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Greetings. Occasionally, whilst within the throes of objective internal conflict, an individual must step back, so to speak, and survey the situation subjectively. This is to say that when involved quite strongly objectively, the subjective tends to be ignored, in your terms. This is why you may not be able to think within a straight-forward manner. While you may be considering that "all is lost", quotes, it has only been masked by belief systems. These belief systems are quite important to objective focus, as we have stated previously. However, they may be quite too influencing upon your rational, so to speak, thought processes. By opening to your subjective interpretations of situations involving the objective reality of this focus, you may begin to incorporate an understanding of other probabilities that are available to you. This does not mean that this probability is incorrect. It is only to say that other choices are open to you at any given time.
Within this turmoil, you will notice waves of energy that will ebb and then subside, just as with your ocean. If you are trying to reach an object upon the bottom of your ocean, it would be much easier to reach for this object whilst the flow is at its lowest point, so to speak; this also being the case within your waves of turmoil. As these waves subside, you may easily reach within this thinner layer of this energy and have access to certain subjective understanding that may be inaccessible to you while this wave is at full peak. If I may suggest an exercise: Be quietly sitting within one of your meditative expressions and be focusing upon these waves of energy, and as the wave is at its lower, so to speak, point, continue the focus through this wave to the bottom of your ocean. If your intent is clear, you may be viewing partially this subjective reasoning, so to speak, that may be helpful in influencing your objective train of thought.
In actuality, these conflict scenarios are a creation for you, by you, as an instrument of focus. When you are within these expressions, you may tend to focus more intently. You only focus upon what you term to be negative expressions, when in reality these expressions have no positive or negative attached. If you consider these expressions as what they are, instruments of focus, you may more easily see beyond the expression to the intent. When the turmoil is allowed to overshadow the intent, all that you may see will be a thick cloud, so to speak, as if the ocean bottom has been churned. Be attempting this exercise within your daily routine and you will be noticing that these expressions are actually quite valuable to you. Closing with much loving support, ta.
P.S. We shall be welcoming Olivia back the land of the dead guys.