Slipping Away’ in an Elias Session
“‘Slipping Away’ in an Elias Session”
“Freely Expressing Emotion”
“Examining the Threat of Differences”
Wednesday, December 17, 2003 (Private/Phone)
Participants: Mary (Michael) and Coen (Delaitre)
(Arrival time is 18 seconds.)
ELIAS: Good afternoon!
COEN: Good afternoon, Elias!
ELIAS: (Chuckles) We meet again!
COEN: Nice to meet you again!
ELIAS: And you also, my friend.
COEN: You think we’ll keep it quiet this time, all the guys around me and all the noise? (Elias laughs) Let’s get started. I have a few questions for you.
ELIAS: Very well.
COEN: I’d like to return to our previous session. Yesterday I received the tape and I listened to it. My feeling from our session was that you gave me some information about my eldest son, that he would like to have or need my attention. Listening back to the tape, I couldn’t find that piece anymore. I’m almost sure you gave me that information.
The second one I would like to ask about that session is during the second part of the session, I had the feeling that I slipped away, that you talked to me but I didn’t really hear it anymore. I got a more feeling experience. Can you comment on that?
ELIAS: (Laughs) Both of what you are describing are not uncommon. For as I interact with you and I engage conversation with you, I am not merely engaging conversation with you objectively. I am also interacting with you subjectively in an energy communication. Therefore, what you receive is more than what is merely expressed in words. Therefore, at times you may be allowing yourself to move your attention more subjectively, assimilating more of the energy that I am expressing to you, and that may generate a lack of memory temporarily in what is occurring objectively.
Also, it is not uncommon for you to understand and receive information that I am expressing to you subjectively that you translate objectively, but it may not necessarily appear within your recording. (Chuckles)
COEN: So, the release of tension of my muscles during that session is also an example of the different kind of energy exchange?
COEN: I understand. I had the same impression, but I asked you to be sure.
You also talked about types of energy you are expressing. The last two months, what I notice in myself is that I show my anger and my frustration much more and much more easily than I’ve done before. To be quite honest, I feel comfortable with it because now I have the feeling that I really expressed the kind of emotion that I feel inside. Is that what you mean by expressing different kinds of energy and noticing what kind of energy you are expressing?
ELIAS: Yes. In this, as you allow yourself to be expressing more freely, you begin to notice that these types of expressions of frustration or anger may dissipate and be expressed temporarily, for eventually, as you become more familiar with allowing yourself to express more freely, you begin to generate that in many different manners, and therefore allow a freer flow of your energy in all areas. In that expression, you dissipate much of these expressions of frustration or anger, for you are circumventing those types of expressions by allowing yourself more freedom in other types of expressions, and therefore not generating that type of holding to energy which generates frustration. Are you understanding?
COEN: I’m trying to understand. The question I have in my mind is one of the things I should not do is hold back the frustration.
COEN: If I feel an emotional frustration, then I have to give room to that frustration and to communicate it to myself or other persons or whatever.
COEN: If I get a free flow of energy in frustration or fun or anger — it doesn’t matter — communicate it, give it freedom, then in the long run it will be easier for me to handle and I will get other kinds of emotional communication.
COEN: My wife noticed a different me a week ago. She said, “You’ve changed.” Do you agree with her?
ELIAS: And what is your assessment?
COEN: My assessment would be that I give myself the opportunity to do whatever I really want, I give myself more freedom in it, and that I’ve — I would like to use the word “grow,” but that’s not really what I mean — but I’ve developed more completely.
ELIAS: Yes. In this, you allow yourself more of your own freedom, and that allows you to more easily widen your awareness, which also generates much more of a genuine expression of acceptance and understanding of yourself and of other individuals, and it alters your interactions with other individuals and they do notice.
COEN: The people closest to me notice first, in this case.
COEN: So what you’re telling me is continue with your emotional communications and continue in this line you’re working now?
COEN: Of course I do create my own reality, but one of my frustrations is the black-tie problem with the party we are organizing tomorrow. Was that frustration a result of the relation with my father, or is that a result of the way I see the whole society and the fake part of the society?
ELIAS: And what is your communication to yourself?
COEN: My communication is that I wanted to decide something. I didn’t like black-tie and I wanted to create a reality without black-tie, but it was forced upon me that I should accept black-tie.
ELIAS: Now; in this scenario, what do you notice of what YOU are doing?
COEN: I noticed that I wanted to make the decision to quit, but I didn’t.
ELIAS: And you allowed yourself to acquiesce to the choices and the dictates of other individuals. This generates frustration, for although you are paying attention and listening to your own communication, you are not implementing action in association with your communications.
COEN: One of the choices I had was to quit the organization.
ELIAS: Yes, or you may allow yourself to incorporate more flexibility and not view the situation in such black and white terms.
COEN: That is one of the things I did in the last two weeks. I tried.
ELIAS: Yes. There are many choices in regard to any scenario, not merely an either/or.
COEN: And one of those choices is to accept what happens and to be more flexible with it.
ELIAS: Also in that, have you inquired of yourself how you may accomplish expressing that flexibility and that acceptance?
COEN: I try to understand your question. I’m not sure I understand it.
ELIAS: Have you asked yourself how you would accomplish this action of acceptance in this particular scenario?
COEN: No, I didn’t.
ELIAS: Now; this is significant, for you have offered yourself an opportunity. You have presented to yourself a scenario within your physical reality in which you present your own expressed beliefs and you present to yourself different choices. You also present to yourself the opportunity to view your expressed beliefs, your preferences, but also to examine differences and allow yourself this opportunity to be accepting of differences.
Now; this is significant, for this does not require compromise. It is an exercise in genuinely allowing yourself to examine differences and what threat is generated within you in association to those differences. You rebel, so to speak, against the idea of the formality, and your symbolization for that formality is the black-tie.
Now; in this, you also recognize that other individuals do not express in similar manner to yourself, that other individuals appreciate that expression of formality.
Now; in this examination, what threatens you in other individuals’ appreciation of the formality?
ELIAS: Why do you respond in defensiveness and therefore generate frustration? The reason is that in viewing other individuals’ choices and preferences and their appreciation for an expression of formality that you do not agree with, that automatically generates your association with a discounting of yourself, that you view other individuals to be discounting of you and not listening to you and not valuing your opinion for it is different. But you are not valuing their opinion either, for it is different.
Now; as you are beginning to recognize, as you alter your perception and as you alter your expressions, other individuals’ expressions alter also. For as you express acceptance...
COEN: ...they will.
Now; this is an interesting scenario, for in actuality it is not a presentment of harmfulness to you and is in actuality somewhat of an easy exercise that you present to yourself to allow yourself to generate these types of examinations of your expressions and your beliefs and what triggers certain automatic responses.
You are not devalued or invalidated merely that you do not agree with certain expressions of formality, and you also may participate in such a scenario and not be acquiescing and not be compromising, but be cooperating without agreement. Do you understand?
COEN: I understand. I had another question that’s related to this, the communication of my younger brother. I see that I create the same exercise, that I have to accept the way he behaves, the way he thinks, compared to my view of how you should behave within working reality. Do you agree with me?
ELIAS: Yes. This is the recognition of differences, and that your choices, your opinions, your preferences are quite acceptable and you may express them, and you may incorporate your own guidelines, so to speak, in relation to your behavior for that is associated with your preferences. But it is also significant that you recognize differences and that other individuals generate different experiences and may express different beliefs. Neither are true or right; neither are wrong. They are different.
In this, you may dislike some differences, and that is your choice also. But whether you agree with or like the behaviors or the choices or the preferences of other individuals, that is not to say that they are wrong.
COEN: That’s also my question. When we offer to teach, which I like very much, is that teaching nothing more than express your own beliefs and how you feel and think about it, and give the other person the opportunity to make their own beliefs, their own statements and their own thinking?
ELIAS: Correct. In actuality, no individual teaches another individual. What you actually do is share your experiences and your philosophies, your preferences and your opinions with other individuals.
In that sharing, the other individual — or yourself, for you are all sharing experiences with each other — each individual expresses a recognition and an intake, so to speak, of the other’s experience and translates that in some manner in association with their own perception and their own experiences. This is a helpful action to each of you, for it allows an interaction with less separation and it opens different avenues, in which each individual may alter their perception of any particular situation.
COEN: Do you agree with me that the way I handle my teaching and also the way I work with the employees of the squash center is in line with what you’re saying now?
COEN: I’m still interested in the way people organize themselves. Is that also... My younger son is now entering the room, so I’ll get rid of him. (Elias laughs) Just a second.
Sorry, Elias. I had to make a compromise to get something done!
ELIAS: There is no apology necessary!
COEN: I like to know the way people organize themselves. I have an interest in that, probably from my Gramada background. Is the way I work within the racquet center and handle these kinds of relations with employees, people together, is that also a kind of a new start from the way of consciousness?
COEN: So it’s kind of an experimental playground to develop new ways of communication with each other?
ELIAS: Yes, and also implementing cooperation rather than compromise.
COEN: That’s interesting. I agree; there’s a difference. So, don’t look for compromise, but cooperation.
COEN: Accept different realities, accept different beliefs.
ELIAS: Correct. Recognize that cooperation may be achieved and (that) it is not necessary to be in agreement with each other to achieve that cooperation.
COEN: Let’s say in fifty or sixty years that will be the base of the way we organize ourselves as a community?
ELIAS: Yes, but that is not to say that you may not begin now! (Both laugh)
COEN: I understand. That’s another thing. You mentioned the year 2075, but if we want to create our own reality we can start now, in the moment.
ELIAS: Correct, and you may accomplish now.
COEN: Without conflict within financial sector or authorities or that kind of thing?
COEN: I have to think... I have a few more questions, but we have time enough. If it’s okay with you, I have a few short questions I would like to ask you.
ELIAS: Very well.
COEN: What do you think of my new car?
ELIAS: (Chuckles) Interesting question, for first of all, I do not think, and secondly, I may also express to you that objects such as a vehicle incorporate little significance to myself! Ha ha! What do YOU think of your new car?
COEN: Do you not like the color of it? (Both laugh) When I heard my wife had seen a blue car, I said okay, we must buy it! (Elias laughs)
My essence name — I listened to the tape, and I think it was Delaiter, but my own impression was Delaitre, the French.
COEN: Is it the French version with I-T-R-E, or is it T-E-R? Or it doesn’t matter?
COEN: The French version?
COEN: Do I have a strong connection with France?
ELIAS: In a manner of speaking. You incorporate many focuses in that location.
COEN: That was my feeling as well.
ELIAS: Therefore, that does generate an affinity for that culture and that physical area.
COEN: Is there a reason why I dislike London? (Elias chuckles) I’ve been there once, and I didn’t feel comfortable there.
ELIAS: And perhaps you may engage a brief conversation with Michael concerning these associations, for I venture to say that he incorporates similar associations. (Both laugh) In this, I may express to you, you do incorporate focuses in what you now term to be the United Kingdom but much less than in other physical locations, and it is not expressed as a preference.
COEN: Last week there was a new princess born in the Netherlands, as you might know, and the name was still not available. I said it was Catarina-Amalia, and I had it right and I didn’t know why. Is that an example for myself that information is available?
ELIAS: Yes, and an example of trusting yourself.
COEN: It really helps! (Elias chuckles)
A short question — you don’t like cars — but I had a problem with my car. The petrol instruments broke down. What’s behind it?
ELIAS: What is your impression?
COEN: (Laughs) I thought Esmeralda is involved in it.
ELIAS: And to what end?
COEN: That I would focus in the now. Now, the thing that slips in my mind is “don’t trust the machines, trust yourself.”
ELIAS: For you are creating it.
COEN: I am creating it myself?
ELIAS: Yes. In this, you are expressing imagery to yourself to be trusting yourself and to be trusting your creations, not as an outside expression but as an extension of yourself and that you are creating all of your reality. Therefore, you are creating this vehicle and how it operates. This is another example of a presentment to yourself of paying attention to yourself and what type of energy you are expressing outwardly.
COEN: I also viewed it as a gift instead of as a problem, which surprised me.
ELIAS: Yes! Yes, for it is an opportunity for you to be more objectively aware and trusting yourself and recognizing all that you create, rather than becoming a victim.
COEN: Is it also true that in widening your awareness you create more expressions or you offer yourself more of these kinds of experiences?
ELIAS: Yes, and you also notice more, which is significant for they interplay with each other. For as you notice more, you allow yourself to create more, for you begin to trust yourself more and you trust your abilities more, and therefore, you exercise them more.
COEN: Yes, just a kind of exercise, same as it is with sports.
ELIAS: (Chuckles) In a manner of speaking, yes. For the more that you practice, the more efficient you become.
COEN: So you develop as well?
ELIAS: In a manner of speaking.
COEN: The last few weeks I also did some of the auto-writing. I think it’s with Delaitre, but the words just flow in my head kind of easy and I feel that they are not my own words. Is that a communication with Delaitre or also with myself?
ELIAS: It is an allowance of yourself to be opening to more of your own energy. The reason that it feels not to be you is that what you are familiar with in association with yourself is this one attention. This is an allowance of yourself to be opening your awareness and allowing a flow of energy from essence.
COEN: You might call it Delaitre, but it is, of course, your own energy.
ELIAS: Yes, but it is a much broader energy than you are familiar with, much vaster.
COEN: That’s also the image that I have, that I’m kind of a caterpillar that will turn into a butterfly.
ELIAS: Yes. (Laughs) And are already sprouting those wings! Ha ha ha!
COEN: (Laughs) Now I fly!
I also found in sessions about the final focus that sometimes I feel very tired. I have the feeling that that also comes from me.
ELIAS: Let me express to you that this is a common misconception. This may be generated by some individuals that are the designated final focus, but that is associated with their beliefs and their individual choices and experiences.
Now; let me express to you that one association that is commonly expressed with individuals is an association with linear time, and therefore as they view themselves to be the designated final focus, their association with their experiences is colored. It is colored in a manner associated with the belief that the final is the indication of the last, which generates an association with regard to remanifestation or reincarnation, that you have traveled many lifetimes and you are weary from all of your travels.
COEN: Exhausted and that kind of thing?
Now; this is not to say that an individual does not generate a real reality that may reflect that, but it is quite associated with their beliefs. It is not innate in the designation of the final focus. That is merely a designation of a position of an attention.
COEN: In line with that, when I was young I always had extreme difficulty in getting to sleep. Then one day I read in one of the Seth books that some people have difficulty falling asleep because they have the feeling that they will die in their sleep and at the time that is more favorable than living. After I read that line, I had no troubles at all anymore!
ELIAS: (Chuckles) And therefore you have offered yourself information concerning what YOU were generating. Remember, this is not a rule, either. It is merely an example of one reason, so to speak, that may be influencing certain physical manifestations that an individual may generate. It is presented as an example.
But interesting that you offer this example to yourself, in offering that information to yourself that you may objectively understand your own creations more fully and that in actuality you are no closer to death in sleep than you are in waking state. Ha ha ha!
COEN: (Laughs) Yes, but you have to realize it!
ELIAS: There are many, many, many reasons that individuals may generate difficulty or disruption in sleep patterns.
COEN: Mine are gone now, so I don’t want to think about it anymore! (Elias laughs)
A few questions about focuses. Before I fall asleep or before I go to sleep, I see a lot of faces when I close my eyes. Is that an example of the focuses?
ELIAS: Yes. This also is quite common. As individuals widen their awareness and allow more of an openness, they generate visuals of other focuses.
Now; many times... (Doorbell sounds)
COEN: I have to get the door. I need two minutes. (Pause) Thank you! (Both laugh) We’ll talk about him later!
ELIAS: Many times, I may express to you, individuals express that these visualizations of these faces move quite rapidly and they incorporate difficulty in identifying them more clearly. I have expressed previously, the reason that they are generated in this rapidness is that as you allow yourself to incorporate these visualizations, you also automatically, without thought, generate a type of excitement which creates an expression of tension within your actual physical body consciousness, which increases the speed of the visuals. If you are noticing that these visuals move rapidly, you may allow yourself to relax more fully and they shall slow their movement that you may view them more clearly.
COEN: It also helps when I concentrate more on a particular face...
COEN: ...or send energy to it.
COEN: Do they view me as well, or is this also my own creation and if they are willing they are able to create it? Is there an exchange of energy?
ELIAS: There is always an exchange of energy, for you are all one. You are all the same essence. But as to whether the other individuals view you also, that is dependent upon the individuals. Some, yes. Generally speaking, future focuses do incorporate an awareness of other focuses that tune into them, so to speak. Those...
COEN: They are kind of waiting until I try to communicate with them?
ELIAS: If you are so choosing. Generally speaking, those that you identify as past focuses are not as open to actual visual or audible interaction with other focuses, although there are exceptions.
COEN: I understand.
About focuses, I have an image of five men on a sailing boat around 1600. They have merchandise and they travel between Denmark, Holland and Ireland. I also have the impression that we are talking about a focus of myself, a focus of you, a focus of my middle brother and two others. I also had the impression that sometimes we borrow the merchandise of others; so we use them, we steal them. (Elias laughs) I have the feeling that the five of us are making a lot of fun, and we don’t care about the rest of the world because we create our own world on our vessel.
ELIAS: (Laughs) You are quite correct!
COEN: Also concerning the names — me, Elias and Eric?
COEN: Can you give me an indication of the other two?
ELIAS: And shall you not investigate?
COEN: I’m curious!
ELIAS: (Laughs) I may express to you...
COEN: Are these two the same that I met the week I went away to school?
ELIAS: I may identify one of the other individuals as being an individual that has interacted with myself and is currently residing in the area that you identify as Belgium. Another individual that participates in that focus also has interacted with myself and resides in the physical location of Finland. These are quite clear clues. I may express to you that they may be quite easily discovered. (Chuckles)
COEN: Do my middle brother and I share the same essence or a bigger essence or another essence? I feel so connected to him.
ELIAS: You incorporate many, many focuses together, and you also incorporate many mergences with that essence. There is a tremendous familiarity between these two essences, but no, you are not of the same essence.
COEN: And that connection is stronger than other people around me? Is that question too broad?
ELIAS: I am understanding what you are expressing. In a manner of speaking, yes, objectively.
COEN: Let me think it over. I think I will come back to you with this subject, because I feel other questions.
I identified a focus in Scotland or Ireland — I’m not sure — a male, a hunter or farmer or shepherd, and he liked to walk over the hills and enjoy the beauty and silence of the landscape. I have the feeling that it’s a very nice focus although nothing spectacular happened in his life, around 1400.
ELIAS: Correct — a shepherd, Ireland.
COEN: Enjoying the hills, the beauty of the scenery?
COEN: Long walks over the hills, and he just sits there and listens?
ELIAS: Yes, and expresses quite a contentment.
COEN: What does that mean?
ELIAS: A calm and happy appreciation.
COEN: That’s what I feel, yes.
Question, World War II, did I play the focus of the little man with the mustache?
ELIAS: No, although you do incorporate a focus that does wear a mustache, but not that individual. Ha ha ha!
COEN: (Laughs) Well, I will do some work in that area.
When I was in high school I had to make an article about Paulus or Saulus, and it really went that easy that I have the feeling that I was connected to this individual.
COEN: Was I the same individual or was I connected with him?
ELIAS: Connected to.
COEN: Close connected?
COEN: And that was also the start of the religious era?
ELIAS: One of.
COEN: I have two names of great artists, Bruce Willis and Robbie Williams, and I also feel familiar with them. Can you give me some information about it?
ELIAS: The first individual you incorporate an observing essence role with, and the second individual you incorporate counterpart action with.
COEN: Counterpart action with Robbie Williams, and the other one observing?
COEN: I must have a lot of counterpart actions.
COEN: Very, very lot of?
ELIAS: Yes. (Laughs)
COEN: So if I feel familiar with some people, then normally I could say that that’s a counterpart action, in most cases?
ELIAS: Many times. But you may also incorporate a recognition of strong familiarities, and you may assure yourself that in those recognitions you do incorporate many focuses with the other individual.
COEN: I understand. I would like to make a few entries for the Game.
ELIAS: You may offer one, as per the agreed upon rules of this forum, and I shall accept one, and you may offer another within your next conversation. Ha ha ha ha!
COEN: (Laughs) So you are limiting my creativity?
ELIAS: I am not limiting, for it matters not with myself. But I adhere to the agreement of the group, and this is what has been...
COEN: Okay, you convinced me! (Elias laughs) I would like to make a new category, and it’s cars.
ELIAS: Very well.
COEN: Gramada, Rolls Royce.
ELIAS: One point.
COEN: Thank you.
ELIAS: Ha ha! And perhaps you may inquire of the group as to whether they choose to alter the rule of the Game in its limitation. Ha ha!
COEN: (Laughs) Okay. In one of your sessions, and in my beliefs as well, you indicate that people feel more connected with the alignment than with the essence family. I think in my case I feel more connected with Gramada than with Sumafi.
ELIAS: Let me express to you, this is a misunderstanding. I do not express that the individual may generate more of an association with the alignment, but that generally speaking, the alignment is more obvious in the manner in which the individual expresses themselves. But the belonging-to family expresses an equal generation of qualities and expressions; they may not necessarily be as obvious, as other individuals view you.
COEN: People view me as Sumafi, I guess, being more strict and more rules, yes. I agree.
I have another question — short answer, because it’s the last question. At this moment I have the feeling that we are playing with the concepts of power and authorities. For instance, we present ourselves with examples like the Clinton or Bush administrations, and in the Netherlands we have our own Prime Minister who they call Harry Potter. (Elias chuckles) Then on the other side, we have the conflict with Iraq and with people like Saddam Hussein. Also, in private I’m noticing an increase in power related conflicts or power related issues.
COEN: Do you agree with me?
ELIAS: Yes. This is associated with this wave in consciousness addressing to truths. Some very strong truths that you incorporate are associated with authority and power and leadership. In that movement, you are presenting to yourselves the opening of the avenue to be self-directing rather than continuing to be allowing authorities or what you view to be authorities to dictate to you what your choices may or may not be. This is a powerful movement in association with this shift in consciousness.
COEN: We create issues like Clinton, who made a fool of himself, and that the men in control of the world are not really as strong as we make them to be or we think they should be.
ELIAS: Correct, and they are not as absolute as you have associated with them previously.
COEN: Final question, I feel this conversation with you totally different than the first session we had. Is it because it’s a different kind of energy, or is it because I’m more eased and more relaxed?
ELIAS: The latter. You are generating more of a relaxation and not as nervous. (Laughs)
COEN: The final-final, about accepting differences. We had a conflict with my younger son yesterday about lighting a fire near the school. Is that also an example for me of letting him go? Can you comment on that?
ELIAS: It is an example to you to emphasize differences and to emphasize to yourself your preferences and the strength of your truths, that there are certain behaviors that are acceptable and certain behaviors that are not.
COEN: Instead of talking to him and exchanging philosophies, I force upon him that he should not do it.
ELIAS: Correct, rather than listening and sharing and offering yourself information as to what the motivation was.
COEN: So the discussion my wife had with him last night was an example of the way it should be, it could be.
ELIAS: Could be, and offers more of an expression of sharing, which opens an avenue to acceptance of these differences and also offers you more information and insight into the expression of another individual’s perception and their motivations.
COEN: I had to listen to my anger, my emotion of anger, that something was happening.
ELIAS: Anger is an expression that is informing you that in the moment you view yourself to be without choice.
COEN: That is correct! That was correct yesterday night! (Elias laughs) Thank you, Elias!
ELIAS: You are very welcome, my dear friend. I shall be anticipating our next meeting, and I shall continue to be expressing my energy with you in the interim time framework. (Laughs)
COEN: Thank you very much.
ELIAS: I shall offer you one expression concerning your vehicle, that I am appreciating of the color! (Laughs)
COEN: (Laughs) Thank you. You made me happy now!
ELIAS: To you, my dear friend, in great affection and tremendous encouragement, au revoir.
COEN: Au revoir.
Elias departs after 57 minutes.
(1) Transcriber’s note: See 10/23/03, for a different take on Coen’s essence name.
©2006 Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved
Copyright 2003 Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved.