Thursday, March 21, 2002 (Private/Phone)
Participants: Mary (Michael) and KC (Nanaiis)
Elias arrives at 12:43 PM. (Arrival time is 25 seconds.)

ELIAS: Good morning!

KC: Good morning, Elias! Oh my goodness, I almost asked you how you were! (Both laugh) It’s so automatic, you know?

I just called you for an excuse to call you. I do have a list of Sumafi questions. It’s been a long time since I talked to you, and I was missing you. (Elias laughs)

I also want to ask some questions for Bridgy. She doesn’t speak English, and so since a lot of my questions were the same as her questions, I told her that I would be glad to ask them.

ELIAS: Very well.

KC: Is that okay?

ELIAS: Very well.

KC: I’d like to ask her questions in two parts. Her first one, I’ll just read you what she writes because remember she doesn’t really speak English. She fragmented and her alignment changed from Vold to Ilda, and she is curious about her intent in alignment with this new Ilda family. Here’s what she writes:

’How can I express the change to Ilda? Is there any vision which can be expressed in a playful manner, and in which kind of art is good to do it - painting, writing, dance, music, or as a therapist? My tendency now is to choose more of an artistic expression. Elias, please explain to me more about the possibilities to which I am more predestined. Is there any energy lending of other focuses of Thelma which can be helpful in that?’ That’s her statement.

My relation to this is my own feelings of pretty extreme anxiety lately, not knowing which direction I’m going in, and the motivation to be very still and stay in one place and turn my attention to myself, and a lack of motivation to do what I used to do and a PASSION for some thing that seems to be insatiable. There is a desire which is like an obsession, and I feel like I’m going in circles and not proceeding, so to speak. That’s the first question.

ELIAS: Very well. First of all, allow me to offer to you information concerning intents. An intent, simply put, is a general direction or theme that an individual chooses throughout their focus, throughout their physical manifestation.

Now; generally speaking, this intent or direction or theme does not alter throughout the individual’s manifestation. Even as an individual may fragment and alter their alignment or even alter the essence family that they are belonging to, generally speaking this may be, in a manner of speaking, affecting of particulars in relation to the individual’s intent but not necessarily affecting of the intent itself. For although an individual may fragment and may alter their essence tone, their family and alignment, the individual focus of attention, which is that that defines you as an individual in this manifestation, remains the same. Are you understanding thus far?

KC: Yes, I am understanding.

ELIAS: Very well. Therefore the individual manifestation, the individual focus of attention, being the same continues to generate the same intent.

Now; be aware, I am speaking in general terms and this is not a rule; therefore, it is not an absolute. But I may express to you that the individual RARELY alters their focus to the extent that they generate a different intent or an entirely different expression of that individual focus. In the instances in which an individual chooses to create that type of expression in that dramatic of a manner, they shall also create extreme manifestations within their focus that shall offer them and other individuals what you view as reasonable or rational explanations for the dramatic alteration.

For example, an individual may create an extreme experience in which they generate a manifestation of what you term to be amnesia, therefore allowing themselves to entirely alter the direction of the focus and disassociate their individual identity with the previous expression.

Now; this is not the situation with this individual, and I may express although there are some alterations of certain directions, the theme or the intent of the individual remains the same.

Now; I shall also briefly express once again the manner in which any individual may allow themselves to identify their individual intent. It is a general direction.

Now; figuratively speaking, you may visualize a physical expression of an individual’s intent as a tree.

KC: A tree!

ELIAS: Yes. The trunk of the tree may be visualized as the general direction of the intent, the general direction of the movement.

Now; in the scenario of the tree, its movement is to extend upward. The branches of the tree are much more expressive and less general - more specifically expressed, more detailed in the expression. In an individual’s intent, they express a general theme and from that general theme or direction each of you generates many, many, many specific experiences that all may be related to the general theme. There are countless expressions in diversity that may be associated with any one theme.

KC: I understand! Because it would be like giving everyone a theme... Say you were in a class and you wanted them to write a play, and you tell them what the theme is and they all write a different play and all of their particulars are different.

ELIAS: Correct. Every direction of expressions within your focus shall be related to that general theme, whether it is expressed in artistic creativity or interaction with other individuals, relationships, your employment, your hobbies, your interests. All of your experiences shall be specific branches of that general theme and shall be influenced by that general theme.

This general theme is expressed continuously, literally throughout the entirety of the individual’s focus. It may be viewed in childhood, within adolescence, in adulthood. There are no moments of your focus that do not reflect some expression of that general theme. It is the manner in which you move yourself through your individual exploration of this focus.

Now; as to the particular of identifying different movements and which movements may be better suited to the intent, I may genuinely express to you each, this type of questioning is essentially irrelevant for it matters not, for any choice that you generate shall be an expression of the theme.

Now; altering the alignment of a particular focus introduces different qualities which are associated with the alignment family, which do interplay in your expressions of the more specific directions or expressions of the intent, for you generate an influence of those qualities in relation to your choices and the manner in which you direct energy. But what is significant to view in relation to the influences of the specific directed expressions of an intent are those concerning your choices and what you actually want to generate. This is influenced by the individual’s orientation, by the individual’s beliefs, by the individual’s association with qualities of families, which all interplay with perception.

Now; I am understanding of the confusion that is being generated by the other individual, and the concern, in a manner of speaking, that is being generated by yourself in confusion in relation to your movements in this present now.

She generates confusion concerning direction and attempting to assess the best direction, which is projecting attention outwardly and [is] also strongly influenced by beliefs concerning choices. It is not a matter of the best direction. It is a matter of allowance of self to be generating choices that you genuinely want and that generate fun, playfulness, preference and satisfaction within the individual.

I may express to you, in this present now this particular expression is being addressed by many, many, many individuals throughout your world, for what you are presenting to yourselves is genuinely turning your attentions to yourselves, and this is a VERY unfamiliar action. Presenting choice to yourselves in theory is exciting, for you do incorporate somewhat of a recognition that if you are allowing yourselves choice, you also generate a tremendous expression of freedom. But the enactment of choice becomes quite challenging, for once you recognize that you potentially incorporate choice - not that you KNOW that you do incorporate choice but that you potentially incorporate choice - you open the door or the floodgates in association with the influence of your beliefs and all of the expressions that restrict you in which you express to yourself that you cannot engage certain choices. This is what motivates the thought process in the direction of attempting to assess what is the best avenue to be engaging, for you do not allow yourselves the freedom to express permission to yourselves to choose what you want regardless of your beliefs.

In maneuvering yourselves around your beliefs, in a manner of speaking - not changing your beliefs but recognizing that you incorporate certain beliefs - acknowledging that and allowing your choice regardless, even if the choice appears to you to be in opposition of your beliefs...

KC: Oh, Elias! I simply... Can I talk now? (Laughs)

ELIAS: You may!

KC: I’m dying to tell you about my tree!

ELIAS: Very well!

KC: We spoke about a year ago in my time, and I was very devastated and in despair because the city was going to put a trench too close to my tree, and my belief that I hold is that the trench will weaken or damage the tree. You told me what my belief was, and of course it’s so obvious that I didn’t even see it. I was blind to that belief. You told me then that I could actualize my choice in opposition to my belief even with my belief in play and that my choice was to continue my energy exchange with my tree, with myself in the form of my tree.

When we were speaking, I knew that was true. I didn’t just believe that it was potentially true, I knew it was true. I knew that this belief, that the trench will be too close to the tree and it will weaken the tree, was a tool that I could use or not use. I don’t even know how to express how much this matters not, because I finally understood what ’it matters not’ means! Oh, I am so excited I’m going to cry! (Emotionally) Because what happened was I accepted a belief, I created my choice, I allowed myself patience to let that choice unfold, and what happened was the tree mattered not. It was the most unbelievable freedom that I can ever begin to express, because I could actually understand!

Before I talked to you, I kept saying to myself, ’But I’ve chosen this tree to matter.’ But I didn’t understand that ’it matters not’ means that I matter, that the tree I created exists, it can’t be annihilated. It doesn’t really matter what form it stays in - if it changes, if it moves, if it dies, if it falls over, or if it just stays the way it is. I have the power to make my choice with regard to my tree in any way I want, and I understand that it doesn’t matter what the city does, where the trench is put or anything.

Now I can go in two directions from here. There’s some additional information about the tree that I would like to bring up, because it’s a little bit funny and a little bit not funny. Then there is the thing that I’ve been trying to do with this feeling of knowing what it feels like, this ’it matters not’ feeling, and this freedom. I’ve been trying to transfer that to other beliefs and I’m having difficulty, so I would like to talk about that second.

But first of all, there is no trench yet! So, I’m creating my energy exchange with my tree just the way I wanted to. Of course, then there is this other belief that it would have been much better to put the trench in in the winter when the tree was sleeping. Now it’s spring, and the sap in the tree is rising and the tree is coming up. This is another belief, that I believe that spring is a more dangerous time to put the trench in than winter would have been. I think I’ve accepted that belief too, and no matter when they put the trench in or whatever they do, I can still continue my energy exchange with the tree. Oh, tell me that I’ve accepted that belief, too! Am I right?

ELIAS: Yes.

KC: Oh, good! Oh, Elias, I can hardly stand it, I’m so excited!

ELIAS: I may express to you, my friend, I applaud you, for you have offered yourself a genuine understanding of this concept and have allowed yourself to insert it into reality.

KC: (Emotionally) Elias, I know what it means to acknowledge myself, too. It seems so strange. When we spoke last and we redefined compassion... I try to stay in the now, and I must tell you that you have not indicated how difficult it is, staying in the now. It’s difficult. But I’ve tried to offer compassion to myself and I’ve tried to put myself first, so to speak, and get to know myself first. I want this relationship with myself that you talk about that is so satisfying. I want that. That’s my desire. So at least I’ve identified my desire, and the no separation is my other desire. I want to FEEL what that feels like, like I know what ’it matters not’ feels like. I want to feel that no separation.

Ah, but I digress. I use this tree situation very frequently to identify my other beliefs, and I will actually transpose situations onto the tree story. In other words, I will present to myself that one event or person is the trench and the other event or person is the tree, and the one event is in danger from the other event and so on, other people’s choices dictating to me what my choice will be. Then I will try to identify the belief and not judge it and choose what my choice will be.

I’ll tell you, the problem I think I’m having is making a clear choice. I guess sometimes I just don’t know what it is I want. I know what my desires are and I know what I need, and I’m interested in the shift. But as far as my wants that I used to want, say relationships or... Oh my, I can’t even think of any, see? I don’t have any wants!

ELIAS: Ah! But my friend, you generate wants within every moment. What you are noticing is not that you don’t incorporate wants, but that you have offered yourself an understanding and an awareness of HOW you create, and therefore you offer yourself permission in the moment to generate what you want. Therefore, once again it moves into a genuine expression of freedom and matters not, and you do not concern yourself with wants or the analyzation of wants any longer, for you are allowing yourself to create them.

KC: Oh, that’s what I kept saying to myself! I have what I want. I’m already creating what I want. How am I doing this? (Laughs)

ELIAS: Correct, and therefore you do not concern yourself with the expression of wants, for you are creating it.

KC: Well, now let’s talk to you about what I thought I wanted as far as relationships go and what I think now that I really want as far as my relationships go.

I have really got a lot of nice friends, and what I wanted in the past was to go and have fun with them and have them think of me in a certain way and have them like me as much as I liked them and so on, approve of me. Now I look at them like they’re magic, because if they voice a belief, I’m presuming that’s a reflection of MY belief. I’ve been trying to pay attention to all the avenues of communication, and this relationship business is so diverse! I must have tons of different kinds of relationships with myself because I have so many different kinds of relationships with other people, even people that don’t like me and I don’t like them.

ELIAS: Correct!

KC: The purpose of these relationships is not the kind of satisfaction that I’ve wanted in the past, say intimacy and sexuality and oh, I don’t even remember what they are. Now I’m just fascinated, oh, I just am fascinated! It’s like communications are bombarding me from every which way, from inside, from outside. So maybe that IS my identification of my wants, then.

ELIAS: Yes.

KC: Well, I’m distinguishing between desire, which I define as a need... I feel that I shall die without the no separation, so to speak - I’m just kidding! As far as the wants, you’re correct, I have enough to eat and a place to live and friends and my health, and I called you. You know, I only made up some questions so I could call you! (Laughs)

ELIAS: And what you have generated is allowing yourself an appreciation of you.

KC: Well, I want more of it. I want more of it! You’re right, it’s the floodgates. Once you get a taste of the acceptance and the trust, you simply must have all of it. Your quote when you say it will always be now and there will always be more, it just makes me so happy. I mean, I knew there would always be more, but now I really know it. I always believed it and now I KNOW it within me.

ELIAS: And you KNOW this for you have allowed yourself experience.

KC: Yes! That’s the other quote of yours! (Laughs)

I waited a long time to talk to you. I would come up with a question and then I would answer the question myself, and in a way that got frustrating because I thought, darn it, I won’t have any questions to ask Elias! So what happened - and I should tell this because it’s funny, and I don’t know if you were there or not - but I got pulled over by the police and they said that my license plate on my car was expired and that I had to go get a new one. I decided that my time was up, that I needed to call you. The police car was blue, the Sumafi police and all that, so I used that! Whether that was really us working together or whether I just used it to budge myself to make the appointment with Mary to call you, I don’t know.

ELIAS: Ha ha ha ha! (Both laugh) Quite...

KC: I thought it was quite fun. It was a fun thing, anyway. I still don’t have a license plate on my car but they seem to be leaving me alone! (More laughter)

I had a wizard dream years ago, and after I discovered that you had a focus as a wizard I wondered if that was you. In the dream I was worried, and I presented to myself this question of what choices should I make and was I making the right choices. That was the question for my suggestion before I went to sleep. So I had the dream and this wizard was standing next to me on my right and he had a magic wand. He was showing me on this tapestry what I guess would be lines of probabilities and the wider now. My life was this tapestry, and he was showing me how beautiful it was and how perfect it was and how wonderful it was, and all these roads that I could take, and basically it didn’t matter which one I took. Then I saw that you had a focus as a wizard, and I wondered if that was my introduction to you or if I generated that myself?

ELIAS: Your first impression is correct.

KC: Aha! Well, I’m telling you what!

I’ve redefined my idea of fun also. (Both laugh) I find that there’s more things that are becoming fun. Even when I read for instance that our emotions... Well, I don’t know how different they’ll be; I imagine they will evolve along with the rest of us in the shift and so they’ll be maybe motivated differently or whatever. I was experiencing heartbreak, and I remembered what you said about trying to make things playful and not judging. I was sitting here and my heart was just broken, and so I just acknowledged that feeling, and ’oh, this is what heartbreak feels like and it’s just an emotion and it’s not going to kill you.’ And the minute I accepted it and quit judging it, it like moved out of me over to the right, and I missed it! So I walked over and like got into this emotion again so that I could just feel it, and that was fun! I would never describe heartbreak as fun before.

ELIAS: And what was your identification of the communication that was offered?

KC: Is that receiving the message, though? I’m still confused about receiving the message. I brought up this anxiety and the motivation is to not to do anything. It feels like a lack of motivation, but it must be a motivation to stay in the now and turn my attention to myself.

ELIAS: Correct.

KC: I’m feeling this anxiety and frustration. You said that trauma may first appear in the form of frustration, so I presume that I’m creating some trauma here. I don’t know. See, right now when I’m talking to you, it doesn’t matter! (Laughs) Everything, everything just feels like it is as it should be.

ELIAS: I am under...

KC: That is one of the reasons that I called you. I know when I’m talking to you objectively I feel what acceptance feels like, so when I generate it totally for myself I can recognize it.

ELIAS: I am understanding.

Now; let me express to you an identification of allowing yourself to receive the message of an emotion. For you may be allowing yourself to receive the message without turning your attention to thought, and therefore you may receive the communication and not necessarily incorporate a thought or a translation of that communication in thought. The manner in which you shall allow yourself the objective knowing that you have received the message or the communication is that you shall discontinue the emotion, but not merely discontinue the emotion and the signal, but you shall also generate a sense within yourself of acceptance, or you may translate that into a momentary expression of calm.

This is your acknowledgment to yourself objectively without incorporating thought, for most individuals do generate some type of translation of thought that allows them an objective recognition that they have received the communication. But some individuals do not necessarily acknowledge themselves through thought continuously; some allow themselves a validation through other expressions.

Now; there is a difference between genuinely receiving the communication and acknowledging that to yourself without turning your attention to thought, and merely ignoring the communication and discontinuing the signal. For in that situation, the individual shall merely re-create the signal within another time framework to offer themselves the opportunity once again to receive the message.

KC: I do that. I do both of those, I think. A lot of times I recognize when I simply am ignoring the message and the signal. I know that it will come back again, but I appreciate the little vacation! (Both laugh)

In fact, things seem to be doing exactly that. My feelings are like pulsing, like three- or four-day pulses, where I will be very anxious and I will present myself with lots of uncomfortable imagery to force myself to pay attention to myself and keep myself in the now. Then I will have three or four days of very comfortable, sort of not-a-care-in-the-world kind of feeling that everything is so perfect I can barely stand it. So I can work with that. I can do that, because I know when I feel bad that it’s not going to last forever. I know that when I feel good and I’m not really addressing to a lot consciously that I’ll certainly give myself the opportunity to do so soon enough! (Laughs)

ELIAS: I am understanding.

KC: There’s one thing that I’m really wanting to know about. I met a man in Portland, Maine last year before the Connecticut public session, and here is what happened. I was standing outside of the hotel with my back to the door, and I felt this blast of energy come out the door and surround me. I turned around and this man, this young man, followed his energy, so to speak, out the door. I looked at him and I thought to myself that I know this person. He looked at me and he started to walk down the street, and he turned around and came back to me and said, ’Do I know you?’ And I said, ’I don’t know. My name is Nanaiis.’ He said, ’You remind me of someone,’ and then we said a few more words and he left. I told him that my name was Nanaiis just in case he should ever call you and his essence name should be the same name, because I felt like it might be another focus of myself. What was that?

ELIAS: Actually I may express to you, my friend, no, this is not another focus of you, but this is a presentment to yourself of your desire in actual experience, briefly, concerning the genuine expression of a lack of separation in recognition that there is in actuality no separation of essences. One individual, in a manner of speaking, is the other individual. You ARE the other individual.

KC: I understand that. I thought that might be it, too, because I read one of Vicki’s sessions in which she did that with a man at the bank.

ELIAS: You are correct, and this is a very similar experience.

KC: Well, it was a very wonderful experience.

Also, I understand that the number of focuses that you have or that you hold in this dimension continuously change. (Pause) I realize that wasn’t a question.

ELIAS: Not necessarily. I may express to you that there is fluctuation, and I may express to you it is the choice of the essence. There is a degree of fluctuation, for there are many actions that are occurring continuously within consciousness.

An essence may choose to be generating a specific numbering of focuses of attention, which figuratively speaking, as they are all expressed simultaneously at the moment of choice to be participating in a physical dimension or in this physical dimension, the essence figuratively bursts into an expression of all of its manifestations of attentions simultaneously.

The essence may choose to hold to that expression of a specific numbering of attentions or it may alter that numbering, but there are also other expressions which occur within consciousness and within essences that may alter or create a fluctuation in that specific numbering. At times an essence may fragment, and its fragmentation may be generated by a focus of attention. Therefore, in your physical terms that particular focus of attention may be subtracted from the essence which generated that focus of attention. Or there may be a mergence between different essences and in that mergence there may be generated other focuses of attention which may be additional to any one of those essences in their numbering of attentions in the particular physical dimension.

I express a physical numbering of attentions to those of you that inquire as the number of focuses that are incorporated in that moment, and also as the total numbering of focuses in what may be viewed as general potential, in a manner of speaking not incorporating the fluctuations but the general potential numbering that you as a particular essence have chosen as your expression of focuses not in association with the fluctuations. Are you understanding?

KC: I don’t know! (Laughs) I thought I was until the last sentence. A general potential would be to me a number within which you would fluctuate.

ELIAS: Yes. In a manner of speaking, in a hypothetical example I may express to you [that] a hypothetical essence may choose at the moment of the burst point 465 focuses of attention.

Now; this is the total numbering of focuses of attention that this essence has chosen to be expressing as a potential. It generates that specific number, but it remains a potential for it is not absolute.

Now; it may continue to generate 465 focuses of attention in its completion, so to speak, at the point that it chooses to remove its attentions from the particular physical dimension. But within the time framework that it is participating in the physical dimension, that total numbering may fluctuate.

KC: Well, I think I’m getting a hint of... Maybe I’m scratching the surface, maybe not! (Laughs)

Another desire that I have is to comprehend simultaneous time or what you refer to as simultaneous time. At various times, linear times, I felt like I understood it, and then I would learn a little new thing that would make me realize I didn’t understand it. But I will understand it! (Elias chuckles)

I don’t have too many more questions, but I do have kind of a fun question. I don’t know, we’ll see if you answer it or not! My Polynesian focus - I swear to goodness I think I created this focus in 1984 because I dreamed him up. I decided that he was going to be my quote ’next’ focus because I wanted a vacation focus, and so I made him. I felt like I created him. I gave him his body and his personality and his friends and his... I think his alignment is Ilda. Is he Ilda/Ilda?

ELIAS: Yes.

KC: And his friend Kahana, and I would like to know who is Kahana, Kahana’s essence name. (Pause)

ELIAS: And your impression?

KC: Oh, Elias! My impression... Let me explain the word ’Kahana’ and how I made that up. I went to Hawaii and I got an Hawaiian dictionary. I wanted to make a name for myself to sign my paintings with. I put Kahana together and to me it means ’a piece of work.’ ’A piece of work’ is a humorous term that we use to mean somebody who is just irresistible and really delightful and remarkable. So that’s Kahana to me. I figured that Kahana was either you or Charles or Vince or David, because you’re all a piece of work! (Both laugh)

ELIAS: Let me express to you, you have created two scenarios. You do generate a focus of attention that incorporates this Polynesian culture and occupies that physical location. I may also express to you, the identification of THIS expression that you are speaking of is different. This individual that you are speaking of is actually literally a creation of yours, as you being expressed as a focus of attention.

You have created a probable self and you have created a probable reality. In this, you created the expressions of the friends that this probable self interacts with, and you created these individuals as a projection of energy which is known to you that you have interacted with in relation to individuals within your reality that you incorporate a fondness for.

Now; be aware, probable selves, once generated, express their own reality and generate their own choices. Although they are an aspect of you, they incorporate the same free will and create their individual reality in like manner to yourself.

KC: I understand that.

ELIAS: But I may express to you also, you, in generating this probable reality and this probable self and offering yourself a clear identification of them, may allow yourself to actually engage this probable self and be interactive with it.

KC: Oh! I think I’ve done that a tiny bit because... I think he’s in a past time framework. He saw my kitchen window and he didn’t know what it was - but I don’t know how to explain it. We were occupying the same place in the same body more or less; we were merged. I was looking out my kitchen window and he saw it, I guess, through my eyes. I could sort of feel the puzzlement in his mind, but he thought he was dreaming. Anyway...

ELIAS: I am understanding, and you may be generating much fun in interaction in relation to this individual.

KC: I sing with him occasionally and I think he dances, too! (Both laugh) But now, what is this other focus of mine that incorporates the Polynesian area that is a navigator and a shipbuilder? Is that a different individual...

ELIAS: Yes.

KC: ...or is that the same probability?

ELIAS: No, this is a different individual, and this is not within this time framework. That individual overlaps but would not be viewed as necessarily one that occupies the same time framework as yourself - partially but not entirely.

KC: Okay. Our time is up. I just have one teeny tiny question. Did Charles choose fragment and become the focus of another essence? When I asked you his essence name a year ago it was Jerrica, but you said that there was a fragmentation that was occurring. (Pause)

ELIAS: Not yet.

KC: I must tell you, Bridgy says hello, and my husband David, his essence name is Flynn, offers you greetings.

ELIAS: And you may offer my greetings in return.

KC: I will. It’s been very wonderful. I think I’ll have another session with you soon. Thank you, Elias.

ELIAS: Very well, I shall be anticipating this. As always, I offer to you tremendous affection and wondrous encouragement, my friend.

KC: I love you, too. Thanks, Elias. Au revoir.

ELIAS: Au revoir.

Elias departs at 1:46 PM.

(1) See , 4/5/01.

©2004 Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved

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Copyright 2002 Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved.