Being Both Present and Self-Aware: Examples and Definitions
Topics:
“Being Both Present and Self-Aware: Examples and Definitions”
“Setting Goals Is Setting Intention”
“Following Feelings: How to Know to Stop”
“Foresight and Interconnectedness”
“How to Identify Your Desire”
Monday, October 24, 2022 (Private)
Participants: Mary (Michael) and Ann (Vivette)
(Audio starts partway through session)
ANN: Okay, here we go. Okay, so tell me about setting goals.
ELIAS: Very well.
ANN: Okay.
ELIAS: Setting goals is simply a matter of setting an intention. It IS an intention; and in that, it’s the same thing. And when you do that, if you aren’t concentrating on that outcome, you more likely are concentrating on the process. You have the goal, you have the outcome that you want to accomplish in a day, and in that then you are paying attention to the process of accomplishing that.
ANN: Yes.
ELIAS: And that’s not being not present.
ANN: Okay.
ELIAS: That IS being present — or it’s a part of being present.
ANN: Of being present. Yeah.
ELIAS: And in that, I would also say that in addition to setting that goal or that outcome that you want to happen and moving in a process, also don’t discount yourself if you are distracted and you move in a different direction in a tangent. That doesn’t mean you’re not being present either.
ANN: That’s good, because that’s how I roll.
ELIAS: You’re simply being distracted from “this” process and “this” goal or “this” outcome, and you’re looking at something else, but you’re still being present with that something else.
ANN: So when you’re not present you’re thinking about the past or the future, we know that. Is that it? Are there other times you’re not present?
ELIAS: Yes. There’s many, and in that, if you are concentrated on something else, someone else, you’re not being present. If you are… Let us say when you were on the boat, if you had any time framework that you were distracted and concentrated on the boat and being concerned about that, and then automatically projecting what’s going to happen —
ANN: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, worrying about what’s going to happen. Is that a projection?
ELIAS: Yes.
ANN: The worries?
ELIAS: Yes. Yes. That’s all not being present.
ANN: Right.
ELIAS: I would say that most of the time when you’re not being present, it’s when you’re paying attention to someone else, or you’re paying attention to a situation that is distracting you from you, and when you are projecting in any… in ANY direction.
ANN: So what about if you get lost in a book or a movie? Are you present then? Or not?
ELIAS: You can be. You can be.
ANN: Like if you’re not aware of yourself because you’re so involved in this story.
ELIAS: Being present doesn’t mean that you’re always thinking about yourself.
ANN: Okay.
ELIAS: You might be very absorbed in a book or in a movie and still being present because you’re experiencing now.
ANN: Oh. Okay. So that’s the big component to being present, is experiencing now. Okay.
ELIAS: Therefore, that piece of being very absorbed in a story or being very absorbed in a movie – or even in a conversation with another individual – that doesn’t mean you’re not being present. It’s when you are distracted to the point that you’re not aware of you at all – and that doesn’t mean not being absorbed in a story. It means, usually with other people, that you’re so concentrated on what they’re doing and them that you lose sight of you entirely.
Or, another easy example would be if your vehicle is malfunctioning, and you’re so absorbed in the dysfunction of the vehicle and then following feelings about that that you’re not being present at all, and you’re not being aware of you.
In this also, any time you are following feelings, you’re not being present and you’re not paying attention to you. Even though you THINK you’re paying attention to you, because you’re caught up in your thinking and you’re moving between the thinking and the feeling, back and forth, you think you’re paying attention to you but you’re not.
ANN: Yeah. I’m not very clear on following feelings. (Laughs) I mean, sometimes I know when I’m following feelings, it’s very clear, but I guess I don’t know when I’m not following feelings. So if I’m not following feelings, is there a general state of being I’m going to be in? Will I have a feeling if I’m not following…? I COULD have feeling, –
ELIAS: You could.
ANN: I just might not follow it.
ELIAS: Correct.
ANN: Because it could signal it.
ELIAS: Correct.
ANN: But…
ELIAS: Give an example of when you know you’re following a feeling.
ANN: Well, at the time I didn’t, but now I really did, –
ELIAS: Very well.
ANN: – with that whole situation with John. That was a big old feeling, and I was like… Yeah, I followed feelings, big time. But I thought about that, because I was thinking, “Oh maybe if I hadn’t followed my feelings, I might have known that he was safe. I might have been able to access that information.”
ELIAS: You likely could have. But in that, give a different example that we can look at in your confusion about what isn’t following a feeling.
ANN: Yeah, okay. So another time when I know I’m following feelings… I mean, the easy, constant one for me is anxiety, like if I worry about, let’s say… Oh! Okay, we get the bid to put siding on the house and it’s like three times what we were expecting it to be, and my heart goes “Ooooooh!” And then I realized I was following feelings, because I started to go down the rabbit hole: “Oh, this could break, that could break, and all of a sudden all this stuff could go wrong, I can’t control it and we’ll end up living in the street.” I mean, that’s very exaggerated, but… So I did start to follow feelings, and I had to really get on myself to get out of that. Now I’m paying more attention, and when I go into that anxiety I try to nip it in the bud, but yeah, that’s probably one of my biggest – anxiety – when I follow feelings.
ELIAS: Now, when you do that – when you first notice the anxiety, and you first notice that you’re beginning to think about it and you’re beginning to move in a direction of “what if, what if, what if,” and “this can happen, this can happen, that can happen” – when you first notice that you’re doing that and you’re still feeling the anxiety, do you actually stop and ask yourself, “What am I doing in this moment?” Or do you simply — “
ANN: Well, I haven’t in the past, but I’ve just started to do that.
ELIAS: Very well.
ANN: I simply distract myself.
ELIAS: That’s what I’m asking.
ANN: Yeah. Yeah.
ELIAS: Because this is what most people do. They notice, and then they say, “No, no, no, I’m not going to do this, I’m not going to do this, I’m not going to do this.”
ANN: That’s exactly what I do.
ELIAS: And that doesn’t work.
ANN: You have to— Oh! Can I tell you? Think you’re right! (Elias laughs) Because… Okay, so we’re driving here, and I had this weird pain like right there. This is like aargh, pain. And then I said to myself, I go, “Oh! Pain’s a feeling.” So I go, “What am I doing?” And you had told me sometimes that’s all I have to do, is ask that question. So I just said, “Okay, what am I doing?” and the pain stopped. Can you believe it? It was funny. I said, “Okay! Maybe Elias is onto something.” (Elias laughs) “What am I doing?” So I have recently started doing that, but I appreciate the reminder, because some of this stuff is just habit, habit, habit. I’ve been doing it my whole life.
ELIAS: It is.
ANN: But, yeah. The reminders help.
ELIAS: It is habit. And that’s the reason that I’m asking the question.
ANN: Yeah. That’s exactly what I do.
ELIAS: Because —
ANN: Or did.
ELIAS: Yes. Because in that, moving in that direction—
ANN: Is no good.
ELIAS: — definitely is not going to be successful. It doesn’t work.
ANN: Yeah. Yeah.
ELIAS: And telling yourself you’re not going to do something is definitely not going to be successful. It doesn’t matter what it is, you can tell yourself, “I’m not going to do this any longer.” People do this very frequently in relation to food: “I’m not going to eat that anymore.”
ANN: And then they eat it.
ELIAS: And then they do. (Ann laughs) Or “I’m not going to eat sugar anymore,” and then they do.
ANN: (Whispers) Guilty.
ELIAS: And in that, that’s because telling yourself that you’re not going to do something, you AND YOUR BODY – you reinforce it with your own body —
ANN: Yes. Yes.
ELIAS: — reject that and rebel against it. You don’t want to be told what to do and what not to do, even by yourself. You don’t want to tell YOURSELF what not to do. It’s almost an expression of you have the automatic association – and you all do – of, “My freedom is being infringed on.”
ANN: Oh, I know I have that.
ELIAS: “I’m not being allowed my freedom of choice, if I’m telling myself I’m not going to do that anymore or I can’t do that anymore or I won’t do that anymore.” Because in the moment, you might even remember that you told yourself you’re not going to do that anymore, and in the moment you’ll express to yourself (slightly mocking), “Well, I’ll do it now. I won’t do it later. It’s not THAT important. I can do it a couple of times. It’s not going to be that big of a deal, and it’s not going to be affecting me or harming to me – and even if it does, it will only do it a little bit. It won’t matter.” And in that, you will give yourself excuse after excuse after excuse why you CAN do it now and don’t do it later. It doesn’t work.
ANN: It’s like you understand people, Elias. (Both laugh)
ELIAS: It’s a matter of recognizing that doesn’t work. That’s the reason that it’s so important not to skip that step of “What am I doing in this moment? What is my statement?” It’s not an explanation. It’s one small statement: “I’m projecting.” “I’m not being present.” “I’m personalizing.” “I’m assuming.” “I’m judging, and then judging myself for judging.” (Both laugh) It is a matter of what you are doing, and that statement is telling you what you are doing.
In this, it’s also a matter of having information and understanding. Let us say that you have a feeling, you’re uncomfortable and you realize the statement is “I’m being judgy.” And you stop, and you look at the situation and you’re assessing, “Yes, I’m judging this.” But in that, whatever it is that you’re doing, the reason you have that feeling to alert you to it isn’t necessarily for you to stop it; it’s simply for you to know what it is that you’re doing.
Therefore let’s use that example, as you’re making a judgment about someone else, and in that, you stop, you realize you’re making this judgment about someone else. That might actually be correct or true for you, and in that, it’s merely an alert telling you, “Very well. Look at that. Don’t take it a step farther. Don’t expect the other individual to change something to match you. Don’t take it that next step in which you’re moving beyond the initial judgment, which is acceptable.”
It’s about your guidelines. Therefore, it’s not about you never have a judgment; you have your own opinions. In that, it’s about alerting yourself not to move the next step and then be projecting about the other individual and expecting them to do something different.
In this, it doesn’t matter what the feeling is that is alerting you, and it doesn’t matter what the statement actually is, it’s what you do with it. But how the statement matters is, you don’t know what to do with it if you don’t know what it is. Therefore, you can’t make a choice that is to your greatest benefit if you don’t even know what the statement is or what your choices are. Therefore what you’ll do instead is simply react and then begin to follow feelings in those directions, beyond the reaction.
The reaction is the first piece. That’s your alert. Therefore, what I would say to you is, regardless of what the feeling is, how you… how you know to stop is, “Am I reacting to something?” If you’re reacting to something, that feeling is alerting you to that. It doesn’t matter what the feeling is. If you’re having a reaction to something, whatever you’re feeling was alerting you to that reaction, and then you can look at “What am I reacting to? What am I doing?” But if you can stop simply by noticing that you’re reacting to something, and to stop that before it moves any farther, to notice “I’m having a reaction. Very well, what am I doing?”, that is an easier direction of how to identify that you could be moving in the direction of following feelings if you keep moving past the reaction.
ANN: So I think that’s easier to understand, as you say, when they’re not good feelings, but just for curiosity, like when you’re having a good feeling, let’s say someone comes and gives me a surprise and my reaction would be, “Oh! Da-da-da!” And then you say, but we don’t usually follow those feelings.
ELIAS: You don’t.
ANN: But would it also be helpful to say, “Am I reacting to something?” when I get happy? Or Is it even necessary, because I don’t follow it?
ELIAS: It isn’t necessary —
ANN: Because I’m not following it.
ELIAS: — because you won’t follow it.
ANN: Right.
ELIAS: When it’s necessary when you have a good feeling is when you react and then you move in the next step past the reaction, when you react to something good and the next step past that is to be compelled to want to keep that feeling happening.
ANN: Oh.
ELIAS: To want to do more of whatever it is that you’re doing, that if you do something… Let’s say that you give someone a gift, and they react very excited and they’re very happy and they’re very grateful, and you feel very good. It’s very gratifying because of their response to you giving them a gift.
Now; if you react to their reaction, meaning if you don’t simply feel gratified but if you begin to feel compelled to do something more, that “Oh, they’re reacting so positively to this, this is so tremendous, I’ll give them something else. I’ll do it again. This is tremendous. This is terrific that they’re so happy. I’ll make them more happy.”
ANN: And there again you’re outside of yourself —
ELIAS: Most definitely.
ANN: Focused on them. Right.
ELIAS: Yes. And then you’re following feelings. Now what happens with that, this is what I have expressed previously, that even good feelings, if you follow them, they’ll turn and it won’t be good. You won’t be happy.
ANN: Is that addictions? Or is that something different?
ELIAS: It can be. It doesn’t necessarily have to be, but it can definitely be. But in that, I would say that it doesn’t matter what the feeling is. If you are moving in a direction of thinking about it and then moving in tangents and remembering things, accessing memories in relation to the experience – even with good experiences, the difference with good feelings that you don’t follow [is] you don’t think about them. You feel it, and you’re happy about it, but you’re not actually thinking about it.
ANN: Okay, so this is maybe a little tweak or a nuance or… Like I know sometimes you said Abraham or Bashar give us these shortcuts, but Abraham has this thing, she’s like, “You get a good feeling” and she goes, “Milk it! Milk the feeling. Just keep it coming.” Because I don’t know if it’s their philosophy or it’s their advice is if you feel better you’re going to then attract better things that you want in your life because… So the question is —
ELIAS: That’s a simplification.
ANN: Yeah.
ELIAS: But it is the same as —
ANN: But are you following feelings?
ELIAS: — you create what you—
ANN: You think about. You concentrate on.
ELIAS: — pay attention to. Yes.
ANN: But milking a feeling in that respect, would that be considered following a feeling?
ELIAS: It very well could.
ANN: Interesting. But then you’re also choosing to do it, I think. Yeah.
ELIAS: Because people don’t… Yes, but people follow feelings so automatically that that could be considerably confusing.
ANN: (Whispers) I know, it IS confusing. It’s all confusing. (Elias chuckles) I get it. I’m getting it a little bit. I mean, I understand things, and I know, even before you brought this up again from the beginning of when I have started talking to you until now, I have a lot of times stopped following feelings and made different choices. I mean, I still think I do it a lot, but I can think of times when I didn’t do it, when I made choices that I wanted to make, not based on my feeling but the choice I wanted to make. So I know I’m getting it.
ELIAS: Yes, you are.
ANN: All right, before we go too much into it, since I didn’t record it earlier, I think Mutha would appreciate hearing it from you, so if you’d just verify his dream trigger is a book?
ELIAS: Is a book.
ANN: Is a book, good. Okay. I wanted to get that down for the record. (Elias laughs)
All right. So now, presence, following feelings: Let’s talk about this thing that is so nebulous to me that I’m not even sure… I mean, I guess I understand conceptually, but let’s talk about foresight.
ELIAS: Very well.
ANN: So that’s kind of the next step: Once you are present, you’re aware when you’re following feelings, you’re making intentional choices, then you’re ready for foresight, right?
ELIAS: It automatically happens.
ANN: Oh, it automatically happens. So, I don’t really have to do anything to work on getting foresight, I just have to… Well, just being present and not following feelings, and then it just happens. It really just happens?
ELIAS: Not all the time, but it will automatically happen. And in that, the more you are self-aware – it’s not only being present, it’s being self-aware and being present – but the more you are self-aware, remember, the more you are genuinely, experientially aware of interconnectedness, and that is the part that helps you to engage foresight.
ANN: Can you give me an example of a difference between being present and not self-aware and present and self-aware? I kind of thought they both were the same thing.
ELIAS: No. They’re not. I would say… People have been moving in directions – you would term it to be “working on” or “moving into” and “practicing” being present – for quite some time now. And in that, being present is partially being now, being aware of now, not projecting but being aware of now and being aware of you IN that now.
ANN: That’s being present? Or self-aware?
ELIAS: That’s being present.
ANN: Okay.
ELIAS: Being aware of you in this now.
ANN: You in the now. Okay.
ELIAS: Being self-aware is knowing more and more and more of you: knowing all of your shadows, knowing all of your abilities – or most, because you’re always developing more; being aware of you as a person – your personality, who you are, what you automatically do, what you automatically recede from, what are your natural expressions, what is your natural flow.
And I’m not speaking about definitions; I’m speaking about BEING those things and being aware of those things in the now – being aware of your entire self.
Therefore, you’re also aware that everything you’re doing is a choice.
These are concepts, for the most part, now. It’s a matter of putting that so much into practice that you KNOW everything you do is a choice, and what are the implications of those choices? “I’m choosing to have a sandwich now, rather than two hours from now. What is the implication of that? How does that change my day? How does it change what I’m doing?” As you said, you have many days that you’re planning your day continuously through the day.
Now, if you take that a step farther, and you’re not simply planning your day several times throughout the day but you’re actually being present while you’re doing that, you’re aware of you and everything about you – who you are, what you’re doing in that present moment, and that you’re planning the rest of your day – what are the implications of that? Why are you doing it in the manner that you’re doing it? And when something interrupts that – because that’s the reason that you plan your day several times a day, because something is interrupting it and you’re having to change your plan for the day – in that, whenever something interrupts that, being self-aware enough that you are actually aware, “Oh! That’s a boulder on the stream. Where am I going now that the boulder fell into my stream? And I am the stream, and now where am I going? How am I flowing around this?” [1]
“This person has telephoned me and said, ‘I want to meet for lunch,’ and I agreed and I said yes in the moment. That just changed my day. My entire day just changed, because that fell into it spontaneously. Very well. I chose to do it. How am I flowing around that? Or am I flowing around that?” Being aware of all of the choices, therefore not losing a part of your day and then at the end of the day expressing to yourself, “I wanted to do this and I didn’t get this done because I went to lunch.”
ANN: You know, that… Very rarely do I express regret of not getting to get things done, and I —
ELIAS: It’s not necessarily regret.
ANN: Okay. Well, let me… Again, I think I have expressed this before. I feel – I don’t know if this is self-aware or not self-aware (laughs), but I, whether it’s at night or when I’m lying in bed or thinking about it in the morning, I’ll think, “Okay, maybe I want to get this or this done.” Sometimes I write down things I want to get done just because then I figure I don’t have to think about them if they’re written down, even though I never hardly ever look at the list again. (Elias chuckles) It just feels better to write it down. But I have this belief that whatever it is I have the impulse to do, I do that, and if it changes… Sometimes hardly anything gets done on the list, sometimes everything gets done, but I just think I’m more effective when I go with my flow.
ELIAS: I agree.
ANN: So that’s how I usually do my day.
ELIAS: And that IS being —
ANN: Self-aware. Or no? (Laughs)
ELIAS: It’s being more present.
ANN: Oh, I see. Okay.
ELIAS: It’s definitely being more present, and sometimes it IS being more self-aware and being present, both, and it’s a matter of putting those two together more. I would say that —
ANN: Okay. Okay. Yeah. I can do that.
ELIAS: — the present part is, at this point in your life, easier for you.
ANN: Yeah.
ELIAS: The being present is something that you’ve practiced enough, and that piece about flowing, you’ve paid enough attention to that that that’s become very comfortable for you and somewhat automatic; therefore, that’s not difficult for you. I would say that the part about self-aware while you’re being present is the piece to practice.
ANN: So, how the heck do I practice that? I would have said I thought I was pretty self-aware, but maybe I wasn’t! (Elias chuckles) So to practice… Or our example, someone asked me out to lunch, and what I would normally do is I would go.
ELIAS: It isn’t that you do something different.
ANN: All right.
ELIAS: You don’t want to do something different because you are being present and you are allowing your flow. It’s not that you’re doing something different, it’s that you’re adding something into that.
ANN: Okay. “What am I adding?” Okay.
ELIAS: What you’re adding into that is being aware of you IN that flow.
ANN: Me being aware… (Pauses while writing) Okay. Interesting. Hm! Lots of new, lots of old, lots of new-old concepts.
ELIAS: Yes.
ANN: Lots of new-old or old-new, however you want to look at it.
ELIAS: Yes.
ANN: But it’s just really a matter of practicing – and habits. I feel like habits can be our greatest foe, our greatest friend, just depending on how we —
ELIAS: I agree.
ANN: How self-aware we are!
ELIAS: I agree. (Chuckles)
ANN: Okay. What did I want to ask you? All right, this is I’m not that self-aware, maybe you will... Or no, no! Maybe I am more self-aware than I thought. We’ll see.
So you know, a long time ago we talked about my intent – you know, exploration of worthiness. And then, I didn’t realize all of a sudden everyone’s talking about, “What’s your desire, your essence desire?” I went, “What the hell is your essence desire?” But anyhow, Bonnie and I were talking at dinner, and I was thinking… Because she’s like, “It’s just something that’s always throughout your life.” So I think my essence desire HAS to be, I don’t know exactly but HAS to be along the lines of me helping people feel better. That seems to be a common theme of what I seem to… Like when I was in the family, someone’s hurting – my sister, when her son’s hurting says, “Go talk to Aunt Ann.” Or I go to lunch sometimes and I’ll hear people, with co-workers once, and they go, “We just feel so good being around you.” And sometimes I get a little mixed up because I do want people to feel better. I don’t think it’s me not paying attention —
ELIAS: What about when you were a child?
ANN: Okay, so when I was a child (laughs)… I was such a recluse when I was a child. I remember everyone wanting to play. The neighborhood kids would come and ask Debbie, my sister, and I to play. I never went, so they stopped asking and I thought, “Oh, I’d better start going.” But I played school sometimes, I just would get the books out and have my pretend pupils. What else did I do when I was a child? I think there was a knowingness when I was a child… or these things that stick out. Like I remember when my sister… I had walked everywhere and I was never afraid, and my sister told me about the boogeyman, and then I became afraid. I did have awareness that that suggestion was planted, is why I was afraid. [Gives another example] I don’t know, Elias. That’s harder. Am I even on the right track with wanting people to feel good?
ELIAS: Think about your intent.
ANN: Worthiness, exploration of worthiness.
ELIAS: Because your desire – and I would not necessarily encourage you to use the terminology “essence desire.”
ANN: Okay.
ELIAS: That creates a different idea.
ANN: Okay.
ELIAS: It’s simply your desire.
ANN: Okay, my desire.
ELIAS: It’s your engine that drives you.
ANN: It’s my engine that drives me. My engine that drives me.
ELIAS: And in that, it moves very closely with your intent.
ANN: With the worthiness. I want to show people their worthiness? I want people to feel their worthiness?
ELIAS: It’s not about other people; it’s about you. It’s about you.
ANN: Apparently I’m not very self-aware at this moment.
ELIAS: (Chuckles) (Lecturing) And stop doing that.
ANN: All right. I am becoming more and more self-aware as I go. I’m working on becoming more self-aware.
ELIAS: Excellent.
ANN: All right, what drives me? (Pause) I like to be in beautiful surroundings. I don’t know. I like to organize, I like things to always have their… What drives me is… What drives me? (Pause) Oh my god, Elias. I’m like at the biggest stumping… I have no idea. What I want to… Oh, what drives me? I mean, I’ve always been interested in… when I say “this stuff,” I’m talking about what we’re talking about now. No?
ELIAS: Now, think about throughout your life. Think about times – this is the easiest manner to decipher this – think about times in your life that may have been uncomfortable, that you perhaps, in a manner of speaking, found your way through something but it was difficult. And then when you look back, there is the automatic idea, “I could have done that easier if I knew more at the time, but that’s how I did it.” When you can say that to yourself, when you can look at something, anything in your life that you moved through and it wasn’t necessarily in a comfortable manner but you got to a particular ending, you accomplished something, you got to a particular outcome, that’s generally a more obvious display of your desire at work.
Think about your first marriage. That wasn’t always comfortable.
ANN: No. I mean, I actually was thinking about when I was going through a divorce, and the only reason I thought it maybe would have been easier is because I realized I had beliefs during my marriage that I didn’t later. And I gave myself —
ELIAS: I understand. I understand.
ANN: Yeah. How did I get through it?
ELIAS: It’s not necessarily about that you could have done it better. That’s not the point. Many times people THINK that at the end of something, but that’s not the point. The point is, you moved through something and got to an ending. You got to a position that you wanted to be in.
ANN: (Laughs) You know what I’m going to say? (Laughs) I followed my desire. (Laughs) I mean, I really wanted to… I don’t know what that desire was, except to be free, but I knew that I was going to…
ELIAS: But what did that freedom mean to you? Define that. What did you want to be free of?
ANN: Well, he was very suppressing. I wanted to be free of that marriage. I wanted to be free of him always telling me to look him in the eye, and I wanted to be free of him holding the stage for so long and he wouldn’t let me speak, and he wanted to keep repeating himself so he wouldn’t submit the floor to me. I wanted to be free of —
ELIAS: What does all that mean? That your desire is to not be controlled.
ANN: Correct. (Laughs) REALLY? Wow! I thought that was everybody’s desire.
ELIAS: No.
ANN: Really! Wow! (To John) I think that’s your desire. I mean, you probably have another one, but.. (To Elias) He doesn’t like it either.
Wow! I mean, that makes so much sense, but that’s seems like a no-brainer.
ELIAS: People don’t want to be controlled, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that that’s their engine that’s driving them through their life.
ANN: Oh, interesting.
ELIAS: When you think about when you were a child, and the other children wanting you to come and play and you wanting to be —
ANN: Doing what I want to do.
ELIAS: — in your own direction and by yourself and not playing with them, –
ANN: Yeah.
ELIAS: -- in that, once again, not wanting to be controlled.
ANN: Well, I mean I can’t argue with you (laughs), because that’s… I don’t want to be controlled, but I never would have come with that because I thought that was a normal thing for everybody.
ELIAS: Of course you did, because that is so much a part of you, because it’s your engine. And in that, it’s very similar to people expressing about their guidelines, that they think everybody does that, or their personality: “Everybody’s like that.” No, they’re not.
ANN: Oh my god, no wonder I fricking hated the covid mask thing so much, or the vaccine. I’m like, “You guys are trying to tell us what to do,” and I really had… I had problems with it. Oh! Interesting. All right. Well, I’ll take that.
ELIAS: Very well. (Chuckles)
ANN: (Sighs) Oh my goodness. So that was interesting. All right. (Elias chuckles)
Let’s see. I think I probably have all the questions or answers I need. I just have to start practicing.
ELIAS: Very well.
ANN: On staying present and being more aware of myself.
ELIAS: Very well. I would say you don’t have to practice being present much. As I expressed, I acknowledged you in that. You do that very well.
ANN: All right. So more self-aware.
ELIAS: You don’t have to practice with your flow very much, because you do that very automatically and very well.
ANN: So practice being self-aware and practice not following feelings.
ELIAS: Yes.
ANN: That’s a big one.
ELIAS: Yes.
ANN: So could you tell me one thing about myself that I’m not aware of, that I’m ready to hear now?
ELIAS: I already did.
ANN: I know you did, and I forgot already.
ELIAS: You know I did? Then why did you ask?
ANN: Oh, you mean in this conversation!
ELIAS: Yes.
ANN: Oh! Oh. (Both laugh)
ELIAS: I’ve told you two things that you were ready to hear that you weren’t necessarily aware of: that you are not as self-aware but you ARE very present and moving with your flow, and that I’ve identified your desire for you. There’s two —
ANN: That’s two things. Yes.
ELIAS: (Laughs) – two expressions that you weren’t necessarily defining to yourself, but that you were ready to hear.
ANN: All right. I hate to ask this again, but (reading) the more I am self-aware (inaudible) and genuinely… All right, so what is something I can do to – I know you told me this, but please remind me – what is something I can do to be more self-aware, just remind myself or to help me become more self-aware?
[The timer for the end of the session rings]
ELIAS: Notice that you’re being present and then expand that into including everything about you: your personality, being aware of your choices. Remember what I expressed to you about that, that you are aware that everything you’re doing, every moment, is a choice. And what do those choices mean to you? How are they impacting you?
ANN: Okay. Okay! Thank you.
ELIAS: That will help you to be more self-aware.
ANN: I liked this session, Elias.
ELIAS: Excellent.
ANN: Thank you. Ah! Practice, practice, practice.
ELIAS: Very well, we shall break.
ANN: Yes, we shall break and then it’s Lonn’s turn.
ELIAS: Very well.
ANN: All right. We’ll break. Thanks, Elias.
ELIAS: You are very welcome.
(Elias departs after 52 minutes)
[1] For more on the boulder in the stream concept, see Session 201605271.
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