The Shrine of Devaluing Oneself
Topics:
Session 20070404 (2236)
“The Shrine of Devaluing Oneself”
“Expressing Energy in Difficulty"
"You Know More Than You Think You Know"
Wednesday, April 4, 2007 (Private/Phone)
Participants: Mary (Michael) and Liana (Ponsett)
ELIAS: Good morning!
LIANA: Hi there! Good morning, Elias. Nice to talk to you.
ELIAS: And you also.
LIANA: And thanks for everything. I wanted to ask a couple of questions. First, my intent. I’m really, really trying to understand what it is, and is it to be self-directed?
ELIAS: That would be an avenue of it. Remember: your intent is the general theme that has been expressed throughout the entirety of your focus, from the time framework in which you began within this focus to the time framework in which you end, and is the general theme that, in a manner of speaking, connects all of your directions, whatever you choose in your directions, how you proceed, what your experiences are. They are all connected to a general theme.
LIANA: I’ve had a lot of trouble picking a theme that covers everything. (Elias chuckles) I mean, somehow it seems connected to helping people reframe their lives, and it seems to somehow ease trauma, seems like part of it. But it doesn’t explain to me why I’ve had such isolation in my life, so I thought maybe being self-directed was part of it.
ELIAS: As I have expressed, that would be one of the avenues of it, but I would express to you that you are closer to that general theme in identifying your interaction with other individuals, not necessarily in instructing but in being helpful in their movements to be discovering themselves, and in that, you also discovering yourself.
LIANA: Okay. All right. Well, I can’t yet see that it's every part, but it does seem to fit at a core level.
My essence animal: is this a mountain lion?
ELIAS: Yes.
LIANA: Yay! (Elias laughs) And then my focus animal is a fox?
ELIAS: Yes.
LIANA: Ah, yay! I got two of them right.
ELIAS: (Laughs) Congratulations.
LIANA: Thank you. And then I was wondering: I’ve noticed sometimes you've explained to people their life, like if they’ve had a very long difficulty their whole life, sort of explain what this theme was for. And in mine, I’ve felt a lot of isolation in my life, just horrible isolation, and I’m wondering if you could tell me why that theme exists, why I chose that theme.
ELIAS: And what do you view at this point?
LIANA: Well, you had said to one or two people that I read in the transcripts that it was to help them to just be self-directed, and I thought, well that seems a harsh way to go about it but if that was the point of it, then that’s the point of it. And maybe that’s it, to be self-reliant.
ELIAS: Let me express to you, my friend, individuals generally think in a particular manner, and the manner of thinking is that experiences should be easy and what you want. And in that general association, that creates a manner of thinking in relation to experiences that are uncomfortable. And what occurs is that you view experiences that are uncomfortable and you automatically express, “There should be a better manner or an easier manner to accomplish what I want, rather than generating difficulty or discomfort.”
LIANA: Right.
ELIAS: But in actuality, although there may be an easier manner for an individual to accomplish a particular direction, it is the individual themself that determines that, in association with what they themselves will notice and what they themself will pay attention to. And although the individual may generate the ability to speculate in relation to easier methods, those speculations may not have actually allowed the individual to accomplish what they were accomplishing. For your desire is different from what you want.
LIANA: Well, I think since it’s my last lifetime, I remembered about how you talked about your last lifetime and how you went into a prison to balance things out, and I was just wondering if maybe I—I don’t know, if you want to say I took too many shortcuts in other lifetimes, but this lifetime it seems I cannot take very many shortcuts. So, I’m just wondering if that’s correct, if that assessment's correct.
ELIAS: Partially. The element of not many shortcuts is correct. The aspect of other focuses perhaps engaging shortcuts is not applicable, for that is an association with karma, which supposes that what occurs in one focus there will be an element of cause and effect with another focus, and that is incorrect.
LIANA: Well then, can you tell me why there’s been so few shortcuts and why there’s been so much isolation?
ELIAS: I would express—
LIANA: What’s the point of it?
ELIAS: I would express that in this focus your exploration has been somewhat detailed. And in that, the reason that you have not engaged what you term to be shortcuts is to experience all of the elements of each of your directions, to offer yourself more detailed information in association with your experiences.
I would also express to you that the experiences of isolation have been purposeful in one respect, for it has allowed you to generate a greater compassion for other individuals in similar situations, or a greater capacity for compassion for other individuals in many types of situations that may be uncomfortable. This has allowed you a sensitivity which is a benefit to you.
I would also express that there is another factor, and that factor is associated with a shrine.
Now; let me explain. A shrine is created from an experience that is strongly affecting of you. It may not necessarily be what you would term as an enormous experience, but one that generates a lasting association.
Now; the difficulty with shrines is that once the initial experience occurs, the individual generally pushes away the experience and attempts to ignore it.
LIANA: Okay.
ELIAS: And what occurs with that is that in ignoring it and in pushing away, the individual begins to express an underlying energy continuously in association with that experience, and therefore they begin to create other experiences that can be associated with that shrine. And each experience—
LIANA: What was my experience?
ELIAS: An experience of devaluing yourself, of feeling that other individuals that were important to you did not value you enough.
LIANA: Okay.
ELIAS: That created the shrine. And in that, throughout your focus, which is not unusual, you have contributed jewels to that shrine. Each experience in which you generate that association with not being accomplished enough, not being good enough, not being adequate enough—each time you generate those experiences, you add another jewel to that shrine.
But what becomes confusing is that you are not generating an objective association with the shrine.
LIANA: All right.
ELIAS: You view each experience as isolated and not connected. You view the similarities of the experiences—
LIANA: I think I know what you mean. I’ve created sort of a vortex.
ELIAS: This is the reason that it is important to be aware of what you are doing and what type of energy you are expressing, for that allows you to choose differently. For when you notice that you are generating one of these experiences again, that you are experiencing isolation, rather than generating the familiar automatic responses and continuing in that direction and feeling helpless to alter it, you can engage different choices to change what is occurring. But you cannot engage different choices if you are not recognizing that you are creating repeated patterns.
LIANA: Now have I started addressing this?
ELIAS: Yes.
LIANA: Okay. I feel like I have.
ELIAS: Yes. And I would be acknowledging of you in that.
LIANA: I have not related that to the isolation; however, I can see where it would be related.
ELIAS: Yes. For if you are not enough, you also subsequently are unworthy of interaction of value with other individuals. Therefore, you shield.
LIANA: Right.
ELIAS: And in that, you do not allow yourself to receive, for that generates that association that you can give but you cannot receive, for you are not worthy of receiving. But you can redeem yourself in giving.
LIANA: Right. Okay, that makes sense to me. And I think I’ve been questioning that lately, because I’ve been paying more attention to not having the automatic response so much and just noticing that other people really aren’t perfect either (Elias laughs), you know, and they’re not all that perfect in all the things they do, and really I’m as perfect as they are.
ELIAS: Yes.
LIANA: So, I should really… I could do these things, too, and I’m as adequate as they are to do them.
ELIAS: Yes.
LIANA: I’m suddenly just starting to realize that.
ELIAS: And that is very significant, my friend, and very worthy of your acknowledgment. That is an enormous success, recognizing that element.
LIANA: Thank you very much. Is that one reason why I attracted this student to mentor? To experience that?
ELIAS: Yes.
LIANA: Okay.
ELIAS: And to be acknowledging of yourself. And this is the beginnings of genuinely appreciating yourself, and that can change your reality significantly.
LIANA: Yeah, I can imagine it would.
The other thing I wanted to ask about was my job situation, and I’m realizing that the people who are my supervisors are not necessarily that much better at doing what they’re doing than I could be doing it.
ELIAS: Correct.
LIANA: Whether I would want to do it or not isn’t the question.
ELIAS: Correct. But the acknowledgement of yourself, that you are equally as equipped and skilled to generate the actions as the other individuals is quite significant also, for you are beginning to—
LIANA: Thanks, Elias. You’re awesome. Thank you for that acknowledgement.
ELIAS: (Laughs) You are beginning to view yourself in equal footing with other individuals, rather than elevating other individuals and not crediting yourself. I am tremendously acknowledging of you in that.
LIANA: Yay! Okay. (Elias laughs) So then in my situation, then my next step is I’m wanting a situation where I have more creative power to be self-directing and to be more assisting of others. And I feel like the place I work is in need of that, and I feel I would be good at doing it, but I have so many layers of supervisors, that leads me to question whether that is a good place for me to stay, or move on to another situation. I can see both sides of both possibilities.
ELIAS: And what do you see?
LIANA: Well, I suppose it’s possible for me to move into a supervisor position; for example, the position that my boss, Jeannette, has. But I would have to work with the supervisor that I have, Nancy, who I think is… She sees her role as criticizing other people and being a little bit more of a manager than is really effective. And I foresee that would be an irritant for me. Would you agree?
ELIAS: Yes, but not that you cannot address to that, for you can. That would be dependent upon you and how you interact, and whether you allow the other individual to be affecting of you.
LIANA: Okay. Then the other possibility is to move into a completely different field, which would be it seems like a lot more work. However, my skills might be more appreciated, also, if I were to do that.
ELIAS: And which is your preference?
LIANA: Well, I obviously would rather have my skills be appreciated, but that brings up the theme of all those questions projecting into the future, of which I know you already know.
ELIAS: Yes.
LIANA: So I guess that the answer is to just stay in the moment and continue to just kind of casually keep my eyes open for new possibilities.
ELIAS: And also, my friend, be what you term to be proactive. Rather than waiting, remember: you are projecting energy every moment. Allow yourself to evaluate clearly and specifically what you want, which for the most part you have. And in that, rather than merely waiting, allow yourself to see yourself in the position that you want, and to feel that, to experience it.
LIANA: Well, I don’t know what it… see, that’s what the rub is, if I don’t know what position I’ll have. It’s easiest for me to visualize being in the position that my supervisor, Jeannette, has at this moment. That’s much easier for me to visualize than a position in a completely new field.
ELIAS: Very well. And that may be an adequate beginning. Allow yourself to actually BE as though you were in that position.
LIANA: Okay. Now, here the next question comes up for me. Won’t I be creating myself, then, to be in that position, even though another position where my skills would be more appreciated would be my preference?
ELIAS: Not necessarily, for what you are doing is allowing for those possibilities—not waiting, but actively engaging in actions, which projects an energy to draw that to you.
LIANA: Okay.
ELIAS: Therefore, it is not necessarily a matter that you are setting your sights upon one position and therefore excluding any other possibilities—no. What you are doing is you are incorporating that position as a focal point, to allow yourself to practice and to allow yourself to project energy differently, and that will allow you to draw to yourself the position that you want.
LIANA: Okay. Great. Is there anything else I need to know about doing this process at this time? This is because I really get what you’re saying, and…
ELIAS: Be confident.
LIANA: [inaudible] specifically what I want.
ELIAS: Be confident.
LIANA: Okay. All right, I’ll do that. And just my doing this? I don’t need to actually submit resumes or anything at this point?
ELIAS: I would express that that is not necessary.
LIANA: Okay. Okay, great!
And my next question is, this development [?] that I had over the past month or six weeks, was this just a transition to me, or am I absorbing new energy, or what was going on with that? Because I had a lot of unpleasant imagery, objective and subjective.
ELIAS: Such as?
LIANA: Well, I had nightmares for one thing, creepy movies—that was the subjective part. Then I was physically ill, and there were a lot of really difficult patients on the unit, and I felt like my boss was undermining me sometimes by leaving me with not enough staff and that sort of thing. And I just thought maybe it all means self-doubt. I mean, I didn’t know what it meant, but it was exhausting and depressing, and I almost got panic-stricken.
ELIAS: Yes. And there are two factors in this that are allowing you to move into this new phase, so to speak, this new doorway into accomplishing what you want. One is the presentment to yourself of how much energy is expressed in difficulty, how much energy it requires to generate what you do not want and how fatiguing that is. That will serve as a reminder in relation to your energy, that you know, “If I begin to allow myself to move in certain directions, I will be creating tremendous thickness and it will require tremendous energy, and I will be generating discomfort. And I do not like that.”
LIANA: So that would be a sign to me that I was doing something, even though my mind was thinking I was curious about it?
ELIAS: Yes.
LIANA: You know like going to that club? Another part of me was telling me this isn’t a direction you want to go to, and I became so exhausted after that.
ELIAS: Correct. Let me ex—
LIANA: That’s what I was experiencing, because I wasn’t aware that it was such a bad direction for me. And I felt curious about it, but my subjective was telling me don’t go there.
ELIAS: Let me express to you, my friend, you actually know much more than you think you know, and you actually incorporate much more information than you credit yourself for. For you KNOW many expressions, but you override them. You know when you are uncomfortable, but at times you can override that and attempt to ignore it. You are offering yourself information when you are uncomfortable.
LIANA: Okay. Like for example when I went to that club, even though in some ways it felt comfortable and relaxing and I didn’t feel afraid, I also felt there was a lot of what I would call negative energy there, and I felt it was a doorway somehow, that if I went through that doorway it would not be in my benefit and it would not be in line with my intent.
ELIAS: Correct. And you knew that.
LIANA: Okay.
ELIAS: You did offer yourself that information.
LIANA: That's amazing to me. Okay. Wow. All right, it’s interesting.
So I guess that my energy level, then, will be one of the great significators of whether I am in line with my intent—
ELIAS: Yes.
LIANA: --in certain directions. Okay. That’s really important.
Well, I’ve sort of got you off the track from the second aspect of this, because you said the first one was presenting how much energy is expressed in difficulty, and what would the second thing be?
ELIAS: It would also be other than a reminder to you of what occurs in relation to what you are doing. Therefore you can, in your terms, catch yourself when you are beginning to express a certain type of energy.
And in this, it has allowed you an intensity to more clearly identify what you do not like, what you do not want, what you do not prefer, which emphasizes what you do want.
LIANA: Okay.
ELIAS: Many times, individuals think they know or understand what they do want, but they are not necessarily clear in what they want. And many times, you can generate more clarity in offering yourself an experience of what you do not want.
LIANA: Okay. Well, this is great. This is really a helpful session. (Elias chuckles)
Now, the other thing was I started having all these fears about old age, because I feel like I’ve just aged so much all of sudden the past couple of years. I never thought I would have – I’m sure everyone’s laughing when they read this part of the transcript – I never thought old age would happen to me. I just thought like, “I’m never going to have these problems.” And so when I start to have these problems, like my eyesight or I’m tired or my bones are thinning or I lose my sex drive and all these different things, I’m thinking, “Oh my god! It’s happening to me. I can’t believe it.” And that was one of my panic-stricken things, that it was happening to me, that I was a victim of it.
And my body is really important to me, and I think part of it’s my Milumet alignment, is that I’m really into the beauty of the body, physiologically and stuff. And yet there’s these mass beliefs of old age and what happens, and I don’t know how to disconnect from those. They’re like really strong vibrations that keep entraining my vibration.
ELIAS: First of all, I will express to you, if you choose to continue within this physical reality, you cannot disconnect from these beliefs, for they are an element of the blueprint, of the design, of this reality. You have chosen to be manifest in a physical reality that incorporates linear time. And in that—
LIANA: Right. But some people are so healthy and active, and they don’t seem to be affected.
ELIAS: And the reason is that they are not fighting with themselves. They are not opposing their age.
LIANA: Oh, I see.
ELIAS: They are appreciating their age and their appearance in each age.
LIANA: Okay.
ELIAS: What becomes the snare in relation to age is that many, many, many individuals oppose the aging of themself. And in that, they concentrate upon what they dislike, rather than concentrating upon what they appreciate in each age.
LIANA: Well, I don’t feel like it’s that… I have to admit, going through this part of my life, I’m not noticing that many physical things to appreciate. I mean, I’m glad that I’m not worse off than I am and I’m not bad off, but I don’t feel an appreciation for the loss of physical agility, etc. I don’t know what to appreciate about that. Can you give me a hint?
ELIAS: I would express to you, move your attention to different aspects, for when you become fixated upon what you dislike, that becomes the most important. And whatever is important, you will concentrate upon.
LIANA: Well, what else is there? I mean, to me it’s like these are things I’ve really, really, really enjoyed, and so to lose them or have them lessened, it’s like very disappointing, and…
ELIAS: I would suggest that you generate some investigations, and in that, allow yourself to discover different methods in which you can express physical agility in a different manner. Rather than continuing to move in one direction, my friend, you, in like manner to your body, are continuously changing. If you are continuously changing, it is somewhat ludicrous to continue to attempt to move in one single direction when you are continuously changing.
LIANA: Well, I guess that doesn’t feel that consoling to me. I mean, because I’m focused the way I’m focused right now. I’ll do the investigation and stuff; I’m just feeling disappointed, but that’s okay.
Then you would say that things like hormone replacement and stuff like that is really being in opposition to my age and not been of benefit?
ELIAS: Not necessarily, no. I would not—
LIANA: I think it would help my body to stay more agile and more youthful, in a lot of respects, for a longer time, which that to me would feel consoling.
ELIAS: And I would be encouraging of you in that direction, for it is a matter of listening to yourself, paying attention to what you provide yourself in comfort and what choices you can engage that will allow you more of an ease. If this is a direction that offers you comfort and you generate the beliefs that this will be helpful, why would you NOT engage it?
LIANA: If I feel it’s not helpful, don’t engage it, okay.
ELIAS: Correct. Listen to yourself. You will, and you are, offering yourself answers continuously. It is merely a matter of paying attention and listening to what you are expressing to yourself.
LIANA: Okay. Then I wanted to just ask you a quick question about something I’ve been wondering about, which is what they call sexual fetishes. Because I’ve noticed that…like I enjoy sexual energy, and I would like to continue enjoying it. And it seems to be something that can occur independent of what a person does physically, because people think it connects them with all kinds of things that have nothing to do with actual sex. Do you understand what I’m saying?
ELIAS: Yes.
LIANA: Now, one of my questions is, do people just learn to associate this feeling of sexual pleasure with these somewhat random behaviors that have nothing to do with sex? Do they just learn to associate that?
ELIAS: That would be dependent upon the individual. Some individuals—
LIANA: Okay, well how do these things get to be sexual when they’re not really sexual?
ELIAS: It is a matter of perception, and how the individual channels their energy.
LIANA: So the key is the channeling of the energy?
ELIAS: Correct.
LIANA: Not the behavior. The behavior may not be intrinsically physically sexual.
ELIAS: For you.
LIANA: Well, all right. Let’s just say if you are having a person who doesn’t have trauma or anything, and they’re having their genitals touched, they’ll feel a sexual feeling of some kind, whereas if I’m eating food, or somebody hits me or some of these other fetishes, the first time that ever happened I don’t think I would have a sexual feeling from it; I think I would have to learn that. Is that correct? Or are some people just born with that inclination?
ELIAS: YOU would have to learn it. Another individual may express that naturally.
LIANA: That is very interesting. So, they’re just born with that inclination?
ELIAS: Yes.
LIANA: That is very interesting. Okay. So, if I wanted to learn how to be able to have a feeling of the experience of sexual pleasure without necessarily having a sexual experience…? That is something I want to learn.
ELIAS: It is a matter of generating associations, allowing yourself to generate the experience. You know what the experience is.
LIANA: Right.
ELIAS: Allowing yourself to generate the experience in association with a different action.
LIANA: Okay.
ELIAS: In that, you generate a different association. It is a matter of perception and association, and in this—
LIANA: What about things like tantra? Where people actually feel sexual feelings in their body but without really doing anything?
ELIAS: Precisely.
LIANA: But aren’t they stimulating their energy centers? Or is there no real energy going through them?
ELIAS: Yes. As I have expressed, it is a matter of how you are channeling your energy, how you are manipulating it.
LIANA: Okay. So is there a way for me to learn this? Besides just tantra? Because I think tantra is really linked into a lot of other stuff, philosophically. It’s not just pure energy manipulation.
ELIAS: I am understanding. In this, you can incorporate those methods, but be aware of paying attention to you, that it is not necessary for you to incorporate or agree with all of the philosophy; it is merely a matter of choosing what elements are beneficial to you.
LIANA: Okay. I’ve noticed that it’s hard for me to lately relax and accept and allow myself to really experience sexual pleasure. And I was wondering if this was because of my age and my hormones, or an association with needing trust, or associating the need with a long-term relationship and an intimate relationship?
ELIAS: I would express that it is all of these.
LIANA: Okay. And which one seems to be the biggest?
ELIAS: I would express that they are all almost equal, but the association of relationship would be slightly stronger.
LIANA: Okay, so if I were to, for example, start hormone replacement, that would help a lot, just to get me going?
ELIAS: Yes.
LIANA: Okay. And then, as far as association with intimacy and relationship, I have this feeling like I’ve got expectations connected in there. If I’m in a relationship and I’m wanting intimacy, but the relationship is not long-term, it seems I can’t really let myself go, because I immediately develop expectations and feel a fear of loss. These are all contained in a big ball, and I want to know, can you suggest something to help me unroll this ball?
ELIAS: That is associated with projecting—projecting futurely in anticipation of what may or may not occur. I would offer the suggestion that you simplify and allow yourself to genuinely be present in your experiences now.
If you are generating an interaction with another individual, do not concern yourself with what may or may not occur within your next week, but allow yourself to genuinely be present in the experience now and to play with that, in allowing yourself to genuinely pay attention to what you are doing in the interaction. What is the other individual doing in the interaction? How are you manipulating energy to create what you want in the moment? And allow yourself to appreciate and revel in the experience of the moment, rather than discounting the experience of the moment by not being present and projecting into assumed anticipations.
LIANA: Okay. And so with Steve, some of the things that he likes I have questions about. I’m not… I like making him happy, but I don’t feel comfortable with… there’s something weird about it. I don’t know if it’s just my projection and my judgment. Is that what it is?
ELIAS: I would listen to your own intuition and your own uncomfortableness.
LIANA: Okay. So that uncomfortableness leads me to feel actually…My intuition—not to invade his privacy—is that I don’t know if he really enjoys sex with women all that much. I really wonder sometimes if he would enjoy sex with men more, and that’s part of my thoughts and my feelings. Is this on track?
ELIAS: Yes.
LIANA: (Pause) This is not something that you can answer? Because it’s invasive?
ELIAS: I did. I—
LIANA: Oh, I didn’t hear you. I’m sorry.
ELIAS: I expressed yes, you are correct.
LIANA: And that would explain why he never felt in love with a woman? That would be correct as well?
ELIAS: Yes.
LIANA: Okay. Well, that’s a pretty hard road for him, I guess, because I don’t think he’ll ever be at peace with that. But interestingly, it was my intuition before I even met him, over the phone, so…
ELIAS: (Chuckles) Once again, another example of how you do know more than you think you know.
LIANA: Yeah, and I’d always felt with him sexually like a strange vibe, like it wasn’t the same feeling back and forth that I’ve had with other men, almost like two kids just experimenting. There wasn’t really a strong interaction sexually. So that explains all that. Okay.
I don’t really see him ever coming to terms with this. I think the most he’ll ever do is just accept that he’s not happy. Does that make sense?
ELIAS: Yes.
LIANA: Okay. Right.
Then I have to ask something for my friend, my son. He has been having headaches. He wants me to ask if it’s a mental or physical cause.
ELIAS: Not physical.
LIANA: Okay. And then if it’s mental, what is the cause and the solution?
ELIAS: It is being generated with excessive tension and pressure, and excessive expectations.
LIANA: Okay. Can you be more specific? Something that will help him to understand.
ELIAS: He will understand.
LIANA: And what would you say would be a solution that he can work on that he would understand?
ELIAS: To allow himself to be more playful, to perceive his interactions in more of a type of game rather than generating tremendous pressure to accomplish and to perform.
LIANA: Okay. I want to go back to one more thing, and then I will feel pretty complete. As far as my sexual relationship with Steve, is there something about me that created a partner like this? Because I’ve created, I think, two or three partners like this, so I’m wondering what it is about me that’s drawing these people to me.
ELIAS: That which we have discussed. This is an element of your shrine.
LIANA: The fact that I feel that I’m not worthy of a partner? Or a committed partner?
ELIAS: You are not allowing yourself to genuinely receive.
LIANA: Okay. So, I’m picking people who can’t possibly give to me.
ELIAS: For YOU are not receiving.
LIANA: Right. That makes sense. Okay. And then with Steve, what kind of a sex life can we have, considering the situation that I’ve come to understand in this session?
ELIAS: That would be dependent upon you, and perhaps when you ARE willing to receive, you may not necessarily generate as much interest in this individual.
LIANA: Right.
ELIAS: And you may draw a different individual to you that will incorporate a greater capacity to be a complement to you.
LIANA: Right. So with Steve, I kind of feel bad for him in a way. I kind of felt bad because I know he has to have inner conflicts about this stuff, and in a way, he is creating this experience through me. It’s a way of creating what he wants without really having to look at it closely, but it seems like he’s getting closer to acknowledging what he wants. Would you agree to that?
ELIAS: Somewhat.
LIANA: I don’t think he’ll ever really go there. He just would be too threatened by it.
ELIAS: But this is not your responsibility.
LIANA: I know. I just have a sense of compassion or something.
ELIAS: I am understanding.
LIANA: Okay. This is sort of a curiosity question, and I understand if you don’t answer it, but has he had experiences with men before?
ELIAS: No.
LIANA: Okay. Never even fantasized about that? Or he has fantasized about it?
ELIAS: I would not express that he has not incorporated fantasies.
LIANA: Okay. Because I know that he’s having those questions come up for him. Okay, so there’s no real thing for me to do in this area, I guess. Possibly that’s one reason why the women he’s been with have never felt they could stay sexual with him, because it’s just not there.
ELIAS: I am understanding.
LIANA: Okay. All right, is there any other topic I need to talk about, or not need to talk about that would be of benefit for me at this time?
ELIAS: I would express that you incorporate enough to assimilate presently, and enough to do. (Chuckles)
LIANA: And my eyes? As far as my eyes go, is there a way…? Can I just sort of…? I keep thinking about them all the time, and…
ELIAS: THAT would be the biggest contributant to blocking any new action with them, is that you continue to—
LIANA: Okay. So, I have to get myself to not think about them. You know, that’s the hardest thing, is to not think about something.
ELIAS: Each time you notice that you are thinking of them, distract yourself. Intentionally stop.
LIANA: Oh, okay. And then it’ll gradually get less and less?
ELIAS: Yes. For the more you practice in intentionally stopping, the easier that will become and the less you will be thinking.
LIANA: Okay. One of my thoughts was that if I had already thought about them, that is was too late. Do you know what I mean?
ELIAS: I am understanding, but that—
LIANA: "Oh no, I’ve thought about my eyes again."—so that’s not a problem, just acknowledge it and think about something else.
ELIAS: Correct.
LIANA: All righty. And that’ll help my eyes, actually, right?
ELIAS: If you are actually doing it, yes.
LIANA: Okay. All right, thanks a million.
ELIAS: You are very welcome, my friend. I shall be offering my energy to you in encouragement and supportiveness, as always. And I shall be anticipating our next meeting.
LIANA: So will I.
ELIAS: To you, in great lovingness and dear friendship, au revoir.
LIANA: Thanks. Bye!
(Elias departs after 1 hour 5 minutes)
Copyright 2007 Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved.