Interconnectedness Is Flow
Topics:
“Why Is It Important to Make Someone Else Wrong?”
“Creating Imagery after Disengagement”
“Black Holes as Delineation”
“Interconnectedness Is Flow”
“Manifestations of Not Enough”
“Putting Yourself First Benefits Other People”
Friday, February 5, 2021 (Private/Phone)
Participants: Mary (Michael), Judy (Mallya), Sandra (Yukyi), and Susan (Sileen)
ELIAS: Good morning!
SANDRA: Good morning, Elias! This is Sandra, and I’m here with two friends, Judy and Susan.
ELIAS: Welcome!
SANDRA: Thank you.
ELIAS: And what shall we discuss?
SANDRA: Well, it’s been a number of years, our timeframe, since we’ve spoken with you, so I wanted to say first of all that I think at least Judy and I—I haven’t talked too much with Susan in this interim time—but I think Judy and I have become more self-aware over time, and we have shared a lot of the discussions in regard to the material that we’ve been going through. And I personally have had some very gratifying experiences, and the fact that I can experience something is gratifying, because (chuckles) I was so much in my head for so long, I thought I would never have an experience the way others seem to have. But I have had moments when there have been seconds when I’ve been aware, very intensely in a knowing type of way, of how physical existence is totally concerned with beliefs and constructs.
ELIAS: Congratulations!
SANDRA: And I’ve had seconds when the window seemed to open when I was very aware of the judgment aspect of life, which is somehow connected to choice. And I’ve had some interesting experiences, especially in the judgment area, because I have caught myself at times thinking, “What an ignoramus!” when somebody says something or I see them do something or whatever, and then I’ve noticed right away, “Oh, well, I’m judging, and isn’t that funny because I might actually be connected to that person in some way that I don’t have a clue about,” and then I have to laugh about it. So, I think that I’m catching the judgments a lot more often than I used to.
ELIAS: I would say that that is a tremendous step.
SANDRA: Yeah, I think that I’m forgiving myself. Oh, and the other thing that I’ve noticed also is duplicity. Wow, is that there, connected to everything. It’s like—
ELIAS: And remember: You aren’t eliminating these belief systems.
SANDRA: I understand that. I think I’m coming to the point where I allow it to be. And I’m more allowing of other people, but I’m still not very accepting, necessarily, of other people. I think those are two different steps.
ELIAS: I agree. But I would also say that the more you move in that direction of allowance, the easier it will become to move in the direction of acceptance.
And understand: In relation to that piece of acceptance, it is a matter of you becoming more self-aware, looking at yourself and what is important to you and why. Because the more you can actually evaluate each thing that is important to you and ask yourself WHY it is important to you, many of those pieces that are important to you begin to fall away; they begin to have less importance than they did previously. And, in that also, it is a matter of simply asking yourself at different points—especially when you are interacting with another individual and perhaps you disagree with them—asking yourself to yourself, “Why is it so important that you be right?”
SANDRA: Yeah.
ELIAS: Now; in that, that doesn’t mean that you are expressing that you AREN’T right. And this is an important piece, is that when you ask yourself why is it so important that you be right, it isn’t a matter of you changing your opinion and not necessarily being right, that it is entirely acceptable for you to be right for you. But why is it important that you be right and make someone else wrong?
SANDRA: I agree. I have experienced some of that, and I have been in the position where that has occurred, actually. I think I would put it that as far as allowing is concerned, I think that I’m accepting and allowing of myself to be this duplicitous person, because that’s just the way it is. So—
ELIAS: And that is exceptional. I would say congratulations.
SANDRA: Oh, wow, thank you. (Elias laughs) It certainly makes it easier, and I can laugh at myself a whole lot more.
ELIAS: I would agree. And I would say that in that, that is the most significant piece, being able to accept you as you are and as you express, and to incorporate the perception of yourself that that is acceptable. (Sandra laughs) You don’t have to be anything else but what you are.
SANDRA: Right. I (laughs)… I have a humorous story about that, because I even notice sometimes when I’m talking with another person that I want to say something and I know I’m going to blast out this great judgment (Elias laughs), and it hits me and I just see myself: “Okay, here comes the judgment!” And then I speak the judgment quite blithely, and then I say, “Oh! I spoke the judgment.” (Elias laughs) And then I have to sort of laugh at myself when I’m done, because you know, it sort of feels good. (Laughs)
ELIAS: I would say that is excellent, my friend. That is such an accomplishment, and I would encourage you to be proud of yourself.
SANDRA: Well, I will try to be. That’s a problem for me, is to be self-accepting. That’s a real problem. Self-love and self-accepting, but I’m working on that.
ELIAS: I would say that is acknowledging yourself more. You deserve it.
SANDRA: Okay. Thank you. Anyway, I have experienced… I’m going to go on to something else a little bit. I have experienced some deaths in the family in the last eighteen months. My brother-in-law passed; that did not affect me terribly much, because I didn’t know him that well, but my husband passed away a little over a year ago, and he and I had a very tumultuous relationship and I was very unhappy for a good bit of our relationship, and it was very strange.
First of all, I have to say I’m grateful for the Elias material, because that material got me through that death experience, along with my meditation practice. I don’t think I would have been able to handle it nearly as well if I hadn’t had this information. So, I’m grateful for that.
ELIAS: You are very welcome.
SANDRA: And it was interesting that about maybe almost nine months after his passing I was driving down the road, and I had this insight where it suddenly occurred to me how grateful I was to him for having this tumultuous relationship, all the unhappiness that he had been in and I had been in, because it just seemed to fit. It just seemed to be… my life needed to take that trajectory, and I am where I am now because of it. And I am a much better person now, I think, a much more sympathetic person and just a better individual. I have more insight than I would have had if I hadn’t had those experiences with him. And I just felt just gratitude, and I guess my question is, is he in a place where he can understand this gratitude that I feel?
ELIAS: Yes.
SANDRA: Cool.
ELIAS: Yes.
SANDRA: That’s good.
ELIAS: Because, let me express to you, when an individual disengages, when they die and then they blink into nonphysical, as I have expressed previously they retain their objective awareness and their perception for a time.
SANDRA: Right.
ELIAS: And in that, they are creating all of their physical imagery themselves.
SANDRA: Yes.
ELIAS: They aren’t participating with anyone else in that creation. BUT—that doesn’t mean that they aren’t interacting with other people’s energy and that other people’s energies aren’t coming through to them—that IS. And therefore, whatever you are expressing, that energy goes through to him and he will configure that in a manner that is consistent with his imagery. Therefore, in what he is creating in imagery, he may be sitting at the kitchen table having a conversation with you, and you may be saying that to him.
SANDRA: Oh! Okay. I had heard about this energy—
ELIAS: Energy IS being translated to him.
SANDRA: All right. I had heard it in the reverse. I had heard in sessions where people were asking, and you mentioned that the energy could be felt by the person still in physical existence, but I didn’t recall—
ELIAS: Oh yes, that is also very correct, that you can be experiencing their energy also if you are paying attention, and that they can be projecting energy to you. They aren’t projecting it intentionally to you in physical focus, because they don’t realize they are dead yet. They are projecting that energy to you in the image that they are making of you, but that translates into your reality by being projected to you in your reality. They simply don’t realize that they are doing that. They aren’t doing it intentionally.
SANDRA: Right. So, I guess my next question is, is he still creating the imagery at this point?
ELIAS: Yes.
SANDRA: Okay. So, he has not yet determined that he passed?
ELIAS: Correct. He is not aware of that. He hasn’t remembered his death yet.
SANDRA: Okay. And…
ELIAS: Remember that time moves differently for them than it does for you.
SANDRA: Yes. I understand. I had a feeling a month or six weeks after he passed that there might have been some connecting possibility between he and I, in that all of a sudden I was smelling floral scents when I should not have been. And I’m wondering if that actually occurred or if that was just a figment of my imagination.
ELIAS: No, it was not a figment of your imagination. Yes, it was very real.
SANDRA: Okay. I thought it might be, but I just wanted to ask.
Well, the other death that I wanted to talk about a little bit was my dear companion, my cute little J.J., Shih Tzu dog, poodle mix—
ELIAS: And sometimes those disengagements can be more difficult and incorporate more grieving than the ones involving humans.
SANDRA: Yes. It certainly was that… Well, it was that way with me in a different way. It was more emotional up front, but my dealing with Orville’s death was longer standing and more stressful. But the interesting thing about when J.J. passed, I was really quite devastated because he and I had a real connection. I think I could talk to him and he understood what I said—one of those types of feelings from a human. Anyway, it was interesting that two weeks after he passed, almost to the day, up until that time I had felt like he was still around and if I would just turn around at the right time I would see him in the places where he normally would be. And two weeks to the day, almost, it was like he’d just gone. And I had this thought like he was sending me a message and saying, “You know, lady, it’s time to get on with life. I’m gone.” (Elias laughs) And I thought that was just an interesting experience. I just wanted to relate that.
ELIAS: That is interesting from the standpoint that you were paying attention and you felt it, because what I would say is that was the point in which that energy then reconfigured.
SANDRA: Very likely. I wonder what he reconfigured as. (Laughs) I always kept feeling like we’ll meet again, we’ll meet again, and I just have to wait. And I kept looking and—
ELIAS: And you likely will!
SANDRA: So, I’m hoping maybe we’ll meet again, he’ll be a dog again, because I would like a dog. But anyway, whatever he’s doing now, I hope he’s doing fine.
ELIAS: I would say quite so, and I would say in that, it is very likely that you will engage again.
SANDRA: Whoa! It sounds cool. I’m getting a little elderly to have another dog, but I have a daughter who would take over, I’m sure, if I decided to disengage. So, I can do that.
ELIAS: Excellent.
SANDRA: All right. I’m going to set aside something and go to some totally different thing. This is something that has been bothering me since we spoke a couple of years ago. I had a question about black holes at that time and just want to check and make sure I understood correctly the message that was given in that regard. One thing I asked was were there black holes in the body, and if I recall correctly the answer was yes, they were just very tiny, miniscule, almost unmeasurable-type things?
ELIAS: Correct.
SANDRA: And the other question had to do with what is the purpose of a black hole. And if I understood that correctly, it had something to do with allowing for delineation in physical existence.
ELIAS: Correct.
SANDRA: So, I’m wondering: That would sort of indicate to me that black holes have something to do with perception—or no? I mean… Or is it just a physical—
ELIAS: Definitely. Because everything in physical reality has to do with perception.
SANDRA: Well, yeah.
ELIAS: Because perception creates all of it. Anything that is physically manifest is created by perception. This is what I was expressing a time framework ago in relation to your sciences, that this is the piece that they are missing that they haven’t quite connected with yet. And this is the most important piece, because is the piece that everything else hinges on.
SANDRA: Right. I’ve read that, so… Yeah. I think I understand that. I just wanted to make sure about the black holes and the delineation.
ELIAS: Yes.
SANDRA: That actually the reason [that] on a painting you actually see a red to a green or whatever, there’s this line in between, which is… You don’t see the line, but you can actually differentiate the one color from the other, or the line in the drawing, because of the black holes.
ELIAS: Yes.
SANDRA: All right. I got that correct, then. Okay.
I’m going to go on to energy flow, which has been an interesting experience that I’ve been going through. Since my husband passed and I have to sell the house and move, and there are just a tremendous amount of decisions that have to be made by myself in this regard. And last fall I was in a wonderful place, and I was doing nothing, basically, except sitting in my chair and being in the moment and reading mystery stories and just trusting. And it was like my house got sold, I got my garage cleaned out, I made a few phone calls, I got some things sold, and then it was like the energy flow just sort of flipped. It was like oh, this is working too well, something must be wrong. And I somehow slipped into more distrusting and less in the moment. My meditation practice sort of went by the by because thoughts kept coming in and I couldn’t stay in the nice, quiet, peaceful place where I go when I meditate. And it was…
Since then, there’s been a lot of back and forth. I’ve had times when things seemed to like flow for a couple of days, and then it would just… Anyway, the question is, I’m not sure how I go in and out of this, and I’m not sure what to do, except that maybe just keep meditating and try to stay in the moment. But it was no effort when it occurred, and I feel like there has to be no effort that happens. (Laughs) I’m not sure how to get to no effort, I guess, is what I’m asking. (Laughs)
ELIAS: I understand. I understand. And what I would say to you is that is an excellent experience that you gave yourself, and what it is showing you is this is what (sighs) life can be.
SANDRA: Well, it was wonderful. (Laughs)
ELIAS: But in that, what that is about is, what you showed yourself was that it is possible, and therefore you were giving yourself the experience of reality, that that is reality, that that is real. But that doesn’t mean you do nothing. It is a matter of you gave yourself that experience to show yourself that realness and to move you in the direction of the next step, which is being more self-aware and then being intentional, living life intentionally, which is a significant part of this Shift.
In that, it is a matter of becoming aware objectively of how one moment flows into the next. I speak about interconnectedness, and so many people think that this is about being connected to a tree or being connected to a body of water or a rock—no. Interconnectedness begins – or the awareness of it—begins with you being aware of how one moment flows into the next moment, one subject connects and flows into the next subject, one choice flows and connects into the next choice. Therefore, empowering you in every moment about choice, that everything is about choices and all of it is yours, that all of the choices are yours.
Let me give you a hypothetical, simple example that you can use in this next step of becoming aware of that interconnected flow, how everything is interconnected, and then you can intentionally move in that direction and regain that flow that you had intentionally. The hypothetical example would be, let us say you receive a notice from the post office that you have a piece of mail that they are holding at the post office that is registered mail, and that you are being instructed and requested to come to the post office to sign for this piece of registered mail—and now it begins. And you don’t think about it; you simply have that notice, that becomes a signal to you to prompt you to go to the post office. You don’t think about going to the post office, you don’t think about the action involved, you don’t think about the choice; you simply do it. You go to the post office, you sign for the mail, they hand you an envelope, you open the mail, and in that mail there is a check. And therefore, you see this check and you decide—although you aren’t thinking about it as a choice—but the next action is you decide to go to the bank and deposit this check.
You still aren’t thinking about it; you simply are doing the actions. One action flows into the next action. Once choice flows into the next choice, but you aren’t aware of any of that, you aren’t doing it intentionally; you are doing it by rote, automatically. It is the logical course of action to do.
Now you go to the bank, and you deposit the check in the bank and you come out of the bank and you go to your vehicle. And you notice that the bank is situated next door to a shop that you have wanted to visit for some time now. And in that moment, you pause and you realize you are sitting in your vehicle in the parking lot of the bank because you went to the post office and you received a check, and that led you to the bank, and the bank then placed you in the parking lot which is directly next door to the shop that you have wanted to visit for a time framework and have simply not had time or keep forgetting to do it, or you haven’t had the inclination. And now you are sitting in your vehicle looking at the shop next door, and you have no place pressing that you must be, and you have time, and you are actually clearly aware that one subject and one action and one choice flowed into the next and was connected with the next and then the next and then the next, and now you are in a position where you can intentionally make a choice to step out of your vehicle and go visit that shop or to return home. But you are aware of it being a choice and that this choice is interconnected with all those other choices, that you didn’t realize when you received that notice to go to the post office that you were leading yourself to this point.
SANDRA: Okay.
ELIAS: In that, this is interconnectedness. And when you are aware of the flow of each subject, each action, each choice flows into the next and everything is interconnected, then you begin to make intentional choices, and you are correct: everything flows, and everything is easy and effortless.
SANDRA: Yeah. I can see that. Another word I would choose is you are observing your choices, I guess.
ELIAS: Yes! Most definitely. You are aware of them.
SANDRA: Yeah. Become more observing of what’s going on.
ELIAS: Yes.
SANDRA: Okay. Well, it’s something to work on. (Elias laughs) I will need to work on that because I have lots of decisions to make. So far I haven’t created a house to move to, and I have to be out of mine by a certain time and I’m trying to pack things up, and I don’t know where I’m going so I have to create some place to go here pretty soon.
ELIAS: And what I would say is don’t panic and don’t push, but observe.
SANDRA: Yeah. Okay.
ELIAS: Watch what you are creating and how one thing flows into the next, and know that everything is interconnected. Even when it doesn’t seem to be objectively, it is.
SANDRA: Yeah. Okay. It’s really difficult not to get anxious.
ELIAS: I understand.
SANDRA: Just to be self-trusting enough.
ELIAS: I understand. I understand. And one of the reasons that it is difficult is because you are so accustomed to following feelings.
SANDRA: Yeah. Yeah. That’s for sure. Is there any problem in the creation of where I would move because I don’t really know where I want to go?
ELIAS: No.
SANDRA: I have one daughter in one place and one daughter in another, and I don’t care, I could move to either place. I would rather stay where I am, but I have to go because it’s too much to take care of and I don’t want to deal with it anymore. And my daughters are like miles away, 600 miles away, and they want me closer. So, it’s going to be a tough move.
ELIAS: What I would say to you, my friend, is ultimately think about and pay attention to what you want and what is comfortable for you.
SANDRA: Yeah. Well, comfortable for me might be staying in the area where I am, but…
ELIAS: Then do that.
SANDRA: I don’t know.
JUDY: Did you hear him?
ELIAS: What I would say is—
SANDRA: I know you’re telling me to stay here, but my daughters really want me closer, and I—
ELIAS: I understand. I understand.
SANDRA: I’m almost 80 years old. (Laughs)
ELIAS: But ultimately it is your choice about what is comfortable for you. And in that, I understand that they may want you to be closer to them. I would say that that is their choice—this is your choice.
SANDRA: Right. I understand that, too. And my choice may change, I don’t know. I just am so up in the air and I feel like I only have so much time to make this decision (laughs), so there you go. But I will try to be more observing and see what happens. That will probably help a lot, to observe choices.
ELIAS: Very well.
SANDRA: All right. I will take all the energy you can send my way in this regard.
ELIAS: Very well. And I will definitely project it.
SANDRA: (Laughs) I appreciate it very much.
And I have a couple of maybe shorter questions. I’m just curious: My daughter Cathy has an autoimmune disease. They’re checking that out for her. She’s had some physical problems. I sort of feel like no, it’s not, but I was just wanting to check. That’s my feeling about it.
ELIAS: At this point you are correct.
SANDRA: Oh. Well, I hope she doesn’t create it in the future.
ELIAS: I would say that is her choice, but at this point you are correct.
SANDRA: Good. And then I have just sort of an interesting thing. I and my daughter Cathy and my granddaughter Erica, we all have anxiety issues and have had them. And it’s sort of interesting that in this family, Erica is my other daughter’s daughter. So, I have two daughters, Cathy and Larissa; Cathy has anxiety difficulties, I have anxiety difficulties, and Erica, who is Larissa’s daughter, has anxiety difficulties. Is that sort of something that occurs in families? I mean, we are all different essence names, but I’m sure—
ELIAS: Yes, it does. Yes, it does. And it doesn’t matter if you are in physical proximity of each other or if you are interactive with each other, that yes, it is an expression that can and does occur in families. And let me say to you that even if one of the individuals had no interaction with the others whatsoever, that wouldn’t change the situation.
SANDRA: Hm. Very interesting. I guess we’re dealing with it in different ways, all three of us, but it is there, it’s obvious.
ELIAS: I would agree, and what I would say to you is you can actually be helpful to them by addressing to it with yourself and in that, practicing not following feelings.
SANDRA: Right.
ELIAS: I know that can be difficult. Let me express to you, [inaudible] you engage the exercise of asking yourself every day who you want to be today, and you answer that with one word, one action word: “I want to be funny today; I want to be listening today; I want to be supportive today; I want to be kind today; I want to be silly today.” And you change it each day, and throughout the day you continue to express that in every situation.
Now, the point of this exercise is actually the opposite of what I usually express to people, because the point of this exercise is not to be paying attention to you. The point of this exercise is how can you express that action of that word with everything else in your day—with every person, with every being, with every thing. It doesn’t have to be another human.
SANDRA: (Chuckles) That could be challenging. I’m not sure how you could be silly all day, but I guess you could try. (Group laughter)
ELIAS: In that, it could be a chair, it could be anything, but how can you express that word and be that in every situation in your day? Now, what that does is that encourages you to stop paying attention to feelings.
SANDRA: Okay.
ELIAS: Because this is not a feeling word; this is an action word. Don’t choose a word such as “happy;” that is a feeling.
SANDRA: Right.
ELIAS: Don’t choose a word such as “abundant.” Don’t choose words that have to do with feelings. Therefore, don’t choose a word such as “I want to be safe today.” Safe is a feeling.
SANDRA: Oh! Okay. Actually—
ELIAS: In that also, a word such as “safe” encourages you to do what? Pay attention to you. Not what is outside of you, not about something or someone else. This is about how you project yourself. Therefore, what you are paying attention to is how you are affecting anything outside of you. And that helps you to pay more attention to what you are doing and what type of energy you are projecting than to what you are feeling. And when you are engaging a feeling, regardless of what it is—a good feeling, a bad feeling, it doesn’t matter—rather than justifying it and explaining it, you simply acknowledge that feeling and then do something different.
SANDRA: Okay. I’ll work on that. I was using meditation to try to curb anxiety.
ELIAS: I would say that if you do a different action, it will be much more effective.
SANDRA: Okay. All right. Interesting. Very good. Thank you.
ELIAS: You are very welcome.
SANDRA: I was just wondering if my essence name has stayed the same over the years and whether I have the spelling correct on it?
ELIAS: And your spelling?
SANDRA: It is Y-U-K-Y-I.
ELIAS: Yes! You are correct.
SANDRA: Okay. So that is correct.
ELIAS: It hasn’t changed.
SANDRA: All right. Because there was someone else in the forum years ago who had a similar name. It was Y-U-K-I, I think, and I just wanted to make sure that that with the extra Y was the correct spelling.
ELIAS: Yes.
SANDRA: Okay. Thank you. And then the only other question, and then I’m going to leave the rest of the time to others here: I was sort of interested because I developed all kinds of health issues when I was a caretaker for my husband. My knees sort of gave out. He was very heavy and I had to help him off the floor any number of times and push him in a wheelchair, and things got very difficult physically. He was six foot three, and I’m quite a bit overweight. But since he passed, I sort of expected my health issues would improve, and they did not. So, I’m creating this for some other reason.
ELIAS: I would say no, you aren’t. You are still creating it in connection with him, and in that, twofold reasons. One was in relation to being uncomfortable and partially resentment.
SANDRA: True.
ELIAS: And the other in relation to guilt.
SANDRA: True.
ELIAS: Therefore, in that, I would say that since he disengaged, I would say that you haven’t quite addressed to that, and therefore you continue to create those symptoms. In this, I would say that your realization of your gratitude will be very helpful. But you can be grateful and still feel guilty.
SANDRA: Yeah. I think I’ve been aware of that.
ELIAS: I would say, be grateful and let go of the rest, because it is pointless—and besides, it isn’t true. There is no reason for you to feel guilty. I understand the element of resentment, but that is being replaced, to a degree—to a degree—by the gratitude. Now let it be fully replaced by the gratitude.
SANDRA: I think I understand that conceptually, but I don’t think I’ve actually… There’s another layer or two to it that needs to be gone through.
ELIAS: And you will. You will understand it, and I would say that you likely will understand relatively quickly.
SANDRA: Oh, good. That would be helpful. (Elias laughs) Good to hear. (Laughs)
I hope that Orville and—that was his name as this focus—have had connections in other situations where it was not quite as tumultuous as this particular lifespan that we spent together.
ELIAS: Yes, you have—many .
SANDRA: Yeah. Many, I’m sure. I could ask how many, but I guess it doesn’t really matter. (Chuckles)
ELIAS: I would say you have shared together (pause) 622 focuses together.
SANDRA: Holy cow! (Laughs)
ELIAS: And I would say that some of them have been tumultuous, some of them have been adversarial, but most of them have been intimate and amiable.
SANDRA: Well, that’s good to know. I’m glad to hear that. That may help me get rid of some of the guilt and resentment to know that. It might be helpful. He was sort of a non-communicative person. I found him rather difficult in this lifetime to get to know and to understand what was going on.
ELIAS: And I would say… Let me also express to you—and this may be somewhat helpful to you also—that people manifest in groups and their relationships with each other vary in different focuses, in different lifetimes. But in that, many times people are drawn to each other because they have had so many lifetimes together and that familiarity draws them to each other. But that doesn’t necessarily mean that in every focus they will have a compatible and complementary relationship. You may be a soulmate with someone and not have every focus with them be compatible and complementary, but because people are drawn automatically to each other because of that familiarity, many people do actually interpret that as, in a manner of speaking, that they should be in a relationship with this person. And that influences them to not only BE in a relationship with them but to REMAIN in a relationship with them.
And in that, I would say that that becomes reinforced with societal perceptions and family perceptions and your own perceptions. And in that, I would say that it is a matter of recognizing that you may have been engaged in an ongoing, longstanding relationship with this individual, and it may have been tumultuous and you may have developed resentments, and that would have been natural. And in that, it likely was because you weren’t complementing each other in this focus, and it likely would have been more beneficial had you not continued in a longstanding relationship. But that is still a choice, and it doesn’t mean that it wasn’t purposeful.
SANDRA: Right. I understand that. I have even verbalized that to other people.
ELIAS: Excellent.
SANDRA: So, I understand that.
Thank you so much, Elias. I’m going to sit back here and allow Susan to ask a question. There are maybe nine minutes left of our time with Mary that we have with you via her. So, I’ll let Susan ask her question.
(To Susan) Which one do you want to ask, Susan? Go ahead?
SUSAN: Okay. Thank you, Sandra.
SANDRA: (To Susan) Speak loud, because your voice doesn’t pick up a lot of times. You need to be close to the recorder, is what you need.
SUSAN: Okay. Elias, I created for myself a scam that became very involved, and I lost a lot of money. And I’d like to understand better why I created that for myself.
ELIAS: And what is your assessment at this point?
SUSAN: Hm. Well, my assessment is that perhaps this individual needed that money more than I did (laughs), and that at first I felt violated, in a sense, but then I realized that even though he stole this money that I could have done other things with, that he really didn’t steal what I valued the most—you know, my appreciation of beauty, my interaction with other people, just my zest for life. I mean, I do give those things away sometimes; I do. But nobody could really steal that from me unless I decided to give it away.
ELIAS: I understand, and I agree. And what I would say to you is that this is a significant part of why you created that—part. Therefore, in that part, it is a matter of recognizing what cannot be taken away from you, what is genuinely yours, and that ownership is somewhat of an illusion in relation to anything. Anything physical that you claim ownership of is actually somewhat of an illusion; it simply is an expression that, in a manner of speaking, makes you feel more important and gives you an element of status. But what is genuinely you cannot be taken away from you. You can give it away, but it cannot be taken away from you.
Now, in that, as I expressed, that is part of the situation, what created that. But another part of that is your perception before that happened. Let me express to you, you create what you pay attention to, and you always create more of what you pay attention to. Therefore, that is the natural order of consciousness. Therefore, in that, if you are paying attention to not enough, then you create more of not enough. But sometimes you create more of not enough in manners that may be somewhat extreme, such as this, to emphasize that to yourself and to encourage yourself to change that, to change what you are paying attention to and to move you in a more beneficial and more empowering direction. Which I would say, that would be the second part of what you were doing in this, to give yourself that opportunity to be moving in a direction of changing that perception and changing what you pay attention to and what you concentrate on.
Are you paying more attention to everything being enough now?
SUSAN: (Pause) What do you mean by “everything”?
ELIAS: I mean everything, that whatever you are paying attention to that you aren’t looking at it from the perspective of not being enough—not enough time, not enough energy, not enough health, not enough money, not enough interactions, not enough love, not enough attention. Not enough, not enough, not enough. It could be anything.
SUSAN: So, is this kind of a lack of appreciation for what I have?
ELIAS: To a degree.
SUSAN: Okay. Is this longstanding… You know, this seems to be an issue that I have a really hard time letting—
[The timer for the end of the session rings]
The time is up?
SANDRA: Well, it will be, but go ahead with your question, and he’s still here.
ELIAS: Continue.
SUSAN: Okay. You know, I had a marriage for a lot of years, for 22 years, and I often looked at it as not enough—not enough interaction with my partner. And since then I have looked at a lot of things that I didn’t feel grateful for. I mean, some of it has become more obvious, and I still hold onto guilt somewhat from this. And the relationship I have now (sighs)…You know, it is better at the moment, but we seem to run into… like I would feel not respected. So, is all that related?
ELIAS: Yes. Yes.
Now, you have given yourself an extreme experience to emphasize this subject of not enough, and to encourage you to change what you are paying attention to. In that, this is all a matter of perception. You can be in the same situation and perceive it in different manners, and that is what you will create.
SUSAN: Okay. Is this… like, I feel I do not do well enough in many, many situations. Or is this looking to other people for this sufficiency?
ELIAS: Both. Both.
SUSAN: Okay.
ELIAS: Because if YOU aren’t enough, then you have to look to other people.
SUSAN: And then they don’t come up with it, so then I’m dissatisfied.
ELIAS: Precisely. Of course they don’t, because the concentration is already being projected in not enough. Therefore, they will always fall short.
SUSAN: Okay. Is my value of being frugal part of this as well?
ELIAS: Yes.
SUSAN: Okay. Because it’s always been something I valued with inside myself. That I, you know, wouldn’t waste stuff. I would be a—
ELIAS: I understand. And let me say to you, my friend, that there are many expressions that may not be to your greatest benefit that you might actually think are good. There are people that have incorporated significant trauma early in their lives that might influence them to constantly push themself to excel, and they may be very successful, and they may look at that as being good. And it isn’t necessarily that it is bad, but that the motivation for that came from something that was never enough.
SUSAN: Okay. So, is this kind of greed, or is this more just loving myself better?
ELIAS: (Gently) I would say loving yourself more.
SUSAN: Okay.
ELIAS: Recognizing that you are deserving, and not settling for less than because you aren’t deserving.
SUSAN: (Sighs) So, then it’s okay to want things and—
ELIAS: (Firmly) Most definitely. Of course it is acceptable to want, because you are always moving in a direction of expansion. Even when you are moving in a direction of not enough, you are always creating more of not enough. In that, is it acceptable for you to want? Of COURSE it is, my friend.
SUSAN: But there are ways that I pursue it that hurt other people then.
ELIAS: How?
SUSAN: (Pause) Well, I don’t know. Just not… not having enough compassion, I think, for other people sometimes.
ELIAS: Once again, not enough—which is an expectation of you.
SUSAN: An expectation of me?
ELIAS: Yes!
SUSAN: That I don’t come up with enough for the situation?
ELIAS: Yes. Yes.
SUSAN: Okay.
ELIAS: That you aren’t enough, that you don’t do enough, that you aren’t deserving enough, that… And in that, if you are moving in a direction of what you want, or what is interesting to you or something FOR you, that is selfish, it is inconsiderate, it isn’t considering other people, and therefore it is potentially harmful to them.
No, no, no, no! You are your best self, and you are the best benefit to everyone else around you when you put yourself in that primary, first position—when you think about you first, when you act on you first.
SUSAN: So there is no such thing as selfishness?
ELIAS: I would say that selfishness, in relation to what you recognize in your reality, would be perhaps the expression of an individual that is very self-absorbed—which is very different. Therefore, in reality, the expression of selfishness? No. Because selfish is considering you, considering self, and that is good.
SUSAN: Okay. So, I do not have to feel guilty about any decisions I made for myself in the past?
ELIAS: Correct. And let me also express to you, any choices in the past that you engaged that now you might not necessarily agree with or you might not necessarily believe were good choices, that you have the opinion that this or that might have not been a good choice for you, in that, you made the choices that you could at the time with the awareness that you had. You cannot judge past choices by now, because your awareness is different now than it was then.
SUSAN: That’s true.
ELIAS: And therefore, your evaluation of any past experience and choice is colored by your perception now, which then is inaccurate in relation to whatever choices you engaged past.
SUSAN: I see that somewhat. I see that somewhat, yeah, that I didn’t even realize the range of options I had to choose from back then.
ELIAS: Correct.
Now; let me say to you, when you genuinely are putting yourself in that primary position, when you genuinely are thinking about you first and what are your choices first, how that benefits other people is that when you are doing that, you don’t put any expectation on them—because you aren’t involving them, actually. When you aren’t putting yourself first and you think you are helping other people but you aren’t in that first position, you aren’t actually being as helpful as you think you are, because what you do then is you put other people in positions of either being dependent on you or that they aren’t making the best choices that they could make, that you are generating better choices for them by being helpful to them. You see how you discount other people when you aren’t in that primary position?
Now, you don’t mean to do that. That isn’t intentional, and that is the example of choices that you make and expressions that you generate with the awareness that you have at the time. You cannot judge that in relation to any past experiences. What you can do is you can be aware NOW, and you can express, “Now I know. Now I can do.” And in that, reminding yourself to put yourself in that primary position, which is very different. In any situation that you may not be comfortable with, pause for a moment and express that question to yourself: “If I put myself in the primary position, if I put myself first, how would it change the choice I’m making in this moment?”
SUSAN: Yeah.
ELIAS: “What would I do different?” And stop thinking about what the other person will do.
SUSAN: (Laughs) Okay. Okay. I mean, in relation to this money, I even realize that I don’t even care that much about it. But I would appear to be a better person if I had given it away to, say, my children or a good cause or something like that. (Laughs)
ELIAS: It isn’t about being a better person. You are being a better person by having that experience and giving yourself more information about you.
SUSAN: Okay. That’s a good idea. Yeah. Yeah, thank you so much, Elias.
SANDRA: Well, I think our time—
ELIAS: You are exceptionally welcome.
SANDRA: Yes. And I thank you once again also for your help for me. And Judy has been listening in, and I think she’s enjoyed the conversation.
JUDY: Yes, I have. Yes, I have. So, thanks, Elias. I think I feel you around me all the time. Are you here?
ELIAS: Most definitely.
JUDY: Good.
ELIAS: Always.
JUDY: Ah, well good. I’m glad to hear that. I thought maybe you pulled a fast one on me again when— (Elias laughs) You’re laughing. Yeah, I think you did, didn’t you? Yeah.
ELIAS: And I would say to you, my friend, I am very encouraging of you with your angels. Continue with your quest.
JUDY: You remember. Good, good, good. Yes. All right. (Elias laughs) I want to start writing about it. Do you think I can? I don’t have—
ELIAS: I definitely would express that you can, and I would be very encouraging of you.
JUDY: Oh, thank you. See, I’m just like Susan. I don’t feel like I’m a good writer. See, I don’t feel good enough.
ELIAS: Ah!
JUDY: I’ve got to get over that, you know. There are—
ELIAS: In that, I would express [gently giving an order here],”All three of you stop doing that.” (Group laughter)
JUDY: Yes. Slap our hands. (Elias laughs)
SANDRA: There are two very strong belief systems, I think, in all of us. One is not enough, and the other is cause and effect. Cause and effect.
ELIAS: Yes, I agree. And I would express to all three of you to stop it. (Group laughter)
SANDRA: Okay. So, I was right. You—
ELIAS: You are worth more and deserving much more.
JUDY: We are. We are, ladies. We are worth more than… Right. (Laughs)
Okay. Thank you, Elias. So, was it those two ladies that gave me a compliment, was that you?
ELIAS: Yes.
JUDY: Yes. Was it more than just you? Was Tompkin or Paul in there or something?
ELIAS: Patel, yes.
JUDY: Patel. Yeah. I had a feeling. Boy, I’m getting pretty good at this, aren’t I? Anyway (Elias laughs), thanks for showing up like that. That’s pretty cool, and I had to laugh about it later. I thought, “Oh! That was him.” I didn’t catch on right away. (Elias laughs) Anyway, thanks a lot. And who knows? Maybe I’ll get back and have another session with you now that we’ve broken in again. I’ve had time to digest all of the information I gathered from you several years ago, so… Anyway.
ELIAS: Very well. I welcome your company.
JUDY: And we welcome YOUR company. Thanks for being around.
ELIAS: You are very welcome, my dear friends. I shall be gleefully anticipating our next meeting.
JUDY: Good.
ELIAS: And remember: I will be projecting my energy to each of you constantly in support and encouragement.
JUDY: There you go.
GROUP: Thank you.
JUDY: Yeah. I certainly feel you around me. Even with my little wands that I use. (Elias laughs) Are you there, too, when I use those? (Laughs) He’s laughing. Yeah. Anyway, I’ll have to tell the women about that when we hang up here. Okay.
ELIAS: Very well.
JUDY: Thank you.
ELIAS: I express tremendous, tremendous love to each of you, and dear friendship. Au revoir.
GROUP: Au revoir. Bye-bye.
(Elias departs after 1 hour 19 minutes)
©2021 Mary Ennis. All Rights Reserved.
Copyright 2021 Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved.