Lack of Motivation
"Lack of Motivation"
"Exploring an Emotional Signal"
Saturday, February 16, 2002 (Private/Phone)
Participants: Mary (Michael) and Rodney (Zacharie)
Elias arrives at 2:55 PM. (Arrival time is 27 seconds.)
ELIAS: Good afternoon!
RODNEY: Hi Elias, how are you?
ELIAS: As always, and yourself?
RODNEY: Ah! I don't know, really. (Laughs with Elias) I knew you would ask that and the first word that came to mind was "shitty."
RODNEY: So I've been looking at that. It's been a long time since we've talked in this way. I've been doing a lot of personal judgment on myself, and noticing it to some extent. I feel scattered; I feel confused and like nothing is going in a very directed way.
Which leads me to ask, I've noticed that it takes me an incredible amount of energy to get started on something. Once I get started, I seem to generate a tremendous amount of energy to accomplish it. Once I get started, things happen and I'm pleased with what I produce. But it's getting started - there's just so much inertia!
I read your comments about astrology, which I found very interesting because I did a lot of work in astrology many years ago. I gave it up because it felt like I was being controlled by forces outside of me and I didn't like that. The spin that you put on it, which is they're there because we've created them there, has given me a whole new look at that. I think perhaps I can go back and use astrology in a far more beneficial way because I can look at it like "this is what you have chosen to create for yourself; now what can you do with the energies that you've created?"
One of the astrological aspects in my life is that Saturn exists in my first house, which I don't know if that's got anything to do with this or not. But there seems to be big issues with me about starting anything, and I was wondering if you might comment on that.
ELIAS: First of all, express to me an identification of your incorporation of judgment.
RODNEY: I don't know whether it's simply discounting myself or just asking "why are you this way?" It's almost like I'm looking for a way to make it different. I have a lot of projects that I want to start or that I've started, in a sense, that I want to finish, and I don't get to finishing them. I just get distracted. It's like I come home, I prepare dinner - I enjoy that - I clean up, then I feel like going to sleep. It's too easy to put things off to another day.
ELIAS: Very well.
RODNEY: I'm mindful of a session I read that you had with Mikah about a year ago in which this issue came up, the issue of motivation. You spoke of - and I don't have it in front of me - you spoke of the fact that there seems to be a belief that we don't have to take action, that all we have to do is think about things and they happen. I'm mindful of that discussion that you had with him. It's initiating the action that is perplexing me. I just keep putting things off.
ELIAS: I am understanding.
RODNEY: It's like I'm in a rut! (Laughs) I get up, I do the things I have to do, and that's it!
ELIAS: Now; express to me your correlation with what you are expressing and that of your astrology.
RODNEY: I just picked that because it came to me. Saturn is a planet of "let's leave things the way they are," "the status quo is supreme," and "let's not change things too much." I seem to be satisfied with the experience of whatever I'm doing to such an extent that I choose not to move on to experience something different.
ELIAS: And you view this to be bad.
RODNEY: Well, I saw that also, that I had a judgment on that and I saw that to be bad. God, Elias, I could sit underneath the apple tree and contemplate the grass for the rest of my focus! (Laughing)
ELIAS: Or so it appears in this moment or in this time framework. As that continues, you view this to be negative for you are expressing a lack of motivation and you assess that you incorporate many projects that are not being accomplished.
ELIAS: Therefore, this is bad.
RODNEY: I did see that aspect of it, and experiencing the sensuality of the moment is not bad in itself. It's kind of like behind that is the idea "is this all there is?" Is there some benefit that I can see in actually having this lack of motivation?
ELIAS: Ah, and this is the question.
Now; recognize that as I have stated previously the expressions and the movements and the qualities that are expressed in relation to your creation of astrology are in actuality the reverse of your belief concerning it. For the belief expresses that the universe moves in a particular manner and that the planets and the configurations of energies are dictating to you certain expressions and experiences; but in actuality, you generate the entirety of the universe as you know it, and in this, the movements that occur within your universe are quite real, but they are reflections of you.
Now; in this...
RODNEY: Why did I create them that way?
ELIAS: ...in this, you may also view that you incorporate many beliefs concerning action and productivity, and therefore in certain time frameworks you may justify certain expressions of confusion or lack of motivation in association with your beliefs concerning the movements of your planets and what they are expressing, so to speak.
But are you genuinely allowing yourself to pay attention to these reflections and allowing yourself to view what you are generating, and viewing not necessarily the judgment concerning what you are generating but [also] the opportunity that you are presenting to yourself? Which, in actuality, this is a rhetorical question, for you have already responded in expressing your question to myself: Why are you creating this? What are you reflecting to yourself?
RODNEY: Yes, what's the opportunity?
ELIAS: Listen to what you have offered as an explanation of the characteristics of expression of one planet: status quo, lack of change, maintaining...
RODNEY: The familiarity.
ELIAS: Very well.
Now; at times you present to yourselves movements that may be viewed, in your terms, as slower or that you interpret as a lack of motivation, for you are not generating the type of productivity that you expect but you view that you should be expressing, and you automatically view this as negative or as an expression that some action of movement within you is wrong. You approach questionings to yourself from this angle, rather than paying attention to what you are actually generating and allowing yourself to explore that action and that movement and genuinely assess what you are offering to yourself in the moment.
In this, there is a tremendous movement in energy in this time framework presently.
RODNEY: That's for everyone, right?
ELIAS: Yes. There are tremendous energy surges that are occurring. As these energy surges are occurring in relation to the insertion of this shift and its acceleration, many, many, many individuals are experiencing this tremendous movement in energy but are opposing it, in a manner of speaking, or generating an expectation within themselves that they must be, in your terms, taking advantage of these surges in energy that are occurring en masse within consciousness and therefore expressing more motivation in what you classify as forward movement.
Now; in actuality, in this time framework, generating that type of expression...
RODNEY: Which are you referring to, "that type"?
ELIAS: Opposing the energy or expressing an expectation that you should be incorporating this energy to be more motivating is generating a tremendous expression of friction and confusion with many, many, many individuals. At times, some of these energy surges are so great, in your terms, that it may be more efficient to allow yourselves to merely notice and relax and flow.
In this time framework there is a tremendous movement in surging energy to be incorporating paying attention to self. This is an enormous movement in relation to this shift in consciousness.
RODNEY: Can I make a comment about that? Last week I was so not into coping with issues at work that I said to myself, "I'm going to stay home, I'm going to pay attention to self, I'm going to focus on my self worth, and I'm going to allow myself to do that." And I took the day off. Two days later I created an illness, and so I've spent two of the last seven days also at home, sleeping mostly, but paying attention to self and kind of drifting.
ELIAS: And this is the point, my friend.
RODNEY: Is this the response that you're suggesting is more appropriate...
RODNEY: ...with all of this energy going on?
ELIAS: Yes, to allow yourself to rest in the appreciation of you and recognize that you do not incorporate "supposed to's" or "have to's" or the expectations that are familiarly generated within you in association with what you must be generating outside of yourself in expressions of productivity.
RODNEY: Well, I must say that I am making some progress in this area, but it's not easy.
RODNEY: I am paying attention to self, and the result is that what I see more than anything else is my duplicity.
ELIAS: And how difficult is it to rest within your own status quo and merely appreciate the familiarity of you in unfamiliar movements. Appreciate your being-ness, rather than expressing the measurement of yourself in relation to what you do or what you produce.
RODNEY: You know, I started writing a poem many, many years ago, and I only wrote the first line. (Laughs) The first line was "By what measure do I stand?" Maybe that's the only line I had to write.
ELIAS: Quite, and this is a worthy question.
RODNEY: Well, Elias, as I waited for this session I realized how much I've missed not talking to you for a year. (Elias laughs) I do appreciate your energy.
ELIAS: And it is expressed to you always, my friend.
RODNEY: I'm beginning to sense that more and more. I was sharing some comments about your thoughts with a person in the bookstore at ISD and I found myself going beyond sharing and doing a little teaching. All of a sudden the CD player started malfunctioning. (Both laugh) I caught it a second later and thought, "That had to be Elias."
ELIAS: (Laughs) Offering a gentle reminder.
RODNEY: Yes, thank you! I do have a couple of other questions. As you can obviously view I'm not all that organized right now.
ELIAS: It matters not, my friend.
RODNEY: (Laughs) Thank you, thank you, thank you.
I've met an individual named George - I'm sure you know who I'm referring to - and I'd like to talk about my relationship with him, briefly. We've had many very long conversations. I'm fascinated by him. We see the world in incredibly different ways, and I'm noticing that. But the aspect that I find fascinating is that on three occasions when he left me either physically or after a phone call, I was overcome with emotion. I mean very, very, very strong emotion. I just broke down and cried. I'm aware enough to know that I'm sending myself a message, and I've tried to sense into what that message is...
ELIAS: What do you identify as the signal?
RODNEY: The signal is the emotion.
ELIAS: No, what do you identify as the signal?
RODNEY: Oh, what do I identify as the signal?
RODNEY: The crying, the emotion.
ELIAS: The feeling. How do you identify the feeling, with what term?
RODNEY: For lack of a better word, love or... That's not actually that accurate. A sense of separateness? I hate to admit, perhaps a desire that he be different than he is. I don't know if that's accurate or not, or that we at least understand each other better, more fully. There's just a lot of mixed feelings in this.
ELIAS: More accurately, to be defined not as an expression of love but rather as a signal of disappointment...
RODNEY: Ah! I wasn't going to go there, but I did go there.
ELIAS: ...and sadness.
ELIAS: But you are correct that you do incorporate a partial expression of love concerning this individual, and this generates the frustration. For the partial expression of love that you incorporate is that of appreciation without the other aspect which completes the expression and the circle of love, which is knowing.
RODNEY: Ah! Appreciation without the knowing.
ELIAS: Correct. This generates frustration, which is being expressed in signals of disappointment and sadness.
RODNEY: Yes. Yes, I can see that's a very accurate description.
ELIAS: And in identifying and defining the signal, you may thusly turn your attention inward to you, not concerning yourself with the other individual, for the message does not concern the other individual; the message concerns you and what you are expressing and generating in the moment in association with the influences of your beliefs.
The sadness is generated in recognition of you denying yourself your choices. What choices are you denying yourself? Those of your own expression, to be allowing yourself to offer your expression freely without incorporating expectation concerning the other individual or concerning yourself with the questioning of the other individual's perception, but merely allowing yourself to freely express what you want in relation to the other individual.
The denial of that choice generates the signal and the message of the emotion, that in the moment you are not allowing yourself the choice to freely express you. You are hesitant and restricted, for you are concerning yourself with the perception and the response of the other individual...
RODNEY: And that's so true.
ELIAS: ...rather than the expression of your own freedom.
RODNEY: That is so accurate, Elias.
ELIAS: The disappointment is expressed as the signal, concerning the message that you are offering to yourself in the moments that your association is a frustration that the manner in which you shall allow yourself your choice shall be generated only in relation to an alteration of the other individual's expression. But within self you do incorporate the knowing that you do not create another individual's reality; but you are creating the other individual and you are creating the interaction. Therefore, you express the disappointment that you are projecting your attention outside of yourself, attempting to alter the expression or the perception of the other individual, and this is not the point.
RODNEY: Gotcha. That all makes a lot of sense.
ELIAS: Let me express to you, my friend, these are very strongly expressed beliefs that generate very strong associations: "If another individual shall alter their expression, I may allow myself to offer my genuine expression; my choice of allowing myself freedom of my expression is dependent upon what is offered first by the other individual."
RODNEY: This is so true. This is exactly where I come from.
ELIAS: These are the beliefs and they are quite strongly influencing; and denying your natural expression and your choice within you generates a genuine sadness.
RODNEY: Thank you, Mr. Elias! (Laughing)
ELIAS: You are quite welcome. You may offer yourself permission, Zacharie, to express your choices and your energy freely in genuineness regardless of the choices of other individuals or whether you perceive them to understand or not, for the key is allowing yourself the freedom to be expressing you, and that action in genuineness in itself alters the reality. For this generates an acceptance of you, and as you generate an acceptance of you, you automatically project that energy outwardly and create a natural by-product of acceptance of another individual, and that energy is automatically and immediately recognized.
RODNEY: I do understand that. Thank you.
ELIAS: You are welcome.
RODNEY: Not that it's a totally separate issue, but have this gentlemen and I been involved in other focuses, et cetera?
RODNEY: Quite a few, I would imagine.
ELIAS: Yes, and therefore the energy is quite familiar.
RODNEY: Yes. I'm also aware that he's soft and I understand that people of different orientations tend to see the world quite differently.
ELIAS: In some respects, yes, you are correct. This is not to say that you cannot translate these languages and allow yourselves a genuine understanding of each other.
RODNEY: Thank you for that encouragement. (Laughs) We have a little bit more time left here.
Over the last month or so I've had many dreams that were highly charged emotionally with fear, and they involved fighting between individuals, myself involved, much brutality - just fighting. I don't have them all transcribed clearly, but I've been sensing into why I've been creating these dreams, and one of the impressions I got is that there's two aspects. One, this very well could be a viewing of other focuses, and if it is, then the question is why am I viewing it. The other aspect is I have an aversion to conflict.
Now, I understand that the point of all of this that we do is to learn or to move in a way that does not create conflict, but in another sense being afraid of conflict doesn't serve me either. I sense that I'm creating these dreams perhaps to become more familiar with conflict. Is that possible?
ELIAS: Yes. Yes, I may express to you, you are correct in both of your impressions. Some of this dream imagery is associated with other focuses, and the reason that you draw that to yourself and allow yourself to view...
RODNEY: Is to accept it?
ELIAS: ...is to be recognizing and allowing yourself an examination of your associations and automatic responses in relation to conflict and your expression of fear concerning this expression in conflict. For as you continue to incorporate the fear, you are once again expressing a discounting and denial of self, and in that you perpetuate the expression of fear in attempting to ignore conflict rather than addressing to it.
RODNEY: That's what I sense. If I'm ignoring it or hiding from it then I'm not addressing to it. I'm not accepting it.
RODNEY: I'm just not coping with it, period.
ELIAS: Correct, and you continue to generate it.
RODNEY: Right. So that's what those dreams were about.
RODNEY: Okay; thank you.
ELIAS: You are welcome.
RODNEY: A couple of weeks ago I had a bad day with my investments, and when that happens I get strong feelings of despondency, self-doubt, issues like that. I'm beginning to sense that by accepting those feelings and moving forward anyway, I get to see that I do have other choices, and generally pull myself out of the losses that I've experienced.
But one of the impressions I got is that I'm actually creating this kind of rollercoaster ride that I create with my investments in order to experience a heightened sense of attention on myself. Is this accurate?
ELIAS: Partially, yes, you are correct. In this heightened attention to self, you also offer yourself in objective physical terms, physical imagery, the opportunity to view your automatic association. In the moments that you are generating what you view as success, you express an acknowledgment of yourself that you are creating your reality.
RODNEY: (Laughs) Right!
ELIAS: And in the moment that you are creating a loss, you express to yourself that you are not creating your reality very well.
RODNEY: Yes. Judgments in both cases.
RODNEY: Okay. I got that one.
ELIAS: In loss, perhaps you may be creating your reality but you are not choosing this, and therefore you are not creating your reality very efficiently. (Laughs with Rodney) But in expressions of gain, you are immediately acknowledging your creativity and how well you are creating your reality.
RODNEY: There's also an acknowledgment there that I'm paying attention to what I sense to be a communication from self, that this is the movement that I should be going in. I'm talking in terms of what investments to make.
ELIAS: Or rather, merely, this is the direction you choose to be moving in, for you prefer one experience rather than another. But you also continue to generate the other at times in the loss, and what does this generate? Conflict and discounting of yourself, and offers you yet again another opportunity to be examining you and addressing to conflict and loss, rather than attempting to ignore it by busily attempting to alter it.
This, my friend, is being expressed in many more directions than merely financial but in many expressions of investment, in your terms: investment of yourself in many expressions, the investment of your energy, your attention, your time; yourself in relation to other individuals, in relation to your work environment, in relation to yourself. You merely generate physical objective imagery in relation to finances as a reflection of many aspects of your focus.
RODNEY: I do put a lot of attention there. Elias, I thank you very much.
ELIAS: You are very welcome, my dear friend.
RODNEY: We have a couple of minutes left. Do you have any comments you'd like to make, beyond which you've already spoken?
ELIAS: My comment to you, my dear friend, may be merely to be acknowledging of yourself and noticing the moments in which you are discounting yourself, and choose to stop. As I have stated to you many times, you are a very worthy individual, Zacharie, worthy of your own acknowledgment, your own appreciation and knowing of yourself. Therefore, my comment to you is to be remembering your one line of your poem.
RODNEY: Ah! Thank you, dear sir.
ELIAS: You are very welcome, my friend.
RODNEY: I would like to end this with a comment on something we spoke about almost a year ago. At that time I asked you a question regarding emotion and sexuality. They are two basic functions of this reality...
RODNEY: ...and you've spoken at quite some length about the function of emotion, but you haven't talked a great deal about sexuality, whose function is manifestation...
RODNEY: ...and you stated that we would discuss that at some later time. I read most of the sessions, and I'm not aware that you have spent much time in discussing that particular function.
ELIAS: You are correct.
RODNEY: Then I would like, at our next meeting, to give you the opportunity to discuss that.
ELIAS: Very well.
RODNEY: Is that acceptable to you?
ELIAS: Quite! (Smiling)
RODNEY: Good, then I look forward to it.
ELIAS: Very well.
RODNEY: I thank you so very much.
ELIAS: You are quite welcome, my friend. As always I express tremendous affection to you, and I may express to you an energy of the truth of love in knowing and appreciation of you. And perhaps in allowing yourself to experience that expression of energy from myself, you may allow yourself to express it also to yourself.
RODNEY: Thank you.
ELIAS: I shall be anticipating our next meeting.
ELIAS: To you, au revoir.
Elias departs at 3:52 PM.
(1) Rodney's note: As you can probably tell from the tape, I was pretty much under the weather, both physically and feeling-wise. And even though I come from loving parents, I have to say I have never felt "the truth of love" that I felt in this encounter with this glorious being. Please, if you like, I would like anyone who cares to know this, to hear me say this. Rodney
©2004 Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved
Copyright 2002 Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved.