Sunday, October 28, 2001 (Private/In Person)
Participants: Mary (Michael) and Joanne (Gildae)
Elias arrives at 11:31 AM. (Arrival time is 19 seconds.)

ELIAS: Good morning!

JOANNE: Good morning!

ELIAS: And we meet again!

JOANNE: Yes! (Laughs and then Elias chuckles)

ELIAS: And how shall we play?

JOANNE: Well, I wanted to talk about some things that I’ve been doing - I wanted my life to change - and the things that I was doing to change the pattern. One morning I just had this like throw-away thought, maybe I should get a job. About two hours later the phone rang with a job offer and I took the job, and I went through this whole thing of ’do I really want it or am I getting ready to turn it down because of fear?’ It seems like that’s what I’m doing, like every day I have to remind myself that I want change and to recognize that I’m afraid, too, and just keep going anyway.

The weird thing is, every morning on my way to work I get to this one part in the road and I don’t know where I’m going, and I have to say, ’It’s okay, you know where you’re going.’ I feel like for the first time I don’t really have a plan. I’m not used to operating without a plan, but I’m doing it anyway. I’m trying to move anyway, and I just wanted to know if that’s what I’m doing. Oh, it’s not coming out right! But I think you know what I mean. I want change so badly. I don’t want things to stay the way they were, and I don’t want to be afraid anymore. In objectively taking steps and doing it physically, changing things, is that kind of like mirroring back to me that I am changing things? Is that what I’m doing?

ELIAS: (Smiling and nodding) Yes.

JOANNE: (Laughing) Oh, Mary told you, ’Just say ’yes’ to Joanne! That way she won’t get upset.’ (Both laugh)

ELIAS: I do not receive instructions from individuals within physical focus. Ha ha ha!

JOANNE: Well, I know Mary was a little bit worried about her physical well-being. (Both laugh) But is that what I’m doing by objectively physically taking that job? It’s showing me that I am changing things?

ELIAS: Yes, and offering you an avenue in which you may objectively validate yourself and your choices.

In addressing to fear, individuals create their own methods in how they shall move through an issue of fear. Recognizing that you have created the fear in itself is the initial step, so to speak. Once recognizing that you are incorporating and generating fear issues, you may offer yourself choices in how you may be addressing to it. Many individuals, in like manner to yourself, choose to generate objective physical movement to validate to themselves that they do incorporate the ability to move regardless of the expression of fear, and that this is not in actuality immobilizing.

JOANNE: Right, right, because I feel like I had immobilized myself. I had so many restrictions and limitations and rules and regulations that I couldn’t move at all. I wouldn’t let myself do anything except sit at home for other people (laughs), and I didn’t want that anymore.

ELIAS: You have, in actuality, my friend, been moving consistently in turning your attention more to self, recognizing that previously your attention had been projected quite consistently outwardly and allowing other individuals to dictate to you your choices, and therefore stifling yourself and not offering yourself many choices. But you have been creating a consistent movement for an extended time framework now in which you have allowed yourself to be paying attention to you more and more and actually questioning yourself concerning what YOU want.

JOANNE: We had talked before about ... you had said, ’Well, what do you want?’ and I said, ’I don’t know.’ You said, ’Well, what DON’T you want?’ I am beginning not only to have some things that I don’t want, but the list of things that I want, there’s a few things on that list now. That’s such a big change for me...

ELIAS: Quite!

JOANNE: ...and the feeling that yes, I can do it. The no plan thing is so difficult, and I think that’s why every morning on the way to work it hits me, you know, where are you going? It’s constantly reminding me, ’You don’t have a plan! Where are you going?’ And I’m like, ’It’s okay, it’s okay. I know where I’m going. It’ll be all right.’

ELIAS: This is also physical imagery that you are presenting to yourself that reflects your associations inwardly of your movement. You are not quite sure what direction you are incorporating, for you are moving in unfamiliar areas. But you are trusting yourself and allowing yourself to move, regardless that it is unfamiliar and you are not aware objectively of what you may expect. But you need not incorporate expectations or a plan, and you shall move yourself quite efficiently.

Many times, I may express to you, individuals create a thought process in which they view setting a plan or anticipating an outcome or what you term to be a goal, a destination point, shall be comforting to them. But many times this also incorporates expectations, which creates a tremendous potential for disappointment, for the individual’s direction may not necessarily fit with the plan.

Therefore, what you are creating is allowing yourself an openness to move in whichever direction you are choosing in the moment without incorporating an expectation, and therefore you are lessening the judgments [and] you are offering yourself a greater expression of freedom, for you are not incorporating the association of the right manner or the wrong manner in which you shall proceed. You are merely moving yourself through the fog, trusting and validating yourself that you are steering your ship quite efficiently.

JOANNE: But is that my natural flow of energy? I’m trying to pay attention to that, when I’m feeling it and when I’m not, when I’m in it and when I’m not.

ELIAS: Yes.

JOANNE: I want it to be the kind of thing where there isn’t a plan, it’s just knowing that this is me, and when I feel that, it’s like an indicator to me that I’m doing what I want and not going against it.

ELIAS: Correct.

JOANNE: I’m not even sure what my natural flow is. Every now and then I think I know what it is (laughs), but then I sort of lose it again. But I’m just trying to feel that, and when I feel that, that would kind of mirror back, yes, this is you, this is what you desire, this is what you’re creating. When I’m not feeling it, it should be a clue that I’m trying to force myself to do something that I really don’t want to do.

ELIAS: Correct. You are identifying quite well in relation to an energy flow and what may be viewed as natural to you and what may not. You are allowing yourself the opportunity to pay attention to your energy and your communications. You shall notice, as you have already, in the moments that you are NOT creating a natural flow which is consistent with whichever direction you are choosing in the moment your energy shall move more thickly, and you shall communicate to yourself through emotion. It may not be what may be viewed as a loud emotion, but there is an immediate expression, that which you may term to be twinges, but you do recognize these communications immediately. You may not necessarily objectively create a thought process in analyzing what is being expressed, but you are noticing and this creates a trigger in which you associate and express to yourself, ’Ah, this is a familiar twinge. This is not the direction that I am flowing easily with.’ This also serves to hold your attention upon you.

JOANNE: Right.

ELIAS: You express to your small ones to be creating that, to listen to themselves, to pay attention to themselves. You encourage their movement regardless of what is being expressed outside of them, to trust themselves and to accept their choices. Now you begin offering yourself the same permission.

JOANNE: Right. It’s been different.

I want to change the subject a little bit with the World Trade Center, when that happened. I had noticed for a couple of months before that everything around me, the sky, the trees, the birds, the flowers, everything had a clarity to it that it didn’t have before. On September 11, when that happened, I was at work and I would listen to the radio and then go sit outside and everything felt surreal. I mean, there wasn’t a cloud in that sky; it was beautiful where I was. I could hear the kids at the school around the corner playing and the cars going by and the birds chirping, and it was surreal. It didn’t seem real how the two could be going on at the same time.

I have to say that I was so happy and so excited when all of this was going on. It was so hard on the one hand to think about the people who chose to experience that in leaving, and I wasn’t so much sad for them as their families. But the excitement and the joy that I felt, it was like, ’Yes! It’s happening. It’s moving. It’s all happening! It’s beginning!’ Then seeing the devastation on TV and the people that were so hurt, I did have moments where I was a little leery about what I was feeling, because I felt joy and happiness and excitement and wanted to throw my arms wide and say, ’Yes! Here we go!’ I found it really exciting and that was so difficult.

ELIAS: Quite.

JOANNE: I’ve talked to my mom about it and she understands, but did other people...

ELIAS: Yes.

JOANNE: ...experience that, too? Because so many people were so upset, and here I was, I was kind of disappointed when it all stopped, and god, it’s almost like I feel bad for admitting that. But I was disappointed, I wanted it to keep ’let’s go, let’s move!’ Then when it stopped it was like, ’Oh gosh, here we go. We’re gonna go right back. No, I don’t want to do that!’

ELIAS: And lose your momentum.

JOANNE: Yes, yes. And I...

ELIAS: But you have not lost your momentum. It is continuing, and you are generating tremendous movements in energy and shall continue to do so. This has been merely a catalyst, the initial action to gain your attention en masse. But this has been the spark that has initiated the movement. I am quite understanding of your response and your perception concerning this event, and I may also express to you, yes, there are other individuals that have been and are experiencing very similar types of expressions - not viewing devastation, not creating a perception of negativity or grief.

I may also express to you, many individuals that have generated the type of perception that you have generated also simultaneously incorporate some aspects of guilt and suspicion of themselves in their own expression, for it is quite different from what they perceive to be a mass expression and therefore it does not fit.

JOANNE: Right.

ELIAS: And this creates questioning within the individual: ’Why do I not fit? Why am I expressing differently? What may be the matter with myself that I shall perceive in this manner?’ but continuing to allow yourself that perception and not altering it.

JOANNE: No, I didn’t feel the need to change it. I just found myself turning it down a little bit when I was with other people so that they didn’t look at me like I was thoroughly nuts. I thought it was a private thing and I didn’t necessarily have to share it with everybody.

ELIAS: Quite!

JOANNE: But it was how I felt.

ELIAS: Quite. I may be quite acknowledging of you in creating that perception, for in actuality you are correct. This has been quite symbolic objectively in genuinely offering an experience to tremendously move energy in the direction of this shift in consciousness.

JOANNE: That one transcript, after everything happened when you talked about the airplane and the movement and the speed, it was like that’s how I ... I didn’t objectively put it into those words, it was just feelings that hit me. But it was beautiful and it was exciting and it was joyful and I loved it. I was, as I said, disappointed when it stopped, and that was, you know ... and then you think about 6000 people, and not so much them but their families, and it’s like oh-oh, how can you feel happy and joyful and want it to continue, and yet there was that. So that was interesting.

ELIAS: But this also lends energy in what you may term to be helpfulness to all of these other individuals, these families, so to speak, that they may also be examining their perceptions. Death is not an ending. It is merely an expression of your beliefs that you view it to be cause for sorrow.

JOANNE: I’ve kind of gotten to the point where the person who chose to disengage, I’m happy for them. I’m a little envious of that experience because I haven’t chosen that yet. I feel bad for their families because of their sorrow and their missing things, but for the actual person I feel joy for them. At funerals that gets a little difficult. (Both laugh) It’s kind of hard to say, ’Yeah, go!’ to the person who died, and then to the family, ’Gee, I’m sorry for your loss.’ It’s so totally different.

ELIAS: But are you sorry for the loss? Do you perceive it to be a loss?

JOANNE: No, I don’t, but I feel like I know what they’re feeling.

ELIAS: Correct. I am understanding. (Smiling broadly) Perhaps offer yourself permission to be tapping into your perceived Irish heritage and allow yourself...

JOANNE: Ah, the wakes! Oh, yes!

ELIAS: ...and allow yourself permission to celebrate! (Chuckles)

JOANNE: I know the last few funerals I’ve been to have ... they were Catholic, and there was a lot more laughter at the funeral. They weren’t the somber, silent things that they were that I remember when I was little and going to church with the incense and all of the stuff like that. Now there’s a little bit of laughter in the background and people laughing and talking. Then you can talk about the person who died and laugh about some of the things that they did. So it is different now. I don’t feel so bad when I get this urge to laugh or I actually do laugh out loud in the church (Elias chuckles), and feel like, oh god, everybody’s looking. So it’s a little bit more relaxed where that’s concerned, but it definitely has changed.

About a week or so after that happened I started to get sick. I had this dream that I was on the phone with my mother and I looked out the window and on the condensation on the window ’911’ was written, and I heard this voice yell, ’911, call 911 NOW!’ And I got off the phone with my mom and I called 911 but I didn’t know what I was supposed to say or which 911, or what. As that was happening I started getting sicker, and I knew that there were four people still alive in that building. One I didn’t see, it was just an awareness. One was a woman just sitting, leaning up against the wall. Another gentleman was standing by a postcard rack outside of a shop. The fourth one, his name was Robert, I think that was a focus of mine that disengaged. He was a fireman.

ELIAS: Observing essence, yes.

JOANNE: Observing, okay. (Pause) For those few days I felt really connected, and it was really interesting because I found myself going through a lot of things you worry about, things you feel like you have to do, like you can’t go, the bills aren’t paid, who’s going to take care of the kids, oh my god I have to do this, I have to do that, I have to do this, and I was going through that myself. The kids will be fine. Somebody else will have to pay the bills. Don’t worry about this; it’s all okay. And I was doing that, and it was a very, very strange experience.

The one night I was having a really hard time breathing. I would go off to sleep and the images were wild, and I don’t even remember a lot of them. I remember talking about essence and final focus and fragmentation and just bits and pieces of things, and then overwhelming anxiety, I can’t breathe, and then okay, it’s okay. I thought somehow whatever Robert was going through I was going through a portion of it, not the whole thing, but maybe in a way taking the edge off for him. I don’t know how to explain it.

ELIAS: I am understanding. In actuality, it is the reverse.

JOANNE: It’s the reverse. (Emotionally) He was taking the edge off for me. I didn’t think ... I just knew that after he disengaged I thought, ’Okay, now what did you get out of this?’

ELIAS: QUITE.

JOANNE: And I thought, ’Nobody dies alone.’ Nobody dies alone; there is never more than you can handle; feelings, even feelings of fear and anxiety and pain, are just feelings. They’re not what kills you.

ELIAS: No.

JOANNE: Those things are not all that we make them to be. They’re all okay and feelings don’t kill you. Pain does not kill you. Hurt, anger, anxiety, they don’t kill you. That was such a revelation to me! And that nobody dies alone.

ELIAS: And express to me now what other impressions have you offered to yourself in this experience, recognizing that you have allowed yourself an openness and you have allowed yourself to generate this lack of separation between yourself and this individual, and that this individual in actuality is lending YOU energy to create more of an ease for you choose to continue within physical focus. What has been the offering of energy which allows an affectingness?

JOANNE: I didn’t see it as giving something to me. It was...

ELIAS: It IS an exchange, my friend, you are correct. You are lending energy to the other individual in the recognition of no separation, and your assessment of not being alone is correct also in an expression of energy to the other individual which has been received. But the other individual, recognizing the choice to disengage in the moment, has also offered energy to you in the recognition that you choose to continue within this physical dimension. In a significant manner there has been energy lent to you which has been received, and you are generating different movement in association with what we have been discussing this morning concerning fear. His offering of energy to you is the expression that it matters not.

JOANNE: Right, the fear is just the fear. (Pause) It’s so hard for me to think of someone giving something to me. It’s okay for me to give...

ELIAS: Quite.

JOANNE: ...but to receive is very difficult for me. I didn’t even think of that. It was okay for me to be there and help. (Laughs)

ELIAS: Let me offer the suggestion to you that you may incorporate a brief interaction with Michael and merely question Michael concerning his perception concerning receiving. It is worthy of noting.

But I am understanding what you are expressing. This is, once again, a very strongly expressed mass belief which is associated with religious beliefs that...

JOANNE: Better to give than to receive.

ELIAS: Quite, and that you shall be selfless and be offering to others and not pay attention to self. But you have accepted the offering of energy and you have allowed it to be affecting within your choices, and in this, what it has facilitated in your generation of energy is what you may term to be a new expression of confidence, which is validating to you.

JOANNE: Well, you said I was going to be exploring my power.

ELIAS: Quite, and you are.

JOANNE: It’s like that other transcript, I think it was #740, where you told someone everything is you, the money is you and stuff. What you just said about him giving to me and my problem with receiving ... I kept thinking, ’Well okay, so the money is me. So give it to me, give it to myself.’

ELIAS: Quite.

JOANNE: And boy, did that bring me up short! Because how can you give it to yourself? You know, why would you give it to yourself? Shouldn’t you give it to someone else, or...? (Elias chuckles) So it was difficult, and then I thought, ’Well, I just had my birthday, so it’s okay to give it to me now because it’s my birthday!’

ELIAS: Therefore you are incorporating an objective reason.

JOANNE: Yes, there’s a good reason why I should give it to myself. But this is interesting, so I can ... okay.

ELIAS: But you are always worthy of offering to yourself. You are no less than any other individual that you shall give to.

JOANNE: Right. I have to go into those belief systems because they’re ... I haven’t gone there yet. (Elias chuckles) Nowhere near that one yet!

ELIAS: Ah, I may express to you, my friend, you may be nearer than you realize.

JOANNE: Oh, good! That’s encouraging, because that’s an eye-opener, what you said about that, that he was giving to me, because that never entered my mind. I thought I was the helper, the giver, and didn’t ... I was really proud of myself that I did stop and think, ’Okay, now what are you getting out of this,’ which was a big change...

ELIAS: Yes.

JOANNE: ...but I didn’t take it that one other step and see that. But that’s incredible. So this was an essence that I was just an observing essence...

ELIAS: Correct.

JOANNE: ...but not actually a focus of mine?

ELIAS: Correct.

JOANNE: Because I know I have two others in this time period, and the name Robert has always been there. I’ve never connected it to anybody, but it was so strong I thought that must be the Robert, but there’s probably another Robert somewhere. (Elias chuckles) That may either have something to do with you or with Rastin, I’m not sure which, but we’ll save that for another time. (Elias chuckles)

ELIAS: Very well. I may express to you, this is quite an interesting offering of experience that you have allowed yourself, and also creates many avenues that you may allow yourself to explore: exchanging energy, allowing yourself openness, allowing yourself to thin the veils of separation between yourself and other individuals or other essences, and also to be re-evaluating and redefining some associations that previously have been held quite strongly in association, choices and movements and actions and absolutes and also expectations.

JOANNE: Well, I’m finally thinking it’s okay to be me.

ELIAS: And you are quite correct.

JOANNE: But that took a while! (Laughs)

ELIAS: You are quite worthy of yourself, my friend.

JOANNE: Well, thank you.

I’ve had this conversation with you a million times. (Elias chuckles) You’ll probably remember it; it’ll sound familiar. But ever since I was little I always thought I came here for a very special reason. I don’t know if this is a remembrance of essence or if it’s something in particular, but that I came here for a special reason, for a particular reason, and finding this information was like the beginning of finding out what that is and what it’s all about.

ELIAS: And discovering YOU...

JOANNE: Is that the special reason?

ELIAS: ...shall be your avenue in discovering what you associate with your special reason. For in discovering you and becoming familiar with you and allowing yourself to be accepting and trusting of you and thusly generating the radiance of the straight little sapling, your movement shall be directed quite differently, my friend.

You are correct in your association, for in this, as I have stated previously in this forum, each of you chooses to manifest in this physical dimension with a pool of probabilities, so to speak, which are not actual probabilities but the potential. In this potential you do choose a direction, and as I have also expressed, generally speaking individuals within physical focus do not move outside of their pool of probabilities. Some individuals do, but it is not common.

In this, some individuals are clearer, in a manner of speaking, concerning their direction, their intent. They may not objectively in terms identify it, but some individuals in their pool of probabilities that they have chosen have also allowed themselves more of a clarity from the onset of their manifestation and consistently generate movement that is more obviously recognized as expressions of their intent.

Each individual incorporates a pool of probabilities, and each individual incorporates an intent, their direction. Some individuals create, figuratively, a cloudedness within their pool of probabilities temporarily, and each individual may choose, if they are incorporating that cloudedness, for what duration, so to speak, they shall potentially create that.

Now; I may identify within you and your energy and your expressions in this focus, your pool of probabilities has been chosen almost to be half and half, so to speak. What you have chosen is to create the cloudedness of the objective recognition of the movement of your intent in this focus in the first half of the focus, so to speak, mirroring your placement physically in linear time framework in this physical dimension; in a manner of speaking, symbolic imagery to yourself within your previous century has been your first half. And although you are generating your intent, your awareness of it was clouded, which is not bad; it is merely a choice. But you also offered yourself a trigger, a knowing from the onset of this focus almost as an expression of a key that you may hold, expressing to yourself your recognition of some thing or some movement special.

The accomplishment of that begins now. For now you move into what you express as the second half, paralleling the shift in your new century, and in the second half of your focus you blow away the cloudedness and begin the clarity of self. In generating the clarity of self and moving into the acceptance and trust, you also alter your perception and allow yourself to begin objectively obviously generating your intent in a different manner.

Now; this is also significant, for it symbolically creates imagery in like manner to the subjective movement of the previous century, which appears less clear, and the objective movement of this century - the subjective movement of the shift within your previous century, and the insertion in this century. You have quite efficiently mirrored all of these actions in your choice of your direction in this focus.

JOANNE: Wow! So...

ELIAS: Quite creative.

JOANNE: When I found this information, I knew, and what I felt inside, it was the same thing as September 11 - I could’ve hugged the world! It was like, ’Yes, this is it!’ (Elias chuckles)

ELIAS: This has been your stepping stone, my friend.

JOANNE: I had to hurry up and wait for this for a long time! (Both laugh) Oh, god. Okay, cool, that’s really cool. But you don’t know what IT is, or you’re not going to tell me what it is, ’cause I haven’t figured out what it is yet anyway, right?

ELIAS: And this shall negate your surprise to yourself.

JOANNE: Right, yeah. Okay, I’d rather have the surprise! (Elias chuckles) I get to throw my arms wide and say, ’Yes, this is it!’

ELIAS: And experience your elation once again.

JOANNE: That’s pretty cool.

I had a cricket experience which was really interesting. I went to bed one night, I was trying to listen to a tone in my ear, and suddenly I heard crickets. I knew there weren’t any crickets in my pillow or in my bedroom. Even if I stuck my fingers in my ear I still heard the cricket. I toyed with the idea that maybe there was a cricket really IN my ear, so I thought if that happens again I’ll just go to the emergency room and have my ear checked by a doctor.

The next night I kept waking up, and I was making the noise. I don’t know how I was doing it, but the third time it woke me up it was really loud. I was really making the noise. The only thought I had along with it was, ’Oh, so that’s how you do it.’ The roof of my mouth hurt from making the sound. (Elias laughs) The night before when I was hearing it, ’it’s only you’ was the only impression or information I gave myself. Everybody says it’s a connection to another dimensional focus or...

ELIAS: No. This moves quite in conjunction with the other experiences that you are generating presently and recently, in offering yourself expressions of thinning this veil of separation, genuine recognition that all that is created within your physical dimension is a generation of you.

This is another manner in which you are allowing yourself a fuller recognition of you and what you are, and also validating to yourself that in reality you are generating ALL of your universe. You are creating all of this; therefore it is ALL an expression of you. There is no separation. You are all of these expressions. You are all of these things, so to speak.

JOANNE: Okay, I’m not there yet. (Elias laughs) I still don’t even believe I’m me half the time! But that’s okay!

ELIAS: And as I have expressed to you, you are closer than you realize.

JOANNE: Sometimes I get the feeling it’s right there, I just have to actually turn my attention to it. It’s just the fear again, if it is me really looking at me, and not being afraid of that, being afraid of me.

ELIAS: I am understanding.

JOANNE: That’s cool.

Milumet - I love Milumet! (Elias laughs) I love that. I think my Mom had told you that I WANT to speak for Milumet, and some of the information that I’ve gotten is that it’s not going to be one person from Milumet. Is it like one person from each family, in the intent of the family they’re aligned with, offering information? I’m a Teller. I’m not a teacher; I’m not a Speaker. I’m a Teller - I love to tell things to people.

ELIAS: Challenge yourself, my friend, with a new exploration of creativity and openness, and allow yourself in your tremendous appreciation of the expression of this family to discover your language.

JOANNE: The cricket! Is that ... no, that’s Ilda, right? Is it Ilda?

ELIAS: Partially. The recognition of the creatures and all that you generate as being aspects of you, this is genuine spirituality, and there is incorporated a type, so to speak, of language that is generated by the essences comprising this family. It is not necessarily similar to what you and I are engaging presently in language but incorporates quite beautiful tones that resonate with all that is created within what you perceive to be your universe.

JOANNE: I’ll investigate that. It’s so weird, because I’ve been having this strange urge to lay face down in the grass. (Laughs) I haven’t done it yet, but that’s another part of the communication.

ELIAS: Yes, and you are offering yourself experiences in thinning these veils of separation to feel, so to speak, the tones. This is the reason that I offer the suggestion to you that you allow yourself to incorporate your creativity and explore this language, for it is expressed in tones.

JOANNE: Which family is it, is it the Ilda or...

ELIAS: Milumet.

JOANNE: Milumet, okay. Because I was trying to talk to the trees, but crickets are cool! (Both laugh) I thought, you know, trees ... oh, forget that! But I didn’t think it would be crickets! Like little Jiminy Cricket, okay. That’s pretty cool. That’s really cool.

But it’s neat, because I didn’t even connect wanting to lay face down in the grass and just feel it and smell it. I’ve just sort of been pushing that aside. It’s been really a strong pull lately, and I really never felt that connection before.

ELIAS: This also is an aspect of your emergence.

JOANNE: Yes, because when I first read about Milumet I knew it right away, I loved it. But the part with the earth and the animals and stuff I just kinda pushed off to the side, because I never thought I had an affinity with animals or with the earth and things like that. I didn’t like dirt and...

ELIAS: The clouded, the clarity. (Opening one hand and then the other)

JOANNE: Oh, okay.

ELIAS: The first half, the second half. (Repeating the hand gesture)

JOANNE: That is so cool! (Elias chuckles) I’m so glad I did this.

Oh, I didn’t call home last night! (Laughs)

ELIAS: And I gather I shall be acknowledging and congratulating of you!

JOANNE: Oh, thank you. See, this is so different. I mean, I’ve been away from home a few times, the kids and everything, but I’ve never not called home, and I did not call home. It didn’t even occur to me. I was having a good time.

ELIAS: Perish the thought!

JOANNE: I know, well ... this morning I was like I CAN have a life!

ELIAS: Incorporating freedom and fun...

JOANNE: Yes, instead of worry...

ELIAS: ...such a concept!

JOANNE: ...and anxiety and being so wrapped up in their lives. It was pretty cool. I didn’t call home last night, yes! I didn’t not call home on purpose, it just ... the best part was it didn’t even occur to me. And I like that, I really like that!

ELIAS: Very well, my friend.

JOANNE: It’s been really great talking to you. I talk to you all the time.

ELIAS: I am aware! Ha ha ha!

JOANNE: But I really like this. Oh, one more thing. Is that you with the streetlights?

ELIAS: At times. (Chuckles)

JOANNE: Would that be the times I ask you to turn them off and you don’t (laughs), or when it’s just a surprise and I look up and the lights go off? But not when I stand there and ask the light questions, like blink once for yes, twice for no.

ELIAS: Correct.

JOANNE: It’s just the surprise of the things. (Both laugh) Okay, cool. That’s great. Thank you so much.

ELIAS: You are quite welcome, my friend.

JOANNE: And you CAN just show up in the backyard at the table and sit down and talk to me. I mean, I might scream initially, but I’ll get over it. The fear is okay. It won’t kill me. I’ve learned that. (Both laugh)

ELIAS: Very well, I shall incorporate this in consideration! (Laughs) I offer you tremendous affection, as always.

JOANNE: I love you.

ELIAS: And I offer you great encouragement.

JOANNE: Thank you.

ELIAS: Remember, you are deserving and worthy of your expressions also.

JOANNE: Thank you.

ELIAS: To you in lovingness, au revoir.

Elias departs at 12:33 PM.

(1) The last phrase was originally worded as ’...and that this is not in actualization immobilizing.’

(2), 12/15/00-2.

(3) Joanne is Milumet/Ilda.

(4) ’Cricket’ has been entered in The Game, in the Insect category under the Ilda family. Go to for an explanation of The Game, and see for an index of the Game board categories and links to the Game board.

©2003 Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved

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Copyright 2001 Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved.