Friday, July 15, 2005 (Private)

Participants: Mary (Michael) and Antone (Aix)

(Elias’ arrival time is 17 seconds.)

ELIAS: Good afternoon!

ANTONE: Good afternoon, E!

ELIAS: (Laughs) And how shall we proceed?

ANTONE: Well, I have questions, and I’m sure you have some answers. So let’s just dive right in, shall we?

ELIAS: Very well.

ANTONE: Thank you very much. I’d like to talk first about my cats, Sidney and Nagano, particularly Sidney. She’s been having peeing issues and she’s losing her fur on her hind legs and other various assorted spots. I’d like to know what’s going on with that and so forth. If you could give me some info on that, that’d be great.

ELIAS: And what is your assessment?

ANTONE: My own assessment has been kind of inconclusive. I’m a little at a loss to explain to myself why this is happening with her and what I can do to move it in a different direction.

ELIAS: And what do you notice in your energy?

ANTONE: That I feel very much love toward the cat, but then when she pees I have anger outbursts and I feel guilt and then love her all over again. I just don’t want her to engage in that behavior, and I don’t know really how to convey that to have her stop it. As far as losing the fur, I’m just worried about it. One of my biggest fears is that the cats are going to die, of course, so maybe that plays into that a little bit. Maybe you could help me out with that.

ELIAS: But what is your assessment of YOUR energy?

ANTONE: Well, I guess I feel reactive to her behavior and to the fur falling out.

ELIAS: Eliminate the feeling. Concentrate upon your energy, not necessarily associated with the feline.

ANTONE: I’m coming up with a blank.

ELIAS: Let me express inquiries to you. Do you notice your energy being heightened and somewhat agitated?

ANTONE: Oh, yes. When the peeing is noticed by me, absolutely. It creates like an inflammatory reaction, I suppose.

ELIAS: Ah, but in other time frameworks between these episodes, so to speak, you are generating a constant energy of agitation.

ANTONE: You mean related to perhaps other matters besides the feline?

ELIAS: Yes, that is what I am expressing. Apprehensions, agitations that are associated with other directions, other activities, other individuals.

ANTONE: I understand completely, yes.

ELIAS: And in that, the agitation has become so familiar that you are not noticing it. You notice it in moments that it becomes obviously triggered to be escalated.

ANTONE: By the cat or by other things.

ELIAS: Correct. You are not noticing the constant expression of that type of energy in less extreme, but nonetheless, it is constant. In creating that constant stream of energy of agitation but not noticing it, you are not allowing yourself an avenue to address to that and release energy. Therefore, you continue to hold to your energy. The feline is reflecting your energy and is also actually cooperating with you in this irritating action in generating an action that shall gain your attention.

ANTONE: Somehow I knew you were going to say that! (Laughs)

ELIAS: That shall prompt you to evaluate what your energy is doing continuously that is creating this reflection. Expressing the irritation merely reinforces what you are expressing continuously, regardless. You are continuously expressing this agitation in your energy and not allowing for a release of energy intentionally.

Energy is always expressed. You can temporarily hold to energy, but eventually it shall generate an avenue to be expressed. Generally speaking, in these types of situations in which an individual is ignoring the energy that they are expressing, that ignore-ance creates a holding of energy and does not allow for a release. Therefore, what shall occur is some extreme shall be expressed. The individual may begin spontaneously weeping, in their perception for no apparent reason. Or the individual may express some type of aggression or anger, which is an allowance of a release of energy. It is expressed spontaneously. But there are other manners in which you can release energy that may be more in keeping with your preferences and not generating conflict or annoyance.

In this, the first element is to become aware of this constant agitation and what is triggering it. This is not a question of attempting to evaluate a start point. That is futile; there is no actual start point. It is a matter of being aware within each day, throughout your day, of all of the actions or interactions or circumstances and situations that trigger these small agitations, how often that occurs, and becoming familiar with these small triggers.

In becoming familiar with all of these actions that generate this agitation, allow yourself to evaluate what within you is motivating that agitation, disappearing what you think of as the cause. For your automatic association shall be an assessment: “Ah, this occurred and I responded. This outside element occurred and I expressed a twinge of agitation.”

Now; recognize that it shall be subtle, for you are not allowing yourself to express. Therefore, this is the reason that you are not noticing this constant expression of agitation.

In this, also notice how often in any capacity you are opposing of yourself, of a situation, of other individuals, even of objects — which another individual may not necessarily objectively understand, but I am aware that you do.

ANTONE: Absolutely. (Laughs)

ELIAS: In noticing your opposition, in any form or capacity — it matters not whether you assess that is a large opposition or a small opposition — allow yourself to evaluate what motivates that opposition and how you are being triggered. In that moment, temporarily disappear the object, the situation, the manifestation, the individual, the feline — whatever — and merely evaluate within yourself. There is no outside object any longer that is creating this in you. You are generating an association, and that is what is creating that energy. That energy being projected is creating a scenario that you dislike, and that generates conflict with you and merely reinforces that agitation.

Agitation may not necessarily be expressed in irritation.

ANTONE: What are some of the other ways it can be expressed?

ELIAS: It may be expressed in restlessness; it may be expressed in scatteredness; it may be expressed in confusion. It may be expressed in anticipation, in which you may be generating excitement but not allowing that energy to express, therefore containing it.

Agitation is not necessarily what you would associate as negative. It can be expressed in many, many forms. It is a state of excitedness in relation to what you are doing. It is precisely what it is defined to be: agitated, restricted energy. It is moving but contained, and therefore, it is not being allowed to be expressed. That also generates nervousness, which contributes to restlessness. The nervous energy is what the feline is responding to with the fur.

ANTONE: The nervous energy?

ELIAS: Yes. The agitated energy and your ignore-ance of it is creating the response with the feline to be expelling, for this is what you would be incorporating if you were allowing yourself to expel this energy and not hold and contain it.

It is not necessary for you to be presenting yourself in the persona of being in control. (Grins wryly)

ANTONE: No. (Laughs) I think you are aware that I do like to have a feeling of being in control of myself and my life and my path.

ELIAS: And your projection of yourself in your persona. You may discover much more of your own freedom and much more of your own appreciation and much more of your own playfulness and fun if you are relinquishing some of that control.

ANTONE: If the phrase “relinquishing” kind of implies relinquishing, too, but I get the feeling that it’s just relinquishing, period. It doesn’t need to be under anyone’s control.

ELIAS: Correct. Allow your freedom. Allow yourself to flow rather than holding yourself in control and continuing the agitation. There is an element of you, my friend, that is quite passionate and that genuinely wants to express that freedom. That is my suggestion — allow yourself to express your passion.

ANTONE: That will segue into the part of our conversation of my passion for music and how I would like to use that passion to sustain myself in the world. I think that there are limiting beliefs involved, in that a person working as a musician can’t make enough money to live. That’s kind of a pervasive belief in society and so forth, and I realize that if I choose to have a different belief then I can make it happen. But I go along on the road and things happen and then... I don’t want to waste my time stumbling over words, but I guess what I’m looking for from you is how do I better position myself to bring that into reality, to bring that dream into reality? (Pause)

ELIAS: What is attractive to you?

ANTONE: In as far as what?

ELIAS: It matters not.

ANTONE: Well, if you use the word “attractive,” attractive to me implies physical attraction. If we’re talking about making music to make money and to sustain myself in the world, the attractive part about that is that music is fun. It is the most fun thing that I do, and so it’s logical to me that I should be able to use that to have the comfortable existence that I desire.

ELIAS: Correct. Attraction is generated by appreciation. If you appreciate some manifestation or expression, it is attractive to you. Whether it is sense-associated attraction or whether it is physical attraction or whether it is some other type of attraction, what creates attraction is an element of appreciation. The key is the appreciation. If you appreciate what you do, genuinely, that creates an attraction in other individuals, for you all generate this quality of being attracted to appreciation.

In a manner of speaking, you are all similar to a moth and appreciation is the greatest flame, and therefore, you are quite drawn to its beauty. Remember, though, that the moth, in drawing itself to the beauty of the flame, does not combust. It merely basks in the light and the warmth, and it continues, which is its benefit.

If you generate not comparing — which is a significant expression — if you can move your attention into a genuine appreciation of your craft, of your expression of creativity without comparing, without comparing not merely to other individuals or to society but not comparing either to your ideal self...

ANTONE: By that, do you mean an ideal sense of what I could be but that I’m not at the present moment?

ELIAS: Yes. Your ideal self is already being expressed, but your imaginary ideal self is the one that you compare yourself to in which you discount yourself and express that you are not good enough yet — you shall attain, but you are not good enough yet or you could be better; even if you are good, you could be better. That is comparing to your ideal self. That discounts you and does not allow you to express the type of appreciation that I am expressing to you. That allows you to move into expectation of yourself, which generates less of an attractiveness. You become a tiny flame rather than a raging flame.

In this, if you are generating a genuine appreciation of yourself, of your ability, of your production, of your creativity and your craft and you are not comparing and you are not generating expectations, this shall allow you to genuinely share your appreciation with other individuals, and they shall naturally draw to it, and they shall reflect your appreciation in attraction.

This is the key to the successfulness of your expression, not doubting, not comparing, not compromising, not acquiescing, not controlling, not holding energy, not agitating. Allowing, free flowing, appreciating, sharing, cooperating, those are expressions that do not express an element of opposition and allow you the freedom to create what you want successfully — and also to stop influencing your feline to be expressing.

ANTONE: That was very neat how you tied all that together!

I feel like I’ve been extremely accomplishing since I made the decision to have this session. When the group session was first announced here, I found myself in a position where I was not working, had not worked for a long time, and unemployment was running out. Future, I was seeing it as bleak. I thought, “Oh no, poor little me cannot afford to have the session, and I will be sitting home feeling sorry for myself while everyone else is together.” Then I just decided nope, I will use the money that I have in the bank that is supposed to be saved for the rainy day to pay the rent and I will have the session and I will go and everything will work out all right.

My life just took off in accomplishment after that, and you are aware, I know. I was so appreciative and I was having such a good time, and then I kind of got bogged down a little bit. I feel like in the last couple of weeks I’ve kind of rebounded more into accomplishing. I want your comments about that, especially how it plays into fears about money and just trusting that the future will be okay in going forward. I’ve never experienced disaster yet and I believe that I never will, but there are times when you doubt, when you’re afraid. I want to know how to address those.

ELIAS: How to address in those moments is to acknowledge yourself and to allow yourself to evaluate realistically what is your fear and what is motivating it. An actual experience or an anticipated experience? If the fear is generated by an anticipated experience, it is not real. It is a speculation. You may reinforce yourself by acknowledging what you have accomplished, what you are doing and what your experience is, not what it is not, and not projecting yourself futurely in the anticipation of an unrealized experience.

Let me express to you, my friend, one of the greatest obstacles that you can generate in discounting yourself and reinforcing a lack of trust is to express one term: “what if?” In that one term, you severely discount yourself and your trust of yourself, and you are immediately projecting yourself futurely in anticipation. And what also are you doing?

ANTONE: Making myself unhappy?

ELIAS: Agitating.

ANTONE: We work back around to the agitation! I see. That’s very enlightening.

ELIAS: Anticipation creates agitation.

ANTONE: Yes! Oh, that makes perfect sense!

ELIAS: It is another expression that is subtle that is important that you pay attention and generate these associations of what creates agitation.

In this, if you are allowing yourself to trust and you are allowing yourself to express a playfulness with yourself — not worry, not anticipation — you present a very different type of energy. You project a very different type of energy, which generates much more ease and allows you to create what you want much more easily. It also allows you to create surprises.

ANTONE: I was just thinking that, as you well know, right?

ELIAS: Surprise may be quite fun.

ANTONE: Absolutely! (Laughs)

ELIAS: In this, you also reinforce yourself and reinforce your ability and reinforce your trust and your confidence. But in continuing the agitation, you eventually erode that confidence and begin to slip into doubt of yourself and recreate familiar patterns.

ANTONE: That’s what happened recently when I sort of fell off the accomplishment wagon.

ELIAS: (Laughs) Ah, but perhaps at this point now in this moment and this experience, you shall climb yourself on again, for you are allowing yourself to express and to incorporate a playfulness and fun. Remember that in your adventure this evening. Remember your appreciation and your fun, and allow a free flow of energy, not agitation.

ANTONE: Music is a good place to allow a free flow, isn’t it?

ELIAS: Yes. I would express to you that any art is an excellent avenue to express a free flow of energy, if you allow. It may also be an avenue of considerable restriction and frustration if the individual is comparing and discounting themselves. Therefore, it may be either.

ANTONE: Well, I am going to make it fun tonight! That’s my goal!

ELIAS: Very well!

ANTONE: I really have lost track of time and I’ve no idea how much time is left, but I want to ask certain things. What was up with my knee with the whole surgery business and those problems that I’ve had with that? Can you give me some enlightenment on that?

ELIAS: And your assessment?

ANTONE: It’s kind of hard to say. I mean, you would think that the knee would be about stability or walking through life or something like that. I feel like I have moved through that, but I did have a recent kind of recurrence of the pain situation which I thought the surgery had fixed, so to speak. But I feel like pretty much I’m passed it, but maybe you could give me some enlightenment on what was going on behind all that.

ELIAS: Not necessarily associated with walking or the symbology that you have expressed; more associated with your beliefs and offering yourself an example of generating a manifestation that you would present different scenarios to yourself with and how you associate with your own beliefs and whether you are opposing them or not, whether you are allowing yourself to move in conjunction with them and generate an easier movement, or whether you are opposing them and creating more conflict.

Generating physical manifestations many times provide an example to individuals in challenging them in association with their beliefs in regard to the physical manifestation. In this, in not opposing incorporating medical assistance and generating that action and recognizing that within your beliefs you do express a belief that certain procedures in certain situations can fix certain manifestations.

Now; this is a belief; it is not bad. No belief is bad. It is the association with the belief or which influences are chosen to be expressed that generates the association of good or bad, which are also associated with your preferences.

In recognizing that you incorporate the belief that certain procedures fix certain manifestations and not opposing that, you cooperated and allowed yourself to generate a favorable outcome, one that you prefer. You also incorporate the twinges, for there is somewhat of a twinge in your associations — which is not unusual with you; you incorporate a lot of “shoulds” — and although you acknowledge your choice and that it has created a favorable outcome, intellectually you express to yourself that you created that but not entirely, and it is intellectual. There is another element within you that expresses to yourself that if you were better with information, you should incorporate the ability to generate any physical action yourself without incorporating help.

What you are missing in this piece is that you created all of that. You created the physicians; you created the scenario; you created the procedure. You created all of that.

ANTONE: The unpleasantness and the aftermath, as well. I don’t understand why I would create such an unpleasant experience for myself. I mean, you’re right, I can see that intellectually, but I don’t understand the why of it, why I would put myself through that.

ELIAS: This is a question that most individuals express, which I may express to you appears to myself as quite ludicrous. (Antone laughs)

The question of why is one of a moot point. You do for you do, for it generates experience and value fulfillment, and value fulfillment is not always expressed in comfort. It also offers you information. All of your experiences offer you information, and timing is an element of the information in how you can assimilate it. You present this situation now in questioning of it and why did I create that...

ANTONE: I do that all the time! (Laughs)

ELIAS: Let me express to you, this is quite associated with this subject that is being presented now in this time framework, which is being addressed to many, many, many individuals throughout your reality, that of being present. You were quite present with yourself and aware of your existence in that time framework, were you not?

ANTONE: Yes, I was. It was an unpleasant existence, but I was quite aware of it.

ELIAS: Correct, and I may express to you, as I have with other individuals, this is significant. For I am expressing information to all of you in this time framework concerning being present with yourself, and most individuals do not understand what that is or how to be. But you each have experiences that you can draw upon that are your information of what it is to be present with yourself and genuinely aware of your existence.

Throughout most of your focus, in all of the mundane actions that you incorporate within your day, in most of your interactions with other individuals or creatures — any type of interaction — you are not aware of your own presence, of your own beingness. You become your own background. What you are doing becomes the subject or what you are interacting with. Your environment becomes the subject and you become the environment, and you are not present with yourself. You are not acutely aware of your actual existence. You are almost divorced from your own presence, for you have become the environment rather then you. You are moving, you are doing, but there is no awareness of who is doing the doing or who is generating the movement. The awareness is of the movement or the doing, not of the subject.

ANTONE: So how to become aware of the subject? How to bring your presence into the mundane and the spectacular?

ELIAS: Being aware of you, of your existence, that you exist in this interaction. That is important, for if you exist, you are presenting. There is some element that you are presenting. That is the point — you are projecting. It is difficult to be aware of what you are projecting in energy if you are not aware of your existence.

If you are connecting with your instrument, generating your creativity, if you are aware of your presence with it, you become part of it and flow through it. You become fluid. You become the music.

ANTONE: Is that what’s happening to me when I feel... Sometimes when I’m playing, I feel overwhelming emotion almost like I want to cry. Is that what’s happening then? Because I think it would be hard to play and cry all the time! But I feel that a lot.

ELIAS: Yes, that emotional communication is an initial expression. Also, there is another element in that, for in those moments in genuinely being present and expressing that free flow of energy, the reason that you experience somewhat of an overwhelm and it appears to you that you may actually weep, that is an automatic physical body consciousness release of energy, which is also associated with the agitation.

ANTONE: Releasing some of that.

ELIAS: Yes.

ANTONE: One thing I wanted to ask you about is I remember an incident when I was four years old where I heard the Lassie theme on television and it made me cry. I didn’t understand why I was crying, and my mother asked me why I was crying. I thought to myself, “The music made me cry.” And that was significant to me. I still want to cry every time I hear that little piece of music. I had intended to phrase it as “why does the Lassie theme make me cry?” (Laughs)

ELIAS: I may express to you that this is not actually unusual. There are many individuals that are moved in that manner in association with certain expressions — many, many individuals in association with music, different expressions of music.

In relation to that, generally speaking, the reason that an individual experiences that type of a response is associated with the tones and the combination of the tones and the familiarity of the combination of those tones. At times, it may be associated with another focus that is directly associated with that particular composition, at times. Or at times, it may be associated with a counterpart action that an individual may engage with the individual that composed that particular expression of music.

But more often, it is an association of familiarity of a combination of tones, which are a combination of vibrational qualities that are very familiar to you as essence and are what you would term to be deeply appreciated. Therefore, that generates this response that appears to you to be strange, but in actuality, it is a genuine appreciation of vibrational qualities of essence that shall be affecting of you within physical manifestation, that familiarity.

ANTONE: So if I’m letting the energy flow free, I should also let the tears flow free — and there goes a “should,” I know. (Laughs)

ELIAS: I would be strongly suggesting yes.

ANTONE: Don’t suppress the tears, let them flow.

Can you verify my colors?

ELIAS: Very well. Your impression?

ANTONE: My impression is blue. I want to say a light blue, baby blue, powder blue. Those are the things I’ve come up with. And for the yellow, I think lemon yellow.

ELIAS: Correct.

ANTONE: So the blue is actually fluctuating, then?

ELIAS: No. It is very light blue.

ANTONE: Light blue, but it’s called all of those different things in our society.

ELIAS: Yes.

ANTONE: Was I Aubrey Beardsley?

ELIAS: Observing.

ANTONE: So that’s why the breathing issue is so affecting, and I feel so for that.

I want to write down my friend Victoria’s essence name and your standard essence info. What color paper shall we be using for the paper? I have an assortment of four.

ELIAS: And what colors do you present?

ANTONE: I think they’re all lovely, but I think we’ll go with the yellow.

ELIAS: Ah, very well! (Pause) Essence name, Adriane, A-D-R-I-A-N-E. And your impression?

ANTONE: Well, I always like names that begin with A. I think many, many of my focuses have A names, isn’t that correct?

ELIAS: Correct. Your impression as to essence families?

ANTONE: Oh, perhaps Sumari essence family?

ELIAS: And?

ANTONE: That one is harder for me. I don’t concentrate on the particulars of the information a lot, so I don’t guess a lot on those things. You can just tell me.

ELIAS: Sumari is the alignment; the belonging to, Borledim.

ANTONE: My childhood experience with the floating fluorescent ball, what was that?

ELIAS: And what is your impression?

ANTONE: My impression probably at the time and for many, many years was that it was some sort of thing from outer space. But I have a suspicion now that it was something different! (Laughs) Would you confirm that?

ELIAS: Yes. An expression of energy that you configured into a ball.

ANTONE: I configured that?

ELIAS: Into the ball. And what energy would you speculate that was that you configured into the ball?

ANTONE: Well, it was very comforting. I remember kind of waking up, and it would move around the room to different places. When I woke up one last time, it was at rest, and then I didn’t see it again, ever. But it was comforting. So was it comforting energy?

ELIAS: Yes. Of?

ANTONE: I don’t know.

ELIAS: Myself.

ANTONE: I suspected it! Thank you very much. That was wonderful.

ELIAS: You are quite welcome.

ANTONE: I began to suspect that a while back that it was indeed you.

ELIAS: We shall incorporate one more question.

ANTONE: What would be your advice to me on how to proceed on my path as I want, per my preferences. I think you know what they are.

ELIAS: To relax, first of all — practice relaxing — and to be paying attention.

ANTONE: To?

ELIAS: All that we have discussed this day. That would be my suggestion.

ANTONE: Thank you very much.

ELIAS: You are very welcome, my dear friend.

ANTONE: It was great to see you again.

ELIAS: And you also. I express tremendous affection to you and my appreciation. Perhaps in accepting my appreciation, you shall become more familiar with your own appreciation.

ANTONE: Thank you. I feel it washing over me.

ELIAS: In tremendous friendship and fondness, au revoir.

ANTONE: Au revoir.

Elias departs after 1 hour.

©2009 Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved

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Copyright 2005 Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved.