Becoming Intimate with Self
"Becoming Intimate with Self"
Friday, February 8, 2002 (Private/Phone)
Participants: Mary (Michael) and Anjuli (Miranda)
Elias arrives at 1:21 PM. (Arrival time is 25 seconds.)
ELIAS: Good evening!
ANJULI: Hello, Elias! (Elias chuckles) That was an interesting experience.
ELIAS: And how shall you and I proceed?
ANJULI: I think we go to the island again?
ELIAS: Very well.
ANJULI: (Laughing) Well, actually I had thought that the most part of the session would be about our island snuggle session, because that was, I think, one of the most interesting sessions for me, with the most changes afterwards happening.
ELIAS: Very well.
ANJULI: I liked it so much that I had an imagery around that session, and for this session I thought to use the spaceship imagery again.
ELIAS: Very well.
ANJULI: This time when I thought about the spaceship, I thought my apartment is there; it is a kind of magic apartment. So this apartment is here in this physical dimension, and in truth it is kind of in the spaceship. If I change my attention then it can also be a house on the island or in the city. When I thought about that I had the feeling that I use this imagery to realize that I am not bound to space and to move my attention in a more fun way and in a different way.
The second thing that is different with this spaceship imagery is that this time I imagine that it can be accessed by focuses in different time frameworks, from whichever time framework they want to come there. So I started to use that imagery also to connect with future focuses and also to have an imagination, an inner connection to us in the shift. It does not matter in which time framework we are, to be together on an inner ... like a bubble belonging to this dimension and to all time frameworks of this dimension, which is also an entry to all other desired dimensions, if we like.
ELIAS: Correct, which also allows you more of a recognition of the lack of separation of different focuses, for they are all present and they are all you.
ANJULI: Then when I imagined that I would start to talk in the session about this imagery of meeting you there, I at first thought I probably imagine that I was attending a lecture of you and other essences, and I thought that maybe you talked about duplicity a little bit and sometimes looked into my direction and then I maybe was blushing a little bit, remembering what I became aware of since the last session about my own birds still in the cage! (Elias laughs)
You know what you said in the island session about becoming intimate with myself, I did not want to hear that. (Laughs) I was later quite amused about myself, realizing that I had not liked to hear that.
ANJULI: Then I thought, well, now better I do that. So when doing that, I discovered a few things.
ELIAS: And what have you discovered, my friend?
ANJULI: That was difficult, because I realized that I can't ... well, probably as if the little dog and the big dog are so close together that I kind of move with both of them, and I had troubles to find the difference of what is duplicity and what not. So for example, when I realized "I am a wonderful being and I created so many exciting experiences," what of that is duplicity, like thinking to be less then others or thinking to be more than others, and what is a natural feeling into my own expansion? That was so close together that I had sometimes difficulties to figure that out.
ELIAS: And in relation to your examination of duplicity, do you also offer yourself the recognition of your response to my expression to be creating this intimacy and relationship with yourself in association with your direction in our conversation concerning this island imagery? For in this, my friend, shall you allow yourself to view that your association was that you shall generate more fun in expressing intimacy with another such as myself than would you do in generating that type of expression with yourself? Therein lies an aspect of the duplicity in discounting yourself in the intimacy with self as not measuring to the intimacy that you may experience in relation to another, which is quite the expression of what you have identified in viewing yourself to be less than or more than.
ANJULI: Yes. I felt when I then went into becoming more intimate with myself as if this was a sort of fog which was not allowing me to view what I am kind of, and also later... Well, actually I then went through it, although it sometimes was a little bit challenging because I felt as if by going through that I became a different - no, not a different being. But I watched myself as if I have a personality and I stand outside of that and watch it backwards, how it was feeling and how it was identifying itself with itself in these boundaries, and I was outside of the boundaries and recognized it kind of backwards.
ELIAS: I am understanding - the allowance of yourself to be viewing yourself in different perspectives.
ANJULI: This feeling of becoming somebody different, is that more just expansion or is this also related to a different aspect of myself?
ELIAS: Yes. Not that you are becoming a different individual but that you allow yourself to experience energies and expressions that are objectively unfamiliar to you but that are aspects of you.
ANJULI: So that was what we also talked about in the session before, when we talked about this dream where I had this feeling that this forest woman I merged with was another essence and you said it was an aspect of myself?
ANJULI: Ja, I thought of that. And then I later thought, Elias, as I had this strong desire for a snuggle session and to express this intimacy to you, I thought, well, apparently that's what I desire to do with myself, and so when I feel that you are so important for me or I feel attracted by how you are, this means that I feel interest into that more expanded aspect of myself? You are kind of a reflection of that?
ELIAS: Yes, for you also are essence, and therefore what I express you also express.
ANJULI: Yes. So this is why I sometimes later, when thinking about that session, felt as if I would like to address you by not saying "you" to you, but "you-me" to you and "me-you" to me?
ANJULI: And then I realized that I became aware of me creating this fun, this information that you give and also the fun of the relationship and everything. I created it, and so it is again always about me, that I gave myself the present of this playful fun with you-me?
ELIAS: Yes, and recognizing less separation and therefore also allowing yourself to become objectively more familiar in expressions of intimacy with self, for you are a tremendously diverse being.
ANJULI: And Elias, I was later also very amused when I thought that I had always decided during the sessions that I never have to talk with Elias about that aspect in my writings, that Runi sometimes feels challenged a bit about what Inmi says or she is even a little bit upset about what he says. I thought I will never have to talk with him about that because THIS does not happen! (Both laugh) I was later so amused, and then I thought well, but what I also offer to myself in my book is that first of all that you don't feel challenged by my expressions. That is very comforting. The second thing is that when Runi feels challenged about what he says or when she does not want to hear what he says, it is all about her or something like that, because he always directs her to herself. Then she is very open in her reactions, much more than I was during the sessions, and she also is incorporating humor in that expression of her. I thought I still can learn something of my writings.
ELIAS: Ah, yes!
ANJULI: (Laughs) And of course, Elias, I also create the challenges, and I want them. Because I thought I must have known when I started the snuggle session with you, that to be snuggling with you would bring me to be more intimately related with myself and to all these insights.
ANJULI: That's why I wanted to do it?
ELIAS: Yes. In a manner of speaking, to open a window into yourself. For in recognizing that you also are essence, as am I, in objective terms you allow yourself a trust of our interaction. Therefore, if you may trust our interaction together and you are essence as am I, you may also trust your interaction with yourself.
ANJULI: Yes, exactly, that's what I thought. I thought I have so much trust into that interaction of us. There is not one single corner that I could think of. It's a full trust. And then this must have to do with me, that I know what I have created and I trust that.
ANJULI: Oh, and then Elias, when I thought about this spaceship imagery... So I have attended this lecture about duplicity, and then afterwards I would again watch you interacting with others. I have listened to the other tapes, and I twice mentioned those feelings I have when I have this imagery of feeling you interacting with others. This time I had more insights into that because of also going through your answers. I started to experience it.
Like for example, I felt when I am reading your sessions I don't feel anymore, especially with the newer ones, that they are in another time framework. They are happening now and I feel your attention on me, as if they are written down directly on the screen or are happening directly. In one of your sessions you say that you not only talk to that individual you talk to but also to all the other ones directly, and I for the first time felt how much that is true. I felt directly connected with you, with the you in the sessions.
ELIAS: Correct. I am understanding, for you are allowing yourself an objective experience to validate what I have expressed in explanation of this phenomenon and what is occurring in this energy exchange within this forum in relation to you all. But I may also express to you, this is significant, for this is a movement of turning a concept into an assimilated reality.
ANJULI: Yes. And I felt that whatever session I read, I did that with all the sessions. I was kind of reading that and at the same time creating the experience of it or remembering the experience of it, and I felt that I was able to get much more out of them and to digest much more information.
ANJULI: And that was happening after I went through my duplicity insists and became more intimate with myself. Then I suddenly was feeling so much more openings and I was able to digest so many more things, and they are not just intellectual insights, they are experiences. That is why I thought that after this session so many more changes were happening, because in the past I would have had just one insight with one experience, and it would have taken me quite a while to adjust to that, and now I can do so many things at once or in a short time.
ANJULI: That was because of my starting to be more intimate with myself?
ANJULI: I then kind of adjust my energies and expand them?
ELIAS: Yes, in relation to turning your attention to you rather than projecting it outwardly and concerning yourself with outer expressions of other aspects of your reality or other individuals.
ANJULI: And then, Elias, I also started to read the early sessions, and that was because sometimes you say something in the sessions and then I realize that I do not know what transition is or what dispersed-ness is, and then I read that. So during each session I suggested to myself to read that or that or that because of something happening in the session. This time I wanted to know in more details what you said in all of the sessions about counterparts, of course. That was my main interest. With that I discovered that I am suddenly able to read the early sessions which I was not to that extent before. Then I tried to feel why, and I think if I would have read them before, I would have read them as a concept, and this time this did not happen.
ELIAS: Correct. Which is the point, my friend, for I have expressed many times with individuals that it is efficient to be offering explanation of certain concepts to individuals subsequent to their allowance of experience. For once you have generated experiences, you move the concept into an expression of genuine assimilation and therefore into a reality within your perception, in a genuine understanding of the explanation of what is occurring or what is being generated.
For I may express many concepts to you all, and within the expression of your physical dimension, without the incorporation of the actual experience in association with the concept, you do not fully assimilate the information and generate an objective understanding.
ANJULI: Yes, yes. So I had this insight that in the past I would have probably thought, "Why can I not read the early sessions, why?" I have so much time, I could really read many more sessions, and would have discounted myself for that. With this experience I see that whatever happens it is so perfect, that when I don't feel drawn to them I don't read them, and whenever suddenly it comes up then I read them in a much different way as if I would have forced myself.
ELIAS: Correct. As I have stated previously, this is the evidence of the preciseness of yourselves. You discount yourselves in this physical dimension for you incorporate an objective awareness, and you view that objective awareness as less than or at times as inefficient or even as a detriment to your expression and your movement within your physical reality. But in actuality, as I have continuously stated, the objective awareness moves quite in harmony with the subjective awareness. Therefore, you may allow yourself to view the evidence of how precisely and efficiently you naturally move without analyzation.
ANJULI: Yes. Then this was also happening in the time when I had read just a few sessions and have not yet had a session with you, and then disconnected even with the forum and started to write my book about Runi and Inmi. I remember that at that time I had started to feel unfamiliar or to feel some doubt, like with the essence families or some things, and now when I think back I see how perfect that was to not connect in this way anymore objectively but then going with my inner flow, becoming more intimate with myself, doing my fantasy writings, and then suddenly I made this all happening, like it is happening now.
ANJULI: And Elias, I have now such a fun for you, a fun surprise that happened when I read one of your early sessions! I read the childbirth session, and you asked each individual to explain what kind of child they are giving birth to. A few hours later I had another imagery, because my nephew and his wife got a daughter. So a child was born into my family, and I thought this can't be true! That's just too funny! That's really a STRONG imagery. When I read the session, she started with the childbirth, at that time. (Laughing) This was so funny. I then thought I am going to tell Elias what kind of child I have given birth to, and it is of course me. A few days later I heard what name they are going to give her. You know I am now not using my original name "Sylvia" of this focus, but Anjuli and they don't know it, but they call their daughter Julia. (Laughing, and Elias laughs) And Elias, this was such a fun, because I thought well, when I am doing a snuggle session with Elias on the island and am getting intimately related with you, then of course I am getting pregnant!
ELIAS: Ah! Therefore you are generating quite colorful imagery, are you not?
ANJULI: I think, Elias, in the past I was always saying I love you, and now I must really say I love myself for that! (Elias laughs with Anjuli) Isn't that a great childbirth imagery about myself, and a very powerful one, huh?
ELIAS: Quite excellent!
ANJULI: And then I read the sessions about counterparts, and I discovered that many kinds of counterpart actions are possible. I had not known that. I had thought that's something you do with beings physically present in your time framework. And now I read I can do it with other focuses of myself - they can be counterparts to this focus?
ANJULI: And other focuses of other essences of the past or of the future of this dimension?
ANJULI: And focuses of other essences and of my essence in other dimensions?
ANJULI: Oh, then I wants to create all of that with me and with you! (Elias laughs) I found that to be so exciting, Elias. Well, I thought I don't have to intellectually find out how to do that. I feel my desire and I know that the more unusual things are, the more I trust them. So I would not really trust myself well enough to maybe create money or to get my wall painted, but with really big actions I have quite a lot of trust, I must say.
ELIAS: (Laughs) Therefore you may not necessarily generate the object of currency, but you may allow yourself to manifest an extraterrestrial. Ha ha!
ANJULI: What? I manifest an...?
ELIAS: An extraterrestrial.
ANJULI: (Laughing) Yes! So I was just busy with having fun with imagining what to do. There are so many possibilities of what I can create. I have not thought of these many possibilities. And so, Elias, I thought, well, first of all I can create counterpart actions through my other focuses, new counterpart actions which they so far have not yet done, like past focuses. They are present also, and I suggest something to them and then they create a counterpart action, and I may not be aware of all the details, but it is happening.
ELIAS: If you are so choosing, correct.
ANJULI: If I choose with your past focuses, for example?
ANJULI: And this means that this is similar to when I had sent that imagery to your focus of Oscar Wilde, I kind of created new memories for you and for me?
ELIAS: In a manner of speaking, for you assimilate different experiences. For this is the point of counterpart action, to allow the essence to assimilate many different types of experience in tremendous diversity without actually generating countless physical focuses.
ANJULI: Yes, because when I thought about my few focuses I had thought apparently I can do everything. I could, for example, even suddenly create 2000 focuses, although I so far have just a few. I could even do that?
ANJULI: And then I thought about that and thought it would be tremendous fun because it would be so unusual; but then I thought I like the way my focuses feel, especially this one, of course, this alien feeling. Because I think it triggers something in me. So I was not sure how I would feel if I would suddenly have 2000 focuses. Will I not have this feeling anymore, would it influence this focus for example?
ANJULI: Well, anyway, I thought about all of this and then I thought I can get many experiences of this dimension when I suddenly change my mind and find this dimension to be very interesting by doing counterpart actions with other essences and with you.
ANJULI: And I can, for example, start counterpart actions of my focus with future focuses of you?
ELIAS: In a manner of speaking.
ANJULI: Because the future focuses would probably be aware of that and the past ones not, so I thought that would be fun. Would they be aware of that?
ELIAS: I may express to you, in terms of your linear time framework this essence does not incorporate future focuses that have not fragmented. There have been expressions of future focuses, but those future focuses have fragmented and thusly have been incorporated as their own essences.
ANJULI: All of your future focuses? So you kind of stopped when the shift started? I mean, all focuses went all with your final focus?
ELIAS: In terms of your linear time framework, yes. My involvement, so to speak, with this shift in consciousness has been chosen to be nonphysically participating as it continues and is accomplished.
Therefore yes, in a manner of speaking you are correct. At the onset of this shift in consciousness, the final focus of this essence physically manifest in this dimension chose to be disengaging, and in that time framework all physical manifestations of future focuses chose to be fragmented.
ANJULI: That's interesting. Well, it does not matter. I will for sure find a lot of focuses of you to start counterpart actions with. (Elias laughs)
Elias, I also discovered that I had not thought that you are also a focus, and this was interesting because I realized that when I talk with you this is not like talking with another individual. When I talk with individuals here, I have to put a lot of attention to be aware that they are essence also. Then I discovered that this is because the focuses of those physical essences are creating a separation and I feel that. And with you, this is not. So, I mean, you are a focus in another dimension, but you don't feel like that.
ELIAS: I am understanding, for I am not expressing this generating of separation of attentions. All of the attentions are recognized and realized, and therefore there is no expression of separation in relation to the individual attentions that I express within this essence. In your terms that you may understand objectively, they are interchangeable. Therefore, you recognize the expression of energy that generates no separation.
ANJULI: And Elias, as time is not linear, I thought that in what would be for me a future time I would be disengaging and I would be in transition - or I am already but then I would be even more - and then I would be out of that dimension. Then after a while I would become a nonphysical essence. But as there is no linear time, I am kind of that already?
ELIAS: Correct, simultaneously. For as there is no expression of time in a linear fashion within other expressions of consciousness outside of your physical dimension, I also am physically manifest within your physical dimension.
ANJULI: Yes, that is what I thought. I thought after all, I had not even thought that you are kind of separate from me when I sent this imagery to your final focus, Oscar Wilde. This later occurred to me, that I was not thinking in this direction at all, that you are kind of out of here already or that this focus is in the past. I was just connecting with him.
Now; in a manner of speaking, in relation to that expression, not in association with linear time and in relation to your experimentation in counterpart action, in a manner of speaking you may create a counterpart action with future focuses of this essence that are not fragmented outside of the expression of linear time framework.
ANJULI: Oh, because this means they are in that moment still... Oh, Elias, that's interesting! (Laughs) Yes, because in that time, so to speak, they are still part of you.
ANJULI: Oh, Elias, I have lots of fun with you! (Elias laughs) Yes, and I thought as you are a physical essence kind of too, although you are not, I am a nonphysical also, and I thought it makes lots of sense when I connect with myself as nonphysical essence because you are telling me about intimacy with myself. So I do that - like I connect with you, I can connect with me, and this is what is fascinating for me in you, that I have that too?
ANJULI: And then I can have an energy communication with my nonphysical essence self that is there where you are, kind of?
ANJULI: Or that focus of my essence, like I do with you?
ANJULI: And that's probably why I was becoming aware of that, because me as that nonphysical essence was suggesting that to me?
ANJULI: Oh Elias, that's exciting! (Elias laughs) Then I kind of create new memories of myself, because when I come from the future to this focus and this focus gets connected with the future, I create a new probability or what?
ELIAS: In the moment, yes.
ANJULI: And I create new ones for you also, when I connect with your future focuses which are still belonging to your essence?
ELIAS: In YOUR creation of reality, yes.
ANJULI: How would that feel for you? You would for example...
ELIAS: It is not that you create a new experience per se for me, for you may not create reality for another individual; but in your expression of reality which is your perception, yes, you do create a new experience in your projection of myself, for you create the physical manifestation through your perception.
ANJULI: Oh, yes, like with all other focuses...
ANJULI: ...I connect with, my mother and everybody.
ELIAS: Correct. (Pause)
ANJULI: So for example when I sent this imagery to your focus Oscar Wilde, my projection of him had a new memory? He has been connected with somebody in the future, which is me, but he is not aware of that, and he translated this imagery into whatever kind of fun?
ELIAS: Yes. Your projection of him generates a new memory.
ANJULI: Oh, and then the same is when for example ... well, I am your creation - no - yes. For you, if I switch me-ness...
ANJULI: Then Miranda is your creation?
ELIAS: Yes, in perception, which is relative to physical manifestation.
ANJULI: Could you say it again?
ELIAS: In perception, for perception is relative to physical manifestations. For within nonphysical expressions of consciousness, perception is unnecessary. Perception is an objective expression.
ANJULI: I cannot imagine what that means to have no perception.
ELIAS: Quite! (Laughs)
ANJULI: Is perception something that we need because of this separation thing?
ELIAS: It is what generates your actual physical reality.
ANJULI: So for you everything is energy?
ANJULI: And that means this is a sort of oneness, and this is not something that has something to do with perception?
ELIAS: Correct, for within nonphysical expressions of consciousness there is no objective awareness or expression. This is generated in relation to and relative to physical manifestations.
ANJULI: Aha, then this has something to do with attention and all these kind of things, and when you are everything then you don't use attention, or what?
ELIAS: No, there is quite an expression of countless attentions, but attention is not necessarily objective. Therefore, there is no necessity for perception, for perception is the mechanism, so to speak, of configuring energy in an objective manner to be projecting actual physical manifestations.
ANJULI: Yes, I think I understand that now. So this is for you even not necessary as you interact with me and as you do this energy exchange, although you are having your attention on the energy of what we create or even sometimes on the details of what we physically do, but yet it has nothing to do with perception?
ANJULI: It is an attention of energy?
ELIAS: Yes, and an exchange of energy through these particular attentions.
ANJULI: Then probably for you this does not feel physically at all?
ELIAS: Correct. It is an expression of energy which is projected through layers of consciousness into a translation, a reconfiguration of that energy to be projecting through a physical form, incorporating the design of that physical form and incorporating the familiar expression of communication through language.
ANJULI: Then as you talk with me, you don't experience the body of Michael like I experience mine?
ANJULI: I think I almost can imagine how you feel. I think I already have some little bit of dispersed energy in you. (Elias laughs) Did I put some little bit into you?
ELIAS: To allow yourself an experience within your translated understanding, yes.
ANJULI: Yes, I know. (Giggles) Oh and Elias, I thought about what you said that when you visited me that was a translation, because at first I did not want to hear that because I misunderstood that, kind of.
ELIAS: But all that you experience in relation to energy exchanges, my friend, is a translation.
ANJULI: I figured out that I still had kind of thought that you are doing something, but I think that was at a time when I would not have understood what it means that I create everything and everything is my translation, although your supportive energy or what is there.
ELIAS: Correct. I may be expressing energy projections to you and exchanging energy expressions with you, but your configuration of that is your choice. You, in a manner of speaking, receive that energy projection and filter that through this mechanism of perception, and thusly generate an actual physical reality.
ANJULI: This means, when I am aware of that, then I sort of, if I desire to do so, could translate another visit of you or...
ANJULI: ...if I am experience you in my head talking or whatever, it is my choice of allowance of translating that?
ANJULI: And this would mean if I switch me-ness into my translation of you-ness, then this would mean that there is then more lightness in the interaction with you from your part, when I know of me translating you? I am not sure if I expressed...
ELIAS: I am understanding, and this also is a choice of how you configure the expression of energy. I may express to you quite definitely, my friend, you incorporate the ability through perception to actually generate a physical manifestation of myself if you are so choosing.
ANJULI: Yes, I felt that I can do that.
ELIAS: Which shall be quite solid in physical matter.
ANJULI: (Laughing) Elias, then I will not be able to sleep anymore in any of the coming nights of excitement! (Elias laughs) I certainly will no longer be bored anymore. That is not the problem any more!
Elias, that's such a great fun. I did get intimately related with myself, huh? Because I snuggled with you, and, Elias, that is because there is no difference. That is why I wanted to call you "you-me" and me "me-you."
ANJULI: And that is why I also call you "Inmi" in my writings.
ANJULI: May I sometimes call you Inmi when I feel like that?
ELIAS: If you are so choosing, my friend, this is quite acceptable. Ha ha ha! It matters not.
ANJULI: I forgot the time in which we started. How is Michael feeling? He was shaky a bit in the session before.
ELIAS: Yes, you are correct, and I am acknowledging of you in your allowance in listening to your intuition concerning this energy exchange and allowing yourself an awareness of Michael's energy also, for you are...
ANJULI: Michael said that in the mail I sent him with the money for this session there was the money for two sessions. (Laughs) I had forgotten or I don't know what. But anyway, she already has the money for another session with you.
ELIAS: Very well, and we shall proceed in future interaction.
ANJULI: Elias, did I start with the counterpart action with you already? I tried to.
ELIAS: Yes. Now you may experiment and allow yourself to be aware objectively of what experiences you are allowing yourself to assimilate in this counterpart action.
ANJULI: Then this has also something to do with me suddenly feeling much more wide and having more easiness in reading your sessions.
ELIAS: (Chuckles) Continue, with my encouragement, my friend.
ANJULI: I love you very much, and I will for sure translate you!
ELIAS: Very well, and I express tremendous affection to you also and I shall project an expression of energy to you to your island, and perhaps we shall swim together.
ANJULI: Yes, yes, yes, yes! (Laughs) Oh, Elias, I love you!
ELIAS: Very well, my friend, until our next meeting, I express to you in lovingness, au revoir.
ANJULI: Au revoir.
Elias departs at 2:22 PM.
(1) Anjuli's note: I conducted a session for another individual right before I had this session.
(2) Anjuli's note: I felt a difference in the energy of Elias when he came in, compared with his energy in other sessions. In later sessions I talked with Elias about me feeling those differences in him. When I felt the difference of his energy it was unfamiliar to me, and I felt challenged a bit by it at first.
(3) Anjuli's note: Here my way of expressing changes a lot. I am sounding much more self-confidant and have less troubles with the English. The energy of Elias was different, too.
©2003 Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved
Copyright 2002 Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved.