosing it. Because I’m starting to do that again, too, become more focused on that.

ELIAS: Have you incorporated the action of reading and attempting to assimilate the information that was offered within the recent group session?

SEALE: What? Sorry, I missed that.

ELIAS: Have you allowed yourself to incorporate the information that was offered in the recent group session?

SEALE: Oh no, I haven’t even read that transcript.

ELIAS: Very well. I offer you the suggestion that you allow yourself to incorporate that, for this is what we shall be discussing in this conversation also.

SEALE: I saw that it came out and I’m planning to read it, yes.

ELIAS: In this, I am aware that you and I continue to discuss very similar subjects in each of our conversations, and I express very similar information to you and identifications of actions to you in each of our conversations. I am also aware of the direction that you incorporate in association with our conversations. Certain information has been repeated to the point that you generate an automatic response each time the information is repeated.

SEALE: My automatic response is what?

ELIAS: The automatic response is I shall offer you an identification of the action of projecting your attention outside of yourself and attempting to offer yourself validation concerning your abilities through an objective manifestation, which is projecting your attention outside of yourself, and each time that I express this information to you, you generate an automatic response in blocking that information.

You express the outward response in language to myself, “Yes, yes, yes, I am aware. I know. I am projecting my attention, BUT...” And in the moment that you incorporate that term “but,” your attention moves. You generate an automatic response of resistance and moving the conversation in a different direction, not actually addressing to what is meant by projecting your attention outside of yourself.

SEALE: And I have fear about that, obviously. I think I came in contact with. I mean, I understand that. That’s my conflict and I’m recognizing that better, right?

ELIAS: Yes.

SEALE: Okay, so now I’m less confused because I see what I’m choosing. I’m allowing myself to see little glimmers of that. Like when I looked at Ed and I said, “Aha, that’s me. What am I so fearful about or why am I so resistant?”

ELIAS: Correct, and this is and has been your movement, so to speak, closer and closer to the identification of this fear and your movement through these experiences and through these conversations that you and I have engaged to the recognition that you do incorporate this fear and the magnitude of it, that you may begin incorporating steps to address to this fear and actually turn your attention to yourself.

The greatest expression of this fear is your doubt of your ability to incorporate that action in itself of actually turning your attention and incorporating a genuine understanding of what that action is in moving your attention to yourself and not concerning yourself any longer with the perceptions or the expressions of other individuals, not attempting to be generating what may be viewed as psychic parlor tricks that shall prove your abilities to yourself and to other individuals — which in actuality does not prove the expression to you. For regardless of what you allow yourself to generate in objective imagery, you continue to express a doubt of whether you are actually incorporating accuracy or whether you yourself are actually manipulating that energy to be creating the objective imagery.

More so, you move in these types of expressions to prove to other individuals that you incorporate an ability. For the continuation of attempting to prove to other individuals merely reinforces your doubt of yourself within you and that perpetuates the fear. And rather than address to the fear directly, previously you have chosen to continue to project your attention outwardly in the attempt to be generating this proving in association with other individuals and therefore attempt to be altering their perception and offering yourself an expression of validation of your value, for you shall acquire that from other individuals if they are accepting of you.

Now; I may express to you, this is not uncommon, but you are moving now into a position in which you are allowing yourself to view that underlyingly, the motivation of all of these actions that you are incorporating is associated with this expression of fear. Now you have allowed yourself to begin to recognize that expression and the existence of it within yourself, and now you begin a readiness, regardless of the fearfulness, to allow yourself to begin to move your attention.

SEALE: That’s true. I understand that’s true. But I don’t think I understood before just how big that fear was or I couldn’t put it into words, because that fear is huge!

ELIAS: I am recognizing. I may express to you, what you have been engaging in your discussions with myself, and all of these actions that you have incorporated objectively outwardly in which you project your attention outside of yourself, have been quite purposeful. Therefore, do not incorporate judgment in relation to these actions, for these actions have allowed you a manner in which you may view this expression of fear and begin to assimilate the information that you and I have been discussing.

SEALE: So when you say “address the fear,” what is the process of doing that? I mean, I still don’t know why that fear is so big. I can’t express that in words or why I have that fear.

ELIAS: You have been incorporating this energy and this manifestation of this fear for an extended time framework within your focus.

SEALE: Oh right, you mean for many, many years.

ELIAS: Yes.

SEALE: Why am I doing this? Why do I have it?

ELIAS: For you, in your terms, base your value upon the expressions and the acceptance of other individuals, and you generate the reverse of the genuine expression of acceptance.

You do not acquire acceptance from other individuals. You generate acceptance within yourself, and subsequent to your expression of generating that acceptance within yourself, you project that energy outwardly and thusly reflect it to yourself objectively through other individuals. But you continue to generate difficulty, conflict, challenges and the lack of acceptance reflected to you through other individuals for you are not generating it within yourself, and therefore you reflect what you project in energy.

But the action of incorporating acceptance of yourself has been blocked by this energy of fear. Therefore, in a manner of speaking it has been necessary for you to move yourself into a direction in which you allowed yourself to view this fear and notice and recognize the presence of that fear. This offers you the opportunity to be addressing to this energy and to allow yourself the freedom of your choices, which shall allow you to genuinely move your attention to yourself and thusly generate a genuine acceptance of yourself.

Once incorporating that acceptance of yourself, you shall no longer concern yourself with the expressions and choices of other individuals, for you shall genuinely recognize that you reflect what you project outwardly. Therefore, you shall allow yourself to create what you want in an expression of essence and without judgment and without justification and without approval of other individuals.

In the moment that you allow yourself to move into that type of expression, you shall offer yourself the approval of other individuals which you have sought for an extended time framework. The difference shall be that you shall not seek it. It shall merely be offered to you as a natural reflection of what you are projecting. In this, it shall not actually be an expression of approval, although you may interpret it in this manner, but rather an expression of acceptance from other individuals as a reflection of your acceptance of yourself. But the initial movement is to be addressing to this fear.

SEALE: And the process is?

ELIAS: The beginning movement of the process is to be acknowledging its existence and that you are generating this and that it is not a response or a reaction to outside scenarios. It is an expression that is generated within you.

Now; once you are genuinely allowing yourself to view this and to recognize that this is your own creation, you may move into the next step of your process and discontinue generating conflict with the fear. What I am expressing to you in this is to discontinue fighting with yourself, to not generate fighting with this expression of fear, and to discontinue forcing yourself in the attempt to push it away from your objective recognition.

In this, as you discontinue forcing your energy, you discontinue fighting with this expression of fear and attempting to reconfigure it into some other expression of which it is not. You shall begin to relax your energy, recognizing that this energy exists. It is an expression of you. It is unnecessary to force it, it is unnecessary to alter it, and recognizing that although it exists and is being generated, you continue to hold choices.

Now; this also requires movement of your attention genuinely in the now. It is movement of your attention in both expressions simultaneously, holding your attention upon self and holding your attention in the now together, recognizing the moments in which your attention drifts.

SEALE: I’m starting to do that already?

ELIAS: I am aware.

SEALE: That was really a question.

ELIAS: Yes, recognizing the moments in which you allow your attention to drift to your thoughts, and your thoughts are focusing outside of the now or are focusing outside of yourself or both, which many times is the situation.

SEALE: Yes, because I have recognized that, too. That’s my way of avoiding the fear, or what I think you say is transfiguring the fear or the energy into something else.

ELIAS: Correct, which is unsuccessful is it not?

SEALE: (Laughing) Well right, that’s why I’m talking to you about it!

ELIAS: I am understanding. For you do not dissipate the fear and you do not reconfigure it into another expression of energy. You merely distract yourself and project your attention in a different direction. But...

SEALE: It’s getting louder.

ELIAS: Correct. For your desire, my friend, is to allow yourself freedom. Your desire is to be assimilating this information, for you incorporate a knowing within you that this is the key to the expression of your freedom, and this is a tremendous desire that you incorporate. Therefore, those expressions of energy that generate obstacles in relation to your desire are becoming louder, for you wish to be addressing to these expressions and dissipating them that you may actually generate this genuine freedom.

SEALE: Right now in this moment, I guess I feel safe with you, because it feels like almost overwhelming, the fear is so great. I feel the tears in my eyes that I won’t be able to handle it.

ELIAS: I am understanding.

SEALE: Do you know what I mean?

ELIAS: Yes, I am understanding. This is the significance of holding your attention within the now genuinely and actually noticing and paying attention to what is being generated in the now, for this allows you to dissipate the feeling of that overwhelmingness of that energy of fear. For as you incorporate the feeling of that fear and you are paying attention to yourself, for you are paying attention to that feeling of that fear, you may also incorporate the awareness of the now.

Your attention is not bound to singularity. Attention may incorporate many actions simultaneously and focus clearly within them. You may be expressing the awareness of this fear and you may also allow yourself to pay attention to the now. Recognize what is actually occurring in the now. This is tremendously significant and important, for in that recognition of the now is volumes of information.

In this, as you are experiencing this energy of fear and you recognize the now, you may evaluate what is actually occurring now that is generating this intensity of fear.

SEALE: Help me with that right this moment. I know part of that is the safety, admitting it with you because it feels too overwhelming to be handling it in the now.

ELIAS: And this is what I am expressing to you of the significance of paying attention to the now.

Very well, let us examine this very expression. You express to myself this overwhelmingness and this exposure of expressing to myself this fearfulness and the lack of or partially the recognition of safety.

Now; the fear continues. You acknowledge the presence of that energy. What is actually occurring in this now? Am I expressing any threateningness in energy to you?

SEALE: No.

ELIAS: Correct. Am I expressing any responsiveness to you that your expression is unacceptable?

SEALE: No.

ELIAS: Correct. Am I projecting any energy to you in this now which may feel unsafe?

SEALE: No.

ELIAS: No. Correct. Therefore, what is actually occurring in this now that generates this threateningness and this overwhelmingness?

The identification of that is an anticipation, not what is actually occurring but an anticipation of what may be occurring — that you may be unsafe, that you may be threatened, that there may be a lack of acceptance. But in this now, those are not the expressions that are actually occurring. This...

SEALE: All that is based on when it actually did happen when I was much younger?

ELIAS: No, my friend. You have continued these types of expressions of fear, in your terms, for many years, and they are associated with each now. It is merely a familiar expression within yourself, and you have not allowed yourself to this point to address to this expression. You have continued to attempt to force it away or distract yourself and therefore not address to it, but you continue to generate it.

This is what I am expressing to you and have previously also, my friend. You do not generate one experience and then ever after continue an association with that one experience. You generate an experience and you may generate similar experiences subsequent, but one experience does not continue ever after. It is generated in a moment, there is an outcome in a moment, and each experience subsequent to that is its own unique experience.

There are associations that individuals generate concerning similar experiences, and this is the manner in which you begin to generate absolutes within your associations and discounting yourselves and expressing to yourselves the doubt of your ability. For you view experiences in similarities or what may be termed to be patterns, and you discount yourselves and you express, “I have created this previously and the likelihood to be creating it again is great.” This is what creates your shrines. You continue to add the jewels to the shrines in generating these similarities of experiences and continuing to discount yourselves.

In this, you have created a wondrous shrine in association with this fear, but you do not allow yourself to unlock it. You hold it in tremendous guard. In allowing yourself to unlock that door, so to speak — not to unleash a monster but merely to peer into the door — and knowing that as you stand upon the other side of the door you are safe and you are not threatened, it is safely contained behind the door.

You have generated tremendous precaution and guard to insure this energy of fear is strongly barriered between your attention and it. Therefore, as this barrier has been incorporated in tremendous strength, you may allow yourself in increments to merely turn the key and merely crack the door and merely peer into the door in small increments, reinforcing yourself in the now that you have not crossed the threshold, that you are safe, that there is no harmfulness which is befalling you in this now and there is no threat — the demon is barriered.

As you continue to crack the door in small increments, you allow small expressions of light to view this demon. As you continue and you allow yourself to view it, it becomes smaller and smaller and less and less fearful and less and less offensive, for you express more and more trust of yourself, which is the empowerment of your strength. As you offer yourself the recognition of your strength, the energy of the fear seems smaller and smaller and less and less threatening. The demon that once appeared to be enormous and fanged becomes quite small and incorporates no teeth, and therefore has no bite.

SEALE: Well, I think our time is up. I really appreciate... I’m not confused any more and I feel much more peaceful, even though I also really feel the fear, too.

ELIAS: Let me express to you, my dear friend, each moment that you are aware of this fearfulness, allow yourself to incorporate my energy, for I shall freely offer it to you and I shall be present. You may wrap my energy around you as a blanket of safety and I shall be with you.

SEALE: Okay, I really appreciate that.

ELIAS: This may be helpful to you in this process that you are engaging. I may express to you my acknowledgment. As you may experience this fearfulness, I am acknowledging of you in your bravery to be addressing to it.

SEALE: (Emotionally) Okay, thank you very much.

ELIAS: You are very welcome, my friend. I extend to you my invitation to be engaging conversation with myself in any time framework. I am always available to you and my energy is continuously with you.

SEALE: And now I’ll be able to do this, I know. I really do appreciate it. It would be too scary for me without your energy. It’ll just make it easier for me and I really appreciate that, that I don’t have to struggle so much and feel by myself to do it.

ELIAS: You are not alone. I am continuously with you and offering acceptance and no threateningness. I offer to you my affection and my encouragement. Hold my energy with you, my friend, and it shall be a shield.

SEALE: I’m looking forward to talking to you next time, and we can discuss how far I have had movement.

ELIAS: Very well, and I incorporate no doubt of your accomplishment. To you in tremendous lovingness and support, au revoir.

SEALE: Au revoir.

Elias departs at 3:33 PM.

(1) Elias is referring to the 10/26/02.

©2005 Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved

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Copyright 2002 Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved.